Judith McWilliams

Practice Husband


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rarely are. But we’re never going to get anywhere if you can’t bring yourself to make me a counteroffer.”

      “I need to explain something to you first.” Addy groped for words, wanting him to understand what she felt in the hope that he’d be more sympathetic to what she wanted.

      Joe took a long swallow of his Scotch, studying her over the rim of the glass. “About what?” he finally asked.

      “About why I came back from Africa. You see, my Aunt Margaret asked me if I wanted to be a nun.”

      A nun! No! His mind totally repudiated the idea. Not his Addy.

      Addy chuckled at his expression. “That was kind of my reaction, too. Not that there’s anything wrong with being a nun, it’s just that it isn’t right for me.”

      Joe felt some of his tenseness dissolve at her reassuring words.

      “But the question did make me examine what it was that I wanted to do with my life,” Addy continued. “Something I’ve never done before. I’ve simply sort of gone with the flow.”

      “Like most people,” he said cautiously, wondering where this was leading.

      “Yes.” She nodded in agreement. “Anyway, when I thought about it, I realized that it wasn’t really a what I wanted so much as a who. Or several whos.”

      Addy leaned forward in her eagerness to explain, and Joe’s eyes were drawn to the neckline of her dress, which at that angle was giving him a tantalizing glimpse of the swell of her breasts. He swallowed and forced his eyes up to her earnest face.

      “What whos?” he asked.

      “A husband and kids,” she blurted out.

      Joe’s eyes widened as the impact of what she was saying hit him with the force of a blow. She couldn’t mean that she wanted him to marry her, could she? A confusing swirl of emotions tore through him, the overriding one being panic.

      “But I have a problem,” she continued. “Actually, I have several.”

      “Such as?” he asked cautiously.

      Addy absently tucked a wayward strand of hair that had escaped from her chignon behind her ear and said, “First of all, the small size of the pool.”

      “The pool?” Joe tore his gaze away from the way the dark red curl was snuggled against her slim neck. What she was saying was difficult enough to follow without his getting sidetracked.

      “Of eligible men to marry,” she explained patiently. “Most of the good ones are already taken. And I don’t have the—” she gestured ineffectually “—the ability to attract the few who are available.”

      Joe allowed his eyes to roam down the length of her body. “I wouldn’t be too sure of that,” he murmured.

      Addy swallowed, trying to ignore the way her skin prickled under his stare. “I’m not talking about grabbing their attention. I’m talking about maintaining it long enough for a relationship to develop. The plain truth is that eligible men make me tongue-tied. I know I’m not overweight anymore on the outside, but inside I still feel awkward and unattractive.”

      Joe studied her, surprised by her admission, although he could certainly relate to it. He had more money than anyone in this damn town and yet he still felt socially inferior at any gathering.

      “I have no experience with making small talk with men,” she plowed on when he didn’t say anything. “With the kind of sexual banter that every other woman I know seems to have learned in grade school. I don’t know what men like or how they think or what they expect from a date....”

      “It can’t be that bad.” Joe felt an urge to comfort her. To put his arms around her and wipe away the uncertainty darkening her eyes.

      Addy grimaced. “Do you know how many dates I’ve had in my life? I’ll tell you,” she rushed on before he could say anything. “Three. Exactly three. One in high school and the twit parked the car on the side of the road and demanded sex.”

      “His technique left a lot to be desired, even for a high-school kid,” Joe said dryly.

      “Technique nothing. He told me that anyone as fat as I was should be grateful to trade sex for a date.”

      “The little bastard!” Joe felt a flash of anger at Addy’s bleak expression.

      “Definitely. Anyway, I slapped him and walked home. My second date was during nurse’s training and all he wanted to talk about was his microbes. I doubt that I even registered as a woman to him. I was simply an audience who was too unsure of herself to tell him that I found him boring as the devil.”

      Joe chuckled. “You said three. What about the third?”

      “The son of a patient I nursed. His mother was an unstable diabetic, and he was divorced with two teenagers. one of whom was pregnant and the other one was strung out on drugs. He saw me as the answer to all his problems. A nurse to take care of his family.”

      Joe shook his head. “The man was blind.”

      “Desperate,” Addy corrected, “but what I was trying to make you understand was that I have no experience at dating. And if I’m going to have any luck at finding a husband, I’m going to have to get some.”

      “What ever happened to looking across a room and falling madly in love?”

      “I did that once,” Addy assured him seriously. “At a hospital dance. As usual, I was standing on the sidelines trying to pretend that I was waiting for someone who just hadn’t shown up yet. Then I looked over at the refreshment table and saw the most gorgeous man. Every hormone I had went into overdrive.”

      “What happened?”

      “I mentioned him to a girlfriend of mine later in the evening, and she said that he was a disbarred lawyer who was at the hospital doing community service that had been ordered by the court because he’d been convicted of embezzling funds from his elderly clients. That took the shine off my feelings.”

      “I rather imagine it might. All right, I’ll concede that you have no experience at dating, but what does that have to do with your property?” Joe decided to risk finding out if he was the husband she had in mind.

      Addy ran her tongue over her lower lip, took a deep breath and blurted out her plan. “I’ll sell you my property if you’ll let me practice dating skills on you.”

      Joe blinked, taken aback. “Exactly what do I have to do?” he asked cautiously.

      “Well... I thought... If we were to have some dates, then I could practice relating to a man. And you could tell me how men feel about various things. That way when I went out with a real candidate, I’d have some firsthand knowledge of how the male mind works.”

      Joe stared down at his drink as he considered her crazy idea. But the more he thought about it, the saner it seemed. Addy had identified her goal, as well as what it was that was keeping her from reaching that goal, and she’d thought out a logical way to remedy her lack. Her reasoning was impeccable. What she really wanted was a combination brother and Dutch uncle. He glanced up into her soft, brown eyes, which were watching him hopefully.

      He could help her, he told himself. It wasn’t as if she were trying to marry him. Which made sense because he’d always known that his main attraction for women was his money, and Addy didn’t care about money.

      No, Addy wasn’t a threat to his blissfully single state. And she was his friend, he reminded himself. And while he didn’t have a great deal of experience with friends, even he knew that friends helped each other out. His eyes homed in on the soft, pink fullness of her lips. Would his tutelage include kissing her? The idea shook his composure.

      Her land. He dragged his mind back to the central issue with an effort.

      “It’s an intriguing idea,” he said slowly,