we go then?’ Jaddi flashed a smile at Ben and hooked an arm around Lizzie. He would learn soon enough to let Lizzie’s sarcasm wash over him. The last thing they needed was to start their trip with a falling-out.
‘Are you all right with this?’ Jaddi asked Lizzie, as they scooped up their backpacks.
Lizzie shrugged. ‘It doesn’t feel like I have a choice. I just want it be us, that’s all.’
‘I second that,’ Samantha said, moving closer. ‘How can we be ourselves with a cameraman tagging along?’
‘It will be us. We’ll get used to the camera in no time, that’s what they always say on those reality shows, but look, we’re in this together. If you don’t want to do it, if you want to go home, figure something else out, then say the word and we can.’
Jaddi could sense Caroline’s panic as she hovered behind them and willed the producer not to jump in. This had to be Lizzie’s choice.
‘Promise it’ll feel like it’s just us?’ Lizzie asked, pulling her lower lip between her teeth.
‘I promise.’ Jaddi smiled, wrapping her arms around them both and dipping her head forward. She hoped it was a promise she could keep. Lizzie and Samantha did the same, their three foreheads touching. They stayed like that for several seconds, their fears passing between them without needing to be voiced.
A commotion from across the terminal caught Jaddi’s attention. They stepped out of each other’s arms and turned to watch as a figure ran towards them, darting in and out of people, jumping over suitcases and waving his arms in the air.
‘Lizzie!’ a voice shouted, as a head jumped up above a queue of people next to them.
Lizzie gasped as the athletic frame of her younger brother sprinted into view. ‘Aaron, what on earth are you doing here?’
‘I couldn’t let you go without saying goodbye,’ he said, gulping in long mouthfuls of air. ‘My train was delayed. I thought I’d missed you.’
Without a word, Ben unzipped his shoulder bag and pulled out a camera the size of two shoe boxes. He pressed a button and lifted it with ease onto his right shoulder, obscuring half of his face as one eye stared down a black scope.
Lizzie pulled her brother towards her and wrapped her arms around him. ‘You didn’t need to come all this way. We said goodbye last night.’ She looked up, her eyes scanning the terminal. ‘Are Mum and Dad with you?’
Aaron shook his head. ‘They didn’t want to make it harder for you. They do understand what you’re doing. I know it doesn’t seem that way, but they do. We all do.’
Tears filled Lizzie’s eyes as she continued to hold onto Aaron.
‘How are you going to get home?’ Lizzie asked him, stepping away and tilting her head up a fraction to meet his gaze.
Aaron laughed. ‘Oh, you know, I thought I’d hitchhike back to Aldeburgh. There’s bound to be some lorries heading that way.’
‘Hey, doofus –’ Lizzie punched him on the arm ‘– I was being serious.’
Aaron sighed and ran a hand through the short waves of his brown hair. ‘I’m not eight-years-old anymore. I’m more than capable of using public transport, you know?’
Lizzie smiled. ‘I know, I know. but you’ll always be my little brother, no matter how old you are.’
It took another few minutes before the watch-tapping prompts from the man behind the check-in desk became too frequent to ignore.
As Aaron turned to leave he touched Jaddi’s arm and leaned closer. ‘Look after her.’
He had the same piercing blue eyes as Lizzie. They stared into hers with a fierceness she’d have expected from Lizzie’s father, not a cute eighteen-year-old with nothing but a bright future ahead of him.
‘You know I will.’ She smiled through the pang of guilt radiating out from the pit of her stomach. For the first time since she’d created the website, Jaddi wondered how much of what she’d done was for Lizzie, and how much of it was for herself.
Lizzie
Lizzie shifted position in the narrow chair, banging her elbow against the armrest and causing a sharp pain to shoot up her arm. She scrunched up the muscles in her face, rubbed her hand over her funny bone, or ulnar nerve, whatever it was, and wished she hadn’t accepted the window seat when Samantha and Jaddi had offered it to her.
She was also regretting her insistence that they travel economy. Her left foot had begun to tingle. Caroline had offered to book them First Class, but Lizzie had said no. She’d wanted to be like any other ordinary backpacker, squashed into cattle class seats and sleeping in shared rooms at cheap hostels. It was part of the experience. Lizzie wiggled her toes inside the red flight socks her mum had insisted she pack. The appeal of being ordinary was quickly wearing thin and they were only six hours into their journey.
Samantha and Jaddi slept motionless in the seats next to her, trapping her in her seat. She poked her head up and cast her eyes around the dim cabin of the aeroplane. She could see rows of heads slumped to one side, some with inflated cushions around their necks, others wearing headphones. Air stewards moved without a sound around the galley in the middle of the aircraft.
Lizzie reached for her travel bag, stashed under the seat in front of her. She pulled out the camera Ben had given her and opened the flap. The small screen glowed white in the darkness. A second later her face appeared.
What would they do if she didn’t bother with the diaries? Cancel the documentary? Cut her trip short? It seemed so personal – an intrusion into her thoughts, which she supposed was the point. Lizzie sighed and glanced around her. What difference did it make if she did it? It wasn’t as if she would ever have to watch them.
Lizzie held down the record button until a red dot appeared in the corner of the screen.
‘Hi,’ she whispered, looking into her own hollow eyes, staring back at her from the screen. She looked pale and gaunt in the illuminating glow from the camera. She tried a smile, but it only added to the ghost-like effect. ‘This is my first video diary. We’re currently on a night flight to Thailand. The time in the UK right now is almost three in the morning. Everyone is asleep.’ Lizzie smirked and turned the screen towards Samantha and Jaddi. ‘Including these two. Maybe I’d be asleep too if I’d had half a bottle of wine at take-off. Luckily for the viewers, and my parents, I can’t drink because of the anti-seizure medication I’m taking. So you will be spared any drunkenness. From me anyway.
‘I’m supposed to tell you how I feel. Well, I feel excited, and a little nervous. I’m not sure I really believe it’s happening yet. We’re finally going. First Thailand, then Cambodia, Vietnam, then onto Australia before we finish up in America. It’s a shorter trip than we first planned in our second year at uni, but I’m just so excited that we’re finally doing it. I can’t thank everyone enough who has helped me get here. I guess the countdown begins now: welcome to day one; eighty-nine to go.’
Lizzie stopped herself. She’d meant it to sound peppy, but the words that left her mouth rang of remorse. What else should she say?
Lizzie stared into the camera screen, her mind blank.
Then she smiled. ‘I’m OK, Mum. Truly I am, so no tears. That goes for you too, Dad. I’m with two amazing girls who I love so much, and with the exception of the tumour in my brainstem, I’m healthy. I feel great, in fact, and I can’t wait for this plane to land.’
Lizzie sensed a movement next to her, and closed the camera before dropping it back into her bag.
‘Are you really all right?’ Samantha sat up and stretched her arms up above her head. Tears glistened in her eyes.