sailors had stopped laughing but were now looking at Nicodemus with expectant grins, as if anticipating a punch line to a joke.
Nicodemus frowned at them. “Say the River Thief has requisites more specific than simple theft. If he must perpetrate extortion or embezzlement, he could become a god of the treasury and steal all the money nobles hide from tax collectors. Or perhaps the River Thief has a requisite for burglary or fraud, then it’s espionage for him. Your god could be stealing from Empress Vivian rather than from dingy river merchants. Think, and think hard, about everything the River Thief could do for his worshipers if he could dip into the imperial wealth or if he commanded a fraction of all the taxes in Ixos or the taxes in all three league kingdoms. I’m offering a chance for your god to shape the league’s destiny.”
The sailors had stopped smiling. One had gone back to playing aft lookout. The other two sailors were again staring at Nicodemus’s unseen interrogator. “You suggest that the River Thief should be enslaved in one of the regency’s pet divinity complexes?”
Nicodemus had known this question was coming. Usually it was asked just before a neodemon either converted or tried to expose Nicodemus’s internal organs to air. “Why would I suggest such a small prize?” he asked. “Joining an existing complex is for the neodemons who need the Sacred Regent’s protection. But it’s the other way around for the River Thief; the Sacred Regent needs protection from him. With the right go-between—namely me—you could name your terms. Or forget the regency entirely, we could go directly to the Council of Starfall and give your god a jurisdiction greater than this kingdom’s.”
Someone from the bow called out and one of the sailors hurried away. But what did his interrogator think? She would be the key to the River Thief. A moment passed in which only the creaking of boards and the lapping of water sounded. Then, at last, the interrogator said, “You must have a very high opinion of yourself, that you think you could achieve such a feat.”
“I have managed to get one or two things done in my youth. I could catch the right ears for you.”
“Skinmage,” his interrogator asked, her voice growing tense, “I begin to fear that you have not been completely forthcoming regarding who you are. That or you are a consummate lunatic. To whom am I speaking?”
“This is not that kind of conversation.”
“Are you fond of trying to reverse situations in which you are bound and censored with a knife point to your kidneys?”
Something cold and sharp press up against Nicodemus’s left flank. “I try not to make a habit out of it,” he replied with as much composure as he could muster. “But, truly, I can help the River Thief gain power beyond any previous. Even more importantly, I can offer him protection.”
The woman snorted. “No, I’m afraid that won’t work. The River Thief has no need to fear the Trimuril or Leandra Weal.” Her voice grew louder. “They have never found us, and they never will.”
Nicodemus waited a moment before speaking softly. “Your crew is listening, so perhaps you would let me whisper something to you.”
Nicodemus felt pressure on his sides and then heard his interrogator speaking close behind his head. “You have exactly one breath to convince me that I shouldn’t cut you into pieces small enough for the river fish to swallow.”
“It’s too late,” Nicodemus whispered. “You’ve swallowed poison bait.”
She was silent for a moment. “What do you mean?”
“Think about what I just offered so loudly. Who could make such an offer?”
“No one.”
“No one except Nicodemus Weal,” he said before belatedly adding, “Or his wife. If you do convert, don’t tell Francesca I forgot that part.”
“You’re mad as a monkey in heat.”
“You are the River Thief’s avatar, yes?” he asked.
Rather than answer him, she said, “You can’t be the Halcyon; we’ve had reports that Nicodemus Weal went after a brigand goddess to the east of Chandralu nearly thirty days ago. There’s been no word that he came back.”
“Where do you get such information?” Nicodemus asked. “Tell me and I could make things even easier for you.”
His interrogator said nothing.
“Do you have an informant among my daughter’s officers? Is one of them in your purse? Is that how you have been avoiding Leandra?”
“Lies,” the woman said faintly.
Nicodemus continued. “I needed you and your men to hear what I had to say. It was my only chance of saving the River Thief. Unless he converts, you and your crew will die. Then I will find your god and deconstruct him into stray punctuation. You are his avatar, yes? You need to let me speak to him.”
His interrogator sniffed and muttered “him” under her breath. Suddenly Nicodemus recognized in her voice a peculiar kind of annoyance. Nicodemus’s gut clenched. “Oh … bloody burning hell!”
“What?”
“I’ve been a complete … ass.”
“Just when I begin to believe I should take you seriously, you say something completely insane.”
“I just realized why you are not taking me seriously.”
“Because you keep saying completely insane things?”
“Because the reports I received in Chandralu described the River Thief as a water god, and I believed them.”
The interrogator was silent.
“You are not an avatar?”
“What makes you say that?”
“The River Thief isn’t a water god. She’s a water goddess. You are the River Thief.”
There was a short pause. “At least you are not the stupidest man I have ever met. But I can’t say that’s much of a compliment.”
“Goddess, please forgive me. You are clearly a subtle deity, one that would be a great boon to the league. But if you remain a neodemon, I have no choice but to bring you down.”
“Try to bring me down.”
“I wouldn’t let you capture me if I couldn’t ensure my safety. What’s more you’re not a fighting deity; you’ve gotten by all these years by concealment.”
She didn’t reply.
“And you’re brave,” Nicodemus added. “When confronted with their possible death, most deities bluster. It’s one of the downsides of immortality, I think.”
“Downsides, mortal? I am the one who has you upside down and censored.”
“Do you think that will help you survive?”
A long pause. “Not if you’re telling me the truth, Nicodemus Weal.”
“I am. Now, help me to save you. What are your requisites? How can I help you thrive in the league?”
The goddess’s voice sounded slightly sad. “There can be no place for me in the league, or anywhere where humans rule.”
Nicodemus snorted. “Don’t be dramatic. Any deity can live within the league, especially here on Ixos.” He paused. “Though I suppose any deity incarnated on this continent could live free. But you are a neodemon, not a demon.”
There was no reply.
“Goddess, you do not seriously mean to tell me that you crossed the great ocean, that you’re a demon of the Ancient Continent?”
Still no reply.
“You’re bluffing,” Nicodemus insisted, though he felt a twinge of fear. “You can’t expect me