Una ignored him. She arranged her plastic animals. She was proud of them. Blue lions with curled tails. Orange long-necked giraffes. A red rhinoceros with a horn so sharp she wanted to poke Gabriel in the eye just to make him squeal. Pink elephants with S-shaped trunks. But she was missing something. She frowned. She needed a green monkey for her collection. Un chango verde. Da me lo. Just like your mother, squawking Spanglish.
She wondered who’d said that.
She had had too much to drink she did not feel good at all she should go home. She watched a tray full of drinks float by and on an elaborate daiquiri glass sipped a lime green monkey. She watched it float by and after a moment realized that was exactly what she needed what the fuck! She knew what she would do. She would find out who was drinking that. She would ask them pretty please can I have your monkey? That was a good idea. She nodded. She would ask sweetly. It worked every time. A pretty girl who asks sweetly always gets what she wants.
Across the table from her Gabriel sulked. He looked at her and said, What?
He faded in and out of focus. What what? asked Una. She stared at him as if he were a museum exhibit, a caveman in a natural history diorama: El Pescador Último. He was so handsome and such a fucker. A handsome fucker. Where did that monkey go?
What did you say? asked Gabriel.
Me? Una turned and stared behind her, then shook her head. I don’t know. She shouted to be heard over the tumult of the bar.
A waitress walked through the crowd calling out in a singsong voice, Last call for alcohol!
I don’t think I said anything. What do you think I said?
Gabriel hunched over the table. You said something.
No I didn’t.
I saw you.
You saw me say something? she shouted.
I saw you, Gabriel insisted. You nodded.
Una waved him away with one hand, as if he were nothing more than a horsefly at the beach. You don’t know what you’re talking about. She got up from the table, her legs wobbly. Before she left the booth she leaned across and hissed in Gabriel’s face, You’re a handsome fucker, you know that? But you don’t know shit.
Gabriel frowned. Don’t talk like that, baby. That’s not you.
I’m sorry, said Una. I think I need another drink. She stood up as if to head for the bar.
Maybe you’ve had enough, said Gabriel.
She looked at him for a moment. She said, And maybe I haven’t.
Una.
What? I’m not doing anything. Wait. Wait a second. I’ll be right back. I have to go find that monkey.
Gabriel said something she didn’t hear clearly.
What? Una leaned closer. What was that?
Save the last dance for me, he said. Gabriel wasn’t smiling. His words smelled of a veiled threat, a command to be followed.
Una leaned away from him, took a gulp from her margarita. That’s not what I thought you said.
What did you think I said?
She set her glass down sloppily, almost tipped over the table. I thought you said Save the lap dance for me. She laughed. Get it? Her eyes went big. My monkey! Where’s my monkey! I have to find that monkey!
She lurched into the crowd. A funhouse world undulated beneath her on the Tilt-a-Whirl floor. She tripped and stumbled. A lunk with long sideburns picked her up and when he did she wrapped her arms around his neck and held him tight, clasping his neck as if it were the neck of a pony while riding bareback. Pony! she giggled.
He laughed. I think someone’s had too much to drink, he said.
A girl at their table pointed her beer bottle at Una. I know her. She works at the Black Tooth. She’s all right.
Una peered over the guy’s shoulder at the strange faces bobbing around the table. Do you have a green monkey? she asked. I need a green monkey.
What about the pony? asked the guy holding her.
Forget pony. I need my monkey. I saw it come this way? She nodded and closed her eyes as if she would fall asleep, curled against this stranger’s neck. I need it, she said. For my zoo.
Una cuddled closer to his neck. Pony, she whispered. She was dimly aware one of his hands was cupping her butt cheeks to hold her weight. It felt good. He was as solid as a tree. She heard Gabriel’s voice say, Get your hands off her.
The clamor of the crowded bar dimmed for a moment. People nearby turned to stare and grin, some stepping back a bit in case things got ugly.
Off who? asked her savior.
Off her. Off my girlfriend.
This your girlfriend? I don’t see any sign on her.
Pony, said Una aloud. Pony pony pony pony pony.
She doesn’t need a sign.
I don’t know about this. The drunken guy holding Una turned to the table of people he was with. What do y’all think?
The girl who knew Una looked at Gabriel and said, I think he’s had too much to drink, too. What we got here is a pair of drinking problems.
The whole table laughed. It was the same-old-same-old, a couple of drunks having a spat.
Then Gabriel reached out and swiped the drink glasses and beer bottles off the table. Glass shattered, ashtrays fell into girls’ laps, and one guy stumbled backward and fell on his ass in the confusion. Others jumped back and shouted.
From her angle propped against her savior’s neck, Una could see a girl who said, Now there’s no call for that.
Her savior said, The man is out of fucking control.
Gabriel took hold of Una’s wrist and started pulling her away. She felt the tugging and her arm stretched. A voice called, King? King, goddamnit. Goddamnit, King. Put the girl down and let these people alone. They got more troubles than we do. So let’s just stand aside and pretend this never happened. You’re going to get us thrown out, is what you’re going to do.
I’m not doing anything, said King. It’s closing anyway.
Una found herself back on her feet. Gabriel pulled her beside him and marched them through the crowd, people staring. In her ear he said, I’m going to get that big motherfucker if it’s the last thing I do.
Una tried to catch her breath. She told Gabriel to slow down.
I’m going to get that motherfucker, he said again.
Honey? Don’t. Really. I was just—
You were just what? he hissed. You were just going to leave me in a bar in the middle of fucking—
If you’d let me finish! she shouted. I just wanted a monkey for my zoo. If you wouldn’t always, I mean, slow down!
Una saw faces whirling by her in the crowd. Rubberneckers at a car wreck. She tugged her wrist and twisted her hand. Would you let go?
Gabriel hit the exit door with a sharp smack of his open palm and they stumbled into the parking lot, the light above them blinding their eyes, Una still fighting his grasp.
Get in the car, he said. Get in the car or I’m just going to leave you here, okay?
The humid air made Una want to wipe her face. She yanked her hand and said, Let me go! Would you let me go?
The heavyweight bouncer, Mr. Ice Machine, morphed out of the shadows and jabbed a wide hand in Gabriel’s chest. He looked like the kind of guy who would bite the head off a duck if he was dared to. He punched Gabriel with his open hand and said, Let the woman go, okay?
When Gabriel released her