poke better than any other, and so I denied it. “Why don’t you do to me what you do to she then?” “What is that?” “You knows.” “No.” “Yes you do.” “I feel it like this.” “More than that.” “What?” “You know.” “I don’t, tell me.” There was a pause. It came into my head that she knew I had licked Martha’s quim, and it had such an effect on me, that down went my doodle, and I was almost ashamed to look at her; for as said, until I licked Martha, I had never done such an act, and did it with a sort of belief that I was a great beast, and should have said so of any man who did anything of the sort. Indeed after spending in her mouth, I had felt so very much disgusted with myself, that I left off the licking altogether, and had made the girl promise she would never tell her sister, nor refer to the matter again. So I was silent, standing with one hand on her belly just above her split, and in an uncomfortable state of mind.
She broke the silence. “Do it as you do it to she.” “I don’t know what you mean,” I again stammered. “Yes yer do now.” “What has Martha told you?” “Nothing, but I knows.” And finding I was about to get on the bed, “Naw, naw, kiss it.” So I put my mouth down on to the hair and gave a loud kiss. “Naw,” said she, “do it as you do it to she, I am a finer woman than she by long chalks; what is’t yer sees to take to her so? you knows you tickles her with yer tongue.” The murder was out. I wanted to mount her, she baulked me, and kept repeating in a jockular, playful, manner her request. So I got her to the side of the bed, her large thighs wide open, and legs hanging down in a favorable position, intending to please her; she gave her cunt a dry rub with her chemise.
I began with dislike, but there was something in the novelty which warmed me. What a difference between her and her sister. I could lick the younger one’s all but hairless orifice with comfort, and she always laid quiet; but I had to pull open this one’s sausage lips and hold back the dark thick fringe, which got into my eyes and tickled my nose. No sooner had my tongue touched her clitoris, than the lips closed round my mouth, and as my saliva worked up on to the cunt-hair by her movement, it wetted my nose and face, she heaved and bounced her arse so much. Then her thighs closed round my head tightly enough to squeeze it off, she buried her hands in the hair of my head, and up went cunt again, bringing my nose into the hole, then with a jerk she got her cunt away from me. I was not at all sorry to desist.
“Oh! do it natural,—do it natural,” said she, and her thighs opened and hung down, showing a slobbered cunt. I went into her just as she lay at the side of the bed, and in a minute her cunt was wetter than ever.
I have no doubt that the wench spent almost directly I licked her, but I did not know it. When I asked her if she liked it, she said, “The old fashioned way be the best, but I have done the same as she.” I questioned her, but never knew whether her sister had told her or not, or whether she had peeped and seen us together at it.
I made her promise she would never tell her sister what I had done. She hoped I would see her again, but having promised Martha that I would not have Sarah again, told her so. She said she was tired of watching for us. The sisters were often quarrelling, and I believe out of jealousy about me, yet I fucked her again.
I may mention about the risks I ran, that I was once with Martha on the bed, when I heard my cousin’s voice asking Sarah who was at the door, if she had seen me pass.
I could not get the younger readily enough, had been long from home, and was about returning. I had spent all my money, and told Sarah one day after I had poked her, that I was going away. Her sister was then at the mill. Said she, “What will Martha do?” I supposed she would get another sweetheart. She shook her head, “Martha be poisoned.” “What?” “Don’t be afraid,” said she, “she be in the family way, we call it poisoned in these parts, when a girl be’nt married.” It was true. The girl had only menstruated once or twice before I first had her, and now her courses had stopped. There was no attempt at making a market of me, all needed was to get her right again. The elder took Martha to a fortune-teller, and she got better of her difficulty. I borrowed money of my aunt and giving Martha all I could, went back to London. She left the neighbourhood.
I saw Martha two years afterwards, when visiting again my aunt; she was in house-hold service, and was out for the day. I waylaid her, hoping to have her again; we kissed and fondled, and with difficulty I felt her quim, but could not accomplish my wishes; she was going to be married, and soon after I heard that she was.
Sarah also was going to be married to a farm labourer, and when I joked her about his finding her out, she laughed and said, “Lord, he war my first sweetheart,” from which I inferred that cousin Fred was mistaken about taking her virginity.
My first cunt-licking, and cock-sucking took place with Martha; I had never before played such amatory pranks, and all came about by instinct. For a long time I was ashamed of myself, and never breathed a word on such subjects to anyone; I don’t think I should have done so even to Fred, but he was then away. Gradually I was learning by instinct the whole art of love. What made me offer money to get Martha I can’t say, I don’t think that I had ever heard of tempting women’s virtue by money, but I never forgot the lesson, and much improved on it as time went on.
I now had had four women. The difficulties in the way of getting at them, were very useful in preventing excesses; and kept me in health. It seems surprising to me now, how little I seemed to have thought of baudy attitudes, and lascivious varieties; for belly-to-belly poking on the bed, was nearly all I did. I had still the modest, demure, demeanour which deceived my mother (coupled with her ignorance of life generally) and relations, and though very proud of my achievements, kept them much to myself, never disclosing the names of my women, and only telling one or two intimate friends of what I had done; who reciprocated by telling me their achievements. Fucking had eased my prepuce. I made a practice of pulling it backward and forward several times a day; in fact whenever I piddled. My prick had grown bigger in the two years, which pleased me much, but about the size of it I had a curious doubt, which will be told of further on.
I was though demure, quite a man in manner and looks, and with women behaved in a way which one or two of my relatives remarked. I used to think to myself when talking to them, “Ah! I know what sort of opening you have at the bottom of your belly.” The cousins whose cunts I had had a partial glimpse of, I used to like to dance with, wondering how much the hair had grown on them. I used also to think about my sister’s cunt that I had seen when in the cradle, but just then she died. My experience indeed much increased the charm of female society to me.
Chance had given me two virgins out of four women, that was a luxury unthought of, uncared for, and in no way appreciated; the virgins were no more liked by me than the others.
Cousin Fred will appear at less frequent intervals, he was away sometimes for months, then for years, but he is named whenever he played an important part in my adventures,—he was participator in others which will never be written about here.
CHAPTER VIII.
Fanny Hill.—Masturbation.—Friend Henry.—Under street-gratings at the gunmaker’s.—A frigging match.—Sights from below.—In a back street.—A prick in petticoats.—Evacuations.—Ladies scared.
I went back to London, and resumed my preparations. Penniless, I tried to get money from my mother, but could not. I tried to feel our ugly housemaid, who threatened to tell. Just then a friend lent me Fanny Hill, how well I recollect that day, it was a sunshiny afternoon, I devoured the book and its luscious pictures, and although I never contemplated masturbation, lost all command of myself, frigged, and spent over a picture as it lay before me. I did not know how to clean the book and the table-cover.
Fascinated although annoyed with myself, I repeated the act till not a drop of sperm would come; and the skin of my prick was sore. The next day I had a splitting headache but read at intervals, and again frigged; and did this for a week, till my eyes were all but dropping into my head. In a fever and worn out; the doctor said I was growing too fast, and ordered strong nourishment; but I used to take the infernal book with me to bed, and lay reading it, twiddling my prick, and fearing to