I know it. But I’m on a mission. I am gonna hook me a real man.”
“A fine man,” I added, still thinking of Jordan and his sexy chocolate self. Lord knew my husband was a loser, but he was beyond fine.
“A nice man.”
“With a steady J-O-B. Don’t forget he gots to have a job.”
“No doubt, no doubt. And know how to romance me.”
“And make sure he don’t live with his mama.”
“And he gotta satisfy me in more ways than one. He gotta go downtown!” Kerri stood and danced provocatively as she sang. I nearly fell off the sofa with laughter.
“And no baby mama drama!” I reminded her.
“And no wives!”
“You gotta triple-check his ass when you find him.” I was almost drunk by now.
“Triple-check?”
“Credit check, criminal check, and medical check. You got to check his ass!” Tears were streaming down both of our faces and I had to pee by now. “I gotta get out of here. You got me drunk, and your ass still ain’t paid your rent.”
“I’ll figure something out. There’s a Mr. Just-For-Right-Now out there somewhere.” She sighed.
“What about Rodney?” I said, thinking if I hooked them up then he could help her out and she could pay.
“Uh, I don’t do criminals. I want my man to be legit. Besides, he’s too small for me, and Trina from down the block said he got a little-ass dick.” She winked.
“Men with little dicks have the best tongues. They make up for their shortcomings by giving us long cunnilingus.” I winked back.
“Forget it. I find the thugged-out thing sexy, but it’s not my style. I told you, I like my men big and legit.”
“What about Paul?”
“Paul, from across the hall?” She tilted her head in thought.
“What other Paul would I be talking about?”
“I don’t know, Katrice. He’s nice and all, but he tries too damn hard.”
“Didn’t you say at one time you liked a take-charge man?” I decided to push this issue because Paul always paid his rent, and if he couldn’t afford to pay it all, maybe he could afford to help Kerri pay some of her rent.
“But Paul?”
“I think you should talk to him and at least see where his head is at. Come on, Kerri, if you don’t come up with this money, we’re all gonna be homeless. At least try.”
“So you think I should pimp myself out to Paul for my rent money, Trice? What does that say about me?” She looked at me.
“You said yourself you had thought about it at one point. Just act on those thoughts.”
“No, I said I thought he was nice. I never said I wanted to fuck him,” she corrected me. “Besides, he can’t afford to keep me in the lifestyle I’m accustomed to.”
“What lifestyle is that? Lifestyles of the broke and evicted?” I asked her and opened the door to leave. Paul was unlocking the door to his apartment across the hall.
“Oh, hi, Paul. You sure keeping some late hours,” I said.
“Just taking the garbage out,” he replied. “How you ladies doing?”
“Just fine. Kerri and I were just talking about you.”
“For real? What about me?” He turned and looked past me at Kerri wearing the short kimono and holding her glass. I opened my eyes wide and nodded. She rolled her eyes and opened the door wider so he could get a better view.
“She asked me what type of men I liked and I told her I like my men big, like you.” She licked her lips and I took this as my cue to be on my way.
“Interesting,” was his only comment.
“Well, I’ll check y’all later. Handle your business, Ker. Peace, Paul.” I weaved past them, down the steps to my own apartment.
Jordan had not come home yet so I crawled into the bed and curled into a tight ball. I didn’t know what I was going to do. Even if Kerri came up with her money, the fiasco that Jordan had worked out with Rodney still created a hole that couldn’t be filled. I could see my brother Kevin now, smiling because he was right. I wasn’t responsible enough to take care of this building and all that it included. I could barely pay my car note, and that was a month behind, too.
“Katrice, you don’t know anything about real estate or property management. We should just sell the building, and you and Jordan can have a nice little nest egg to start off with,” Kevin told me at the reading of Daddy’s will.
“Daddy didn’t know anything about it either, and look how much he made off of it. He had faith enough in us to leave it to us, why can’t you?”
“Look, Trice, I am not trying to belittle you, or doubt you, for that matter. This is more responsibility than you can handle, and I am not gonna be the backbone for you with this one. I promise.”
“I don’t need you to be my backbone. That’s why I have a husband. That’s his job.” I glared at him.
“Jordan?” He laughed in my face. “You are gonna depend on Jordan to help you do this? Trice, I just got called two days ago because the car I co-signed for you guys is past due. Now you think you can pay the mortgage on a building?”
“The car note has been taken care of. There was a bank error, but now it’s corrected.” I didn’t tell him that the error had been that Jordan told me he put five hundred dollars in the checking account when he only put in two-seventy-five.
“Fine, Trice. You do your thing. But I am not gonna be responsible for whatever happens. I mean that.”
“Whatever, Kevin. I know what I’m doing.”
He was right. I wasn’t responsible enough, and Jordan sure as hell wasn’t no kind of backbone. The door squealed open as he tried to sneak in. He crept in the room and I could hear the jingling of his belt as he removed his pants. He went into the bathroom and brushed his teeth and gargled. Then, carefully, oh so carefully, he eased into bed. When he saw that I didn’t move, he snuggled against me and put his arm around my body like he did every night. I chose not to say anything because I was sleepy from the wine, exhaustion, and depression all rolled into one. I fell asleep with the building on my mind, my daddy in my heart, and tears on my pillow.
6
Paul
“So, Kerri, maybe we can have dinner sometime?” I wasn’t sure, but it looked like Katrice was giving me a hint to try and get with Kerri before she left. So I was gonna see where it went. “How about Red Lobster?”
“I don’t do Red Lobster, but you can take me to Legal Seafoods if you want.”
“Ah, I don’t know much about Legal Seafoods. What’s it like?”
“It’s expensive, Paul. Like me.” She smiled and it seemed like the entire hallway lit up. “Do you think you can afford a woman like me? A high maintenance woman?”
“Well, yeah, I think so. I mean, I like you, Kerri. I’d do whatever it takes to keep you happy.”
“Really? Well, I might keep you to that,” she teased. “Look, I have to check my calendar and I’ll get back to you about dinner, okay?”
“Yeah, sure, no problem. Let me know when you check your calendar.” I frowned. She was giving me the runaround just like usual. Damn, I shouldn’t have even asked her out. I picked up my trash and took a step towards the stairs.
“Hey,