Welcoming a New Brother or Sister Through Adoption. Arleta James

there are specific ways you can help us, we’ll let you know. Mostly, this is our problem. Your job is to be a kid.

      “What do you think about the changes that may happen? Let’s sit down and figure out the things we do as a family. Which of these are most important to you? We want to continue the ones most important to you, even if your sister takes up a lot of our time.”

      Chapter summary

       • Parents must determine when to tell the typical children about their adoption plans. This news is best delivered when mothers and fathers have committed to expanding their family via adoption.

       • Brothers’ and sisters’ need for information parallels that of their parents. Sharing knowledge among family members contributes to the adjustment of parents and all the sons and daughters. Education is the key to success for the family built by adoption.

       • Children—ages pre-school through adolescence—have life experiences. This knowledge can be utilized as a springboard to “family talks.” Parents take the lead in imparting learning on the resident kids. Parents initiate follow-up conversations as well. Extend plenty of opportunities for questions. Offer honest responses to your birth and/or previously adopted kids’ queries.

       • A menu of ways exists to help your children (and yourselves) prepare for the arrival of the new child. Devour each method of pre-adoption education. Your journey will be better if full of information!

       • Anticipate lots of questions from your resident sons and daughters. If your family composition includes an adoptee, a second, third, or fourth adoption will act as a trigger. That is, these kids will likely enter a process of rethinking the circumstances that led to their own adoption. Contemplate, in advance, the types of queries your sons and daughters might put forth. Formulate some responses.