Erin Lawless

Somewhere Only We Know: The bestselling laugh out loud millenial romantic comedy


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made with real fruit and green coffee extract for a low-calorie boost of natural energy you can enjoy anywhere," the barista intoned in the most bored-sounding voice known to man, clearly reciting from her training script. Alex blinked at her.

      "Er, sounds…great. Make that two of those thingies, then."

      After a reasonably awkward exchange, where both tried to pay for the other, they each just paid for their own and left the miserable barista to her evening. Outside, the evening was still hot and sticky. Nadia sipped her drink through its straw.

      "Well, go on then," she gestured at Alex's drink. "What do you think?"

      Alex took a tentative sip, then a larger one. The fat ice cubes rattled inside the transparent plastic cup. "Hmm. Well, it's certainly 'refreshing'," was his blunt assessment.

      Nadia laughed. "So you're not enjoying a boost of low-calorie natural energy right now?"

      "Ask me again when I'm about halfway finished."

      "Anyway, I'm sorry I dragged you away from your dinner plans for a drink that's a bit shit," Nadia apologised.

      "I know, and it's not even an alcoholic one," Alex agreed solemnly.

      "And we couldn't even sit in to drink them," said Nadia, gesturing behind them to where the barista had continued stacking up the chairs beyond the glass.

      "So whereabouts do you live?" Alex asked her. Nadia blanched. She was enjoying his company and all – and she had been the one to drag him off the Tube three stops early – but she could imagine Holly's face if she suddenly arrived home with Alex in tow. Their flat was usually just on the embarrassing side of messy and there was more than the off-chance in this weather that Holly might be sitting on the sofa wearing only a vest top and knickers.

      "Er." She gestured vaguely to the south-east.

      "I can't bear the thought of getting back in that sauna of a Tube, even with my oh-so-refreshing drink," Alex explained. "I was going to walk towards Tooting over the Common. If that's on your way, I can walk you partway home."

      Nadia felt stupid. Of course this very proper gentleman wasn't just inviting himself back to her digs.

      "That sounds like a pretty great idea," she told him, turning on her heel in the direction of home. "A walk on Clapham Common of a summer's evening. Lovely!"

      "Cool," Alex smiled, turning and falling into step beside Nadia as they moved off towards the green expanse ahead of them. "But I'm not going to lie to you, Nadia. When I reach Tooting, I am going to have the biggest, most disgusting kebab going."

       Alex

      "Oh, hang on." Nadia said, suddenly breaking off their conversation. "I've just got to." She handed him her half-finished drink along with her little handbag and moved purposefully towards a small children's play area.

      "I think it's locked up," Alex warned her, immediately noticing the shiny, large padlock holding the area's gate firmly in place. Nadia shot him a look over her shoulder as she reached with her foot for the top of the fencing. Alex glanced away politely as the hem of Nadia's dress rode up her leg, and by the time he looked back she was standing inside the small play park grinning at him.

      "Well? Are you coming?"

      Alex moved towards the fencing, dubiously. "Are we likely to get in trouble for this?" he asked.

      Nadia shrugged, reaching over the fence and taking both drinks and her bag out of his hands. "I never have before."

      "Before?" Alex studied the – admittedly very low – fencing carefully, testing its strength by putting his weight on it briefly. "Do you make a habit of breaking into playgrounds?"

      "Just this one," Nadia told him solemnly. "Now stop being a baby, come on."

      "I imagine it's locked up for a reason," Alex insisted, as he nervously swung one leg into place.

      "Yes, to keep out dogs and teenagers," Nadia assured him, watching as he clumsily vaulted the barrier. "And we are neither." Alex surreptitiously checked his suit trousers for snags and rips as he pretended to dust them down. When he straightened, Nadia was looking at him with a little smile on her face. Without comment she handed him back his drink.

      "Would you care for a seat?" she asked him, gesturing behind them as she dropped her handbag to the grass.

      "More of a swing, really," Alex pointed out. Nadia ignored him, and sat down on the left-most swing, scudding her wedge heels through the tight-packed wood chipping that lay beneath them as she started swinging back and forth. Alex set his drink down to one side before settling on the second swing, holding on to both chains. Nadia wasn't even holding onto one; she smiled at him as she brought her drink up to her mouth.

      "What's the matter?" she asked him. "Don't you know how to swing?"

      "That sounds like a chat-up line from the seventies," Alex retorted. "But of course I know how to swing." Nadia raised an eyebrow at him and kicked off the ground a little harder, making Alex's stomach go all nervy about the fact that she still wasn't holding on.

      "I always wanted to go over the bar when I was a kid," Nadia told him, looking wistfully up at the pole above them.

      "That can't actually happen," Alex scoffed.

      "Yes it can!" Nadia insisted. "I've seen it on YouTube."

      "It defies the laws of physics," Alex argued.

      "God!" Nadia laughed. She finally submitted to her perilous height by looping the arm that held her almost-finished drink around one of the swing chains. "Let's just put it this way. I sure hope my kids are the sort of kids that want to go over the bar, rather than automatically believe it's impossible."

      "Are you saying that all of humanity splits into those who want to go over the bar and those who don't?" Alex teased. “That’s deep, man!”

      "No," Nadia shook her head emphatically. "But maybe I'm saying that humanity splits into those who dream about going over the bar and those that are too scared to try for it."

      "Well." Alex laughed shortly. "That's a pretty damning assessment of my personality. And we've only just met!"

      Nadia laughed too, looking sideways at him as she pushed herself higher and higher yet. "Okay, so that's a little black and white. But, it's true. I do think you could benefit from living life on the edge a little more, if you don't mind me saying."

      "On the edge? Look at me. I'm trespassing, drinking some weird drink I've never even heard of before today, sitting on a swing and – okay, I'll admit it – I haven't been on a swing for at least ten years…"

      "Really?" Nadia genuinely sounded surprised. "God, Alex! What do you do with your time?"

      And Alex didn't answer, because he found he didn't really have one. They swung for a few moments in silence before Nadia broke the stalemate by dropping her now-empty plastic cup to the ground; the remaining ice clattered inside it.

      "You know, Holly and I thought that Lila was your girlfriend, at first," she told him.

      "I know," was all Alex replied.

      "But, looking back, you didn't seem like a proper couple," Nadia continued. Alex flinched.

      "Why's that?" he couldn't help but ask. "Do you think Lila is one of the 'over the bar'-type people, or something?"

      Nadia laughed. "No, it’s not that. But it didn't seem like…" She paused to choose her words carefully. "Like you were particularly comfortable, you know?"

      Yup, Alex knew. He kicked off the ground a little harder, swinging completely forward for the first time, the soles of his shoes reaching free from the chipping. Ahead of him the sky was coral and pink as it chased the setting sun, all but disappeared into the west, sending their shadows yawning outwards behind them. It was still a tad too light for any stars to be visible, but it was getting late all the same. I must go home in a minute Alex told himself sternly. Instead:

      "If