Erin Watt

When It's Real


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up calling Jim.

      “Have you seen the news?” he crows when he answers.

      Our world’s a little sick when what I fave on Twitter is considered news. A mass killing in Africa doesn’t get as many eyeballs as me liking some random girl’s art. “I need to log in to my Twitter account.”

      “Why? Are you unhappy with how it’s going? Claudia and I talked this morning. Everyone’s excited. You’re getting the best press you’ve had in months. Hold on, I’ll read some to you.”

      I can hear street noise. “Are you texting and driving?”

      “Yes. How do you think I get anything done in this town?”

      “Forget it. I’ll look it up myself.”

      I hang up before he can kill himself trying to read the gossip column headlines.

      I hit the most famous celeb site I know and immediately see a smarmy picture of me side-eying a camera.

      Oakley Ford’s Tweet Makes a Fan’s Dream Come True!

      Ford fangirls take notice!

      Last night global superstar Oakley Ford set his saplings on fire when he favorited a fan’s drawing of him. According to the girl’s Twitter account, seventeen-year-old Vaughn just broke up with a longtime boyfriend and she’s been consoling herself by playing Ford’s self-titled release on repeat.

      Ford’s been notoriously quiet on Twitter except for the occasional shout-out to a fellow artist, so this activity was definitely out of character! We weren’t the only ones who noticed. Fans jumped all over his fave by Retweeting the picture. The artist’s own account grew from 89 followers to 8000. Her account exploded after Oakley Ford Tweeted her back.

      Is this a new romance for Oakley? He hasn’t been linked to anyone—for more than a night—since April Showers. Gossip Central caught up with April outside Nice Guy in LA. April appeared blindsided by the news that Oakley is finally moving on, telling us, “You know more about Oakley’s life than I do.” Ford’s people haven’t commented.

      The fan interaction has spurred #Fordfangoals to trend on Twitter. It’s been two years since we’ve had any new Oakley Ford music. Maybe Vaughn will serve as new inspiration!

      Christ. I follow the link to the Twitter page to read about my so-called interaction with Vaughn.

      Oakley Ford

Verified @VeryVaughn Thanks for sketching my left side. It’s my best.

      I scroll through what seems like a thousand Tweets before I get to her response.

      Vaughn Bennett @OakleyFord Haha! U don’t have a bad side.

      Oakley Ford

Verified @VeryVaughn Do you have a red pencil? I’m blushing.

      Excuse me while I vomit. I’m blushing? What a lame-ass response. I’m Oakley Ford. I don’t blush. What do I have to be embarrassed about?

      @jelly_bean1984 @ OakleyFord Please Oak I luv u. Please fave my tweet!!!!!

      @cassandra.vega.5 @ OakleyFord ur soooooo bbbbeeutiful. I

u so much! Ur my bae!

      @OakleyFord_stanNo1 @ OakleyFord Love you Oakley. Can’t wait for another album.

      This is frickin’ impossible. I tap on Vaughn’s stream and breathe a sigh of relief. It’s so much easier to read.

      Vaughn Bennett @OakleyFord I don’t believe u blush. But I do have a red pencil.

      She Tweeted another picture of just a cheek and some lightly shaded red on the upper curve. Nice. Even though it’s not an accurate representation, I can’t deny her talent.

      I swipe past dozens of people replying to her, and find mine.

      Oakley Ford

Verified @VeryVaughn So you’re taking requests. I’d like to see a self-portrait.

      Vaughn Bennett @OakleyFord Like this?

      I eagerly scroll. Shit, did she send me a—it’s a sketch of her phone.

      Oakley Ford

Verified @VeryVaughn Modern and sleek. I like it.

      These responses are terrible. If I were replying, I’d have said something like—

      I dial Jim again. “I want access to my Twitter account. If I’m dating this chick, I should be able to respond to her directly.”

      “What? Why would you want to do that?”

      “Because I do. So do I get access or do I make up a different account?”

      “Hold on.” He sighs then barks to some assistant. “Get Claudia on the phone and find out how to get Oak on Twitter.”

       9

      HER

      “Are you supposed to be dating Oakley Ford?!”

      W’s loud, angry voice hurts my eardrums, but I don’t ask him to calm down. This is the first opportunity we’ve had to talk on the phone since my online conversation with Oakley began. My boyfriend has clearly saved up his frustration from these past twenty-four hours and it all comes pouring out now.

      “I can’t confirm or deny that,” I answer with a sigh.

      “Bull! You don’t know how many of our friends called and texted to tell me you’re flirting online with Oakley Ford!”

      My guard snaps up. “I hope you didn’t say anything about my job. You signed an NDA, W. If you break it, Diamond will—”

      “Ruin my life,” he finishes sourly. “Yeah, I know.”

      Ugh, this is not about W’s life, but I know from past experience that I’m going to have to listen to him bitch and moan until he gets it out of his system. “So what did you tell everyone?”

      “That we’re both upset about our breakup and that flirting with some celebredouche is your way of trying to get over me.”

      I wince at his word choice, but only say, “Thank you.”

      There’s a long pause.

      “What exactly are you doing with Ford?” W mutters.

      “Not much.” I hesitate. “We’re just going to be hanging out—for the cameras—a few times. And there might be a kiss. No, a peck. And none of it is real, remember?”

      “It better not be.” My heart flips a little over his jealousy, only to die a quick death at his next words. “I’m not happy looking like a loser here.”

      A whiny voice sounds from my bedroom doorway. “Vaughn! We need our phone back!”

      I hold up one finger to silence Shane. “I promise, it’s all a show,” I assure my boyfriend. “Just like reality TV.”

      “We need to call Kenny!” Spencer shouts, coming up to stand beside his twin. They both glare at me, the gold in their hazel eyes sparking angrily. At twelve, the two are already taller than my five feet six inches and could easily wrestle the phone away.

      I sigh. “I have to go. The twins need their phone.