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First published in Great Britain in 2015 by Egmont UK Limited
The Yellow Building, 1 Nicholas Road, London W11 4AN
Text copyright © 2015 Jamie Buxton
The moral rights of the author have been asserted
First e-book edition 2015
ISBN 978 1 4052 67991
Ebook ISBN 978 1 7803 13689
A CIP catalogue record for this title is available from the British Library
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher.
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For Amanda.
Thank you.
Contents
1. In which I tell you pretty much all I’ve learned before we’ve even started
2. In which you have the huge honour of meeting me
3. In which a guest actually arrives at the inn
4. In which I talk about mud (yes, mud)
5. In which I introduce you to our dead neighbours
6. In which my sister is too neighbourly
7. In which I overhear what I wish I hadn’t
8. In which help comes from an unlikely source and I behave oddly
9. In which I have a revelation
10. In which I accept that I have ruined my life forever
11. In which my father lets me down. Again. And uppances come
12. In which my fate is decided
14. In which an old god feasts
15. In which I smell a smell and see a sight
16. In which the Quiet Gentleman changes names
17. In which I draw a blasphemous hippopotamus
18. In which I discover my future
19. In which I learn a thing or two
20. In which I miss the Quiet Gentleman
21. In which I lose an ache and gain a worry
22. In which the Quiet Gentlemen returns
23. In which the Quiet Gentleman puts me straight
24. In which I understand an idea
25. In which an idea bears fruit
26. In which I have an unexpected encounter
27. In which I prove my worth
28. In which I learn my fate
29. In which I leave my sister
30. In which a boy discovers he can look at a queen
31. In which my new life begins
32. In which the queen gives me a name
33. In which I receive a proposition
34. In which Potipher delivers unwelcome news
35. In which I am led astray
36. In which the queen favours me
37. In which I do not ride in a chariot
38. In which I pay for my mistake
39. In which the trap closes
40. In which I do not learn a lesson
41. In which I make a sacrifice
42. In which I learn that death leads a dog’s life
43. In which I meet the king
44. In which I have an unexpected visitor
45. In which I put my experience to use
46. In which I learn that if you don’t move forward, you go back
47. In which I see an unexpected consequence of my actions
48. In which a truth is revealed
49. In which I make a choice
50. In which I see the destruction of Thutmose’s workshops
51. In which I head into the desert
52. In which I learn something surprising about myself
53. In which I take a long walk in the dark
54. In which I state the obvious
55. In which we jump out of the frying pan and