Nick Morgan

Power Cues


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      PRAISE FOR POWER CUES

      “Nick Morgan's ideas in Power Cues aren't just talk. They're the depth and pulse of what's missing when you ask why you're not more successful. This is your chance to fix that.”

      —Chris Brogan, CEO and Publisher, Owner magazine

      “There are few skills more important in the twenty-first century than communicating with persuasion. Nick Morgan is a true master of this craft, with advice and insight honed in decades as a speaking coach. Read this engaging book and watch your impact soar.”

      —Pamela Slim, best-selling author, Body of Work

      “I have to study body language every day when I negotiate with customers. Power Cues is the book I wish I'd had twenty years ago—I would have won a lot more negotiations and made a lot more money!”

      —Les Gold, star of truTV's Hardcore Pawn; New York Times best-selling author, For What It's Worth

      “Finally, a book that defines the importance of how the human form communicates. Morgan has researched how humans interact and provides practical, scientifically proven tips for communicating confidently with influence. Bravo!”

      —Nancy Duarte, CEO, Duarte, Inc.; author, HBR Guide to Persuasive Presentations

      “This is one of the most important books you will ever read. Not just this year—ever. There's an old saying that words account for only 7 percent of your communication. Power Cues covers the other 93 percent (and even some of the 7 percent). My hope is that everybody in the workforce today will read this book. More important, I wish that every student would be forced to read this book—or take a class with Nick Morgan.”

      —Mitch Joel, President, Twist Image; author, Six Pixels of Separation and Ctrl Alt Delete

      “Wow! I wish I'd had this book ten years ago. Nick Morgan is a masterful communicator and teacher, and he has written another must-have book for anyone serious about greatly improving their interpersonal communication and leadership skills. A very helpful, informative, and engaging read—perfect for businesspeople, students, teachers, and beyond.”

      —Garr Reynolds, author, Presentation Zen and The Naked Presenter

      POWER CUES

      The Subtle Science of Leading Groups,

       Persuading Others, and

       Maximizing Your Personal Impact

      NICK MORGAN

      HARVARD BUSINESS REVIEW PRESS

      BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS

      Copyright 2014 Nicholas H. Morgan

      All rights reserved

      Printed in the United States of America

      10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

      No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise), without the prior permission of the publisher. Requests for permission should be directed to [email protected], or mailed to Permissions, Harvard Business School Publishing, 60 Harvard Way, Boston, Massachusetts 02163.

      The web addresses referenced in this book were live and correct at the time of the book's publication but may be subject to change.

       Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

      Morgan, Nick.

      Power cues : the subtle science of leading groups, persuading others, and maximizing your personal impact / Nick Morgan.

      pages cm

      ISBN 978-1-4221-9350-1 (alk. paper)

      1. Communication in management. 2. Interpersonal communication.

      3. Influence (Psychology) 4. Leadership. 1. Title.

      HD30.3.M665 2014

      658.4’5—dc23

      2013050170

      The paper used in this publication meets the requirements of the American National Standard for Permanence of Paper for Publications and Documents in Libraries and Archives Z39.48-1992.

      ISBN: 9781422193501

      eISBN: 9781422193600

      i Nikki

      Tri chynnig i Gymro

      CONTENTS

      INTRODUCTION

       The Invisible Force That Rules

       Human Interaction

      CHAPTER ONE

       Knowing Your Own Power Cues

       Becoming Self-Aware and the Significance of Gesture

      CHAPTER TWO

       Taking Charge of Your Nonverbal Communication

       Projecting Your Desired Persona—through Your Emotions

      CHAPTER THREE

       Reading the Unconscious Signals of Others

       How to Recognize and Understand Emotional Cues in Gestures

      CHAPTER FOUR

       Mastering Your Own Voice

       The Most Powerful Leadership Cue

      CHAPTER FIVE

       Communicating as a Leader

       Combining Voice and Body Language for Success

      CHAPTER SIX

       Using Your Intuition Effectively

       What Your Gut Is Really Saying—and How to Leverage It

      CHAPTER SEVEN

       Synchronizing Minds

       How to Use Story to Get on the Same Wavelength

      CONCLUSION

       Community and Communication

       Radical Authenticity

      Notes

      Acknowledgments

      About the Author

      INTRODUCTION

      The Invisible Force That Rules Human Interaction

      The Dalai Lama, My Father, and My Early Death

      Three things happened to me when I was seventeen that turned out to have a significant effect on my interest in communications and, specifically, nonverbal communications, later in life. First, I read a book about the Dalai Lama and made him one of my personal heroes.1 Second, I learned my father was gay. And third, I died.

      Let me take those in order. I read a book about the Dalai Lama’s escape into India from the Communists in 1959 and immediately cast him as one of my heroes in a pantheon that included Martin Luther King Jr., President John F. Kennedy, and the Beatles. I was excited, therefore, a half-dozen or so years later when I had the chance to hear the Dalai Lama speak at the University of Virginia, where I was a graduate student, and cheerfully queued up for a seat in the small auditorium.

      The room was overflowing with devotees, local Buddhists, and the merely curious. There was an excited, impatient buzz—or at least as impatient as Buddhists get—and the Dalai