the girl who’s restoring the garden for me, wants to have a go at sorting them out too. They even want me on the village committee.’
‘It might do you good,’ said his mum. ‘Give you something to focus on.’
‘That’s what Kezzie said,’ said Joel. ‘It turns out next year is the 140th anniversary of Edward Handford’s birth, and the Parish Council want to celebrate, and they seem keen to have a member of his family involved.’
‘And do you want to?’
‘I didn’t,’ admitted Joel. ‘I thought at first it wasn’t quite my thing, but since Kezzie and I found all the stuff in the attic – I did tell you about that didn’t I?’
‘You did,’ said his mum with a smile, ‘several times.’
‘Oh,’ said Joel, a little crestfallen, ‘sorry, I’ve probably been a bit overexcited about it.’
‘It’s lovely to see you so enthusiastic about something,’ said Mum. ‘Really, I’m pleased. And I’d love to see what you find out.’
‘So far, we’ve read some of the diaries and letters, and it looks as though before Connie was born, Edward and Lily lost a couple of babies. Which was very sad. And from what we can tell, Lily seems to have died fairly young. Do you know what she died of?’
‘I’m not sure,’ said Mum. ‘My mother said her parents never spoke of it. I asked Connie once, and she went very quiet and said something about some things being better left alone. I’m amazed that you found all that paperwork. I wonder why she kept it.’
‘I really feel for Edward,’ said Joel. ‘It sounds daft, but he was left all alone in that big, old house, just like I’ve been. I really want to bring both the house and garden back to life.’
‘Well then,’ said his mum, ‘I think you should, don’t you?’
Kezzie was on a train to London. She was still debating the wisdom of this, but she’d felt so lonely on Friday night, she found herself looking up all her friends on Facebook. She’d deliberately kept off it since she’d been in Heartsease, but once she had logged on, there were so many messages from people she felt quite teary.
Kez, where are you???? Flick had posted on her wall over a month ago, and then again, KEZ what’s up? No one’s seen you. Please don’t be dead.
Kezzie hadn’t been able to resist, responding:
Hi Flick. No. Not dead. Having some time out.
Where are you? came the instant response.
Do you live on FB? typed Kezzie. Why don’t you go out and get a real life?
Cos my virtual one’s such fun, retorted Flick. But seriously. Where are you? How are you? Am worried, honx
I’m fine, typed Kezzie. But I do miss you.
Well, what are you waiting for? wrote Flick. Come and see us. What are you doing tomorrow night? There’s a band on at the Liberty and a crowd of us going. Why don’t you come? You could crash with us.
I’ll think about it, wrote Kezzie, but she knew she didn’t have to think about it at all. She was enjoying her new life in Heartsease, but she missed her old life in London. And it wasn’t just Richard she was missing; she was missing her friends too.
So Saturday morning found her on a train up to London. Her decision was so spontaneous, she hadn’t got round to telling anyone where she was going. Although, who would she tell, apart from Lauren or Joel? She didn’t know anyone else.
It seemed weird coming up to London after all these weeks away. She watched the countryside gradually flee away as the train sped through Sussex villages, and gradually raced towards more built up urban centres. After weeks of seeing hills, and trees, and sheep, it was a sudden shock to be rattling through council estates, back gardens, and fox cubs playing by the railway side. London seemed dirtier than she remembered, as the train crept slowly into Waterloo and the station itself seemed frantic and busy. Did people always rush this much in London? Had she, when she lived here? It was nice, she realized, taking things a little more slowly.
It took an hour and a half to get over to Flick and Gavin’s flat in Walthamstow. The flat itself was lovely and cosy. But the road it was on was grim, with a towering estate looming ominously on the other side of the road. Kezzie grinned. She had fond memories of that estate. She, Flick and Gavin had started out planting a few bedding plants there, and although at first the local kids had pulled them up, in the end some of them had got interested in what Kezzie and her friends were doing. With some help and enthusiasm from their local community centre, the kids had ended up creating their own little garden. Kezzie still felt proud of that.
‘Kez! You’re here.’ Flick threw her arms round Kezzie, and gave her an enormous hug. ‘Tell me, where have you been? What’s been going on?’
‘It was just London, Richard, everything,’ said Kezzie. ‘I needed to get away.’
‘But you could have told me where you were going,’ scolded Flick.
‘I know, I’m sorry,’ said Kezzie. ‘Things all felt a bit mad here, and then my Aunt Jo offered me a place to stay in the country, and it seemed like the right thing to do.’
‘You’re living in the country?’ Flick roared with laughter. ‘What a hoot. Did you hear that, Gav?’
‘I think most of London heard it,’ said Gavin, who was also known as Space Cadet on account of him being not very with it a lot of the time. He was sitting at their rackety kitchen table, rolling a joint. ‘Hey, Kez, great to see you. There’s a whole crowd of us going out tonight. Should be a blast.’
And it was. After a bite to eat, the three of them strolled down the road to the local pub, the Three Compasses, where Kezzie had spent many a happy evening. She soon slipped back into things. Flick and Gavin had gathered a crowd together, some of whom she knew, Tom who’d come on lots of night-time expeditions with them, and Karen and Dan who lived down the road, as well as several she didn’t. It was fun, and Kezzie was enjoying herself so much by the time they got to the gig, she allowed herself to be persuaded to have a puff of Gavin’s spliff.
‘I shouldn’t really,’ she said. ‘I decided to give it up.’
‘Oh, come on, don’t be a party pooper,’ said Flick, who was well away by now, ‘what harm can one little puff do?’
‘A lot,’ said Kezzie, with feeling.
‘What do you mean?’ asked Flick. Overwhelmed suddenly at being with people she loved, who loved her, and who knew Richard, Kezzie couldn’t contain herself any longer. She’d spent so long hugging her secret to herself, the words came spilling out of her.
‘The thing is, oh God, Flick, I’ve been such an idiot,’ she said. ‘I knew Rich hated me smoking dope. One of the few things we used to argue about was that he thought I could be feckless sometimes, incapable of taking responsibility. I wanted to prove him wrong, but instead I stuffed up big time.’
‘Woah,’ said Flick, raising her hand. ‘Slow down. What on earth did you do?’
Kezzie put her head in her hands, and then sat up and looked straight ahead.
‘You know we were going to move in together?’ she said.
‘Yes, so?’ said Flick.
‘Well, I offered to have Emily at my place for the afternoon, when Richard was going to be late at work. I knew he was worried about how we got on and that Emily was a bit wary of me, and I thought we could get to know each other a bit better. Stupidly, I thought we might bond a bit better away from Richard’s flat.’
‘And?’
‘It was a disaster,’ said Kezzie. ‘Emily was bitchy to me from the minute she arrived. I tried to engage her in polite conversation, I tried to find out what she was interested in, and she was