Fake Fruit Factory. Patrick Wensink

      

      PRAISE FOR PATRICK WENSINK & FAKE FRUIT FACTORY

      “Patrick Wensink’s Fake Fruit Factory is a comedy machine, pumping out madcap action, large-scale disaster, and one strange character after another. Also, fake fruit.”

      —owen king, author of Double Feature

      “There are plenty of bastards in this world, but Patrick Wensink isn’t one of them. Well, maybe. He is our Terry Southern and Paul Krassner and possibly one day even our own Jonathan Swift . . . ”

      —Scott McClanahan, author of Hill William and Crapalachia

      “I like Patrick Wensink’s work so much my heart had to issue its own cease-and-desist order.”

      —Gary Shteyngart, author of Super Sad True Love Story

      “A small town rallies to beat ever worsening odds against its survival in this madcap comic novel.”

      —KIRKUS

      CURBSIDE SPLENDOR PUBLISHING

      All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except in the case of short passages quoted in reviews.

      The stories contained herein are works of fiction. All incidents, situations, institutions, governments, and people are fictional and any similarity to characters or persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.

      Published by Curbside Splendor Publishing, Inc., Chicago, Illinois in 2015.

      First Edition

      Copyright © 2015 by Patrick Wensink

      Library of Congress Control Number: 2015939311

      ISBN 978-1-94-043056-0

      Edited by Todd Summar

      Designed by Alban Fischer

      Manufactured in the United States of America.

       www.curbsidesplendor.com

      For Don and Norma Wensink

      “All thoughts are prey to some beast.”

      Bill Callahan

      PART ONE