Growing
together
For Pippa,
who has taught me so much
over thirty-five years together
Related titles from Church House Publishing
Church House Publishing
Church House
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London SW1P 3AZ
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ISBN 978 0 7151 4144 1
Published 2005 by
Church House Publishing.
Second edition 2007
Copyright © Andrew Body 2005, 2007
Illustrations © Paul Airy 2005
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or stored or transmitted by any means or in any form, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or any information storage and retrieval system without written permission which should be sought from the Copyright Administrator, Church House Publishing, Church House, Great Smith Street, London SW1P 3AZ.
email: [email protected]
Cover design by ie Design Consultancy
Printed in England by Cromwell Press Ltd,
Trowbridge, Wiltshire
Contents
Affection, lust and love – an introductory chapter
Ingredients of the wedding cake
Acknowledgements
Extracts from The Works: Selected Poems by Pam Ayres reproduced with the permission of BBC Worldwide Limited. Copyright © Pam Ayres 1992.
Extract from the Collected Poems of T. S. Eliot reproduced with the permission of Faber and Faber.
Extract from Too Many Songs by Tom Lehrer reproduced with the permission of Methuen Publishing Ltd.
Extracts from Common Worship: Pastoral Services reproduced with the permission of the Archbishops’ Council.
Extract from Poems by Steve Turner copyright © 2002 Steve Turner. Used by permission of Lion Hudson plc.
How to use this book
Don’t read it from cover to cover
The King’s advice to Alice in Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland is the usual way to read books:
Begin at the beginning, and go on till you come to the end; then stop.
However, this book is different. It would be good to begin at the beginning, with the introductory chapter ‘Affection, lust and love’, and it would be good to end with the final chapter, called ‘Ingredients of the wedding cake’, which is different because it is a practical guide to ways in which you can plan your wedding service. But what you do in the middle is entirely up to you. The chapters are arranged alphabetically, and not in any order of importance. You can read them in any order you prefer.
Read it one chapter at a time
This book takes a dozen topics and approaches them in three ways:
Questions are provided to get you thinking and talking. Some of them will be irrelevant to you – others may occupy you for a long time.
Read it separately and then together
Like some dishes in restaurants, this is ‘for two people’. To get the most out of it, each of you needs to read a chapter, and then share the things it has raised for you. Compare notes on your individual answers to the questions and see how much you think the same way. Even deciding in which order to take the chapters could provoke some interesting discussions! If you have talked long and hard about the particular subject, you can feel good that you have done so. If another part of what is written here opens up ideas you have not had the opportunity to share, then that must be a good thing as well.
Read