a doctor really sucked.
He indicated to Andrea to turn the lights back on. ‘Page the social worker,’ he whispered to her as she passed him.
‘Hillary, Danny,’ he said, turning to them. ‘I’m sorry to have to tell you this but we’ve just looked at your baby’s heart and it’s not beating. I’m sorry, but your baby has died.’
Hillary’s face crumpled into a heap as she clutched at her husband’s shirt. ‘No, no, no,’ she wailed. ‘My baby, my baby.’
‘What do you mean, dead? How can that be? What happened?’ Danny demanded, his voice loud with anger and indignation.
‘I don’t know for sure,’ said Campbell quietly. ‘I’d like Darren to have a really good look and see if he can find the cause … if that’s OK.’
‘Do it,’ said Danny, Hillary’s sobs and cries of denial stimulating his aggression further.
Darren applied the transducer again and did a thorough ultrasound scan, looking for a reason for this tragic intra-uterine death. Hillary’s sobs echoed around the room during the procedure.
Darren stopped and pushed a few buttons. ‘There’s no blood flow through the cord,’ he said solemnly. ‘There …’ He pointed. ‘I think that’s the problem.’
‘Is that a knot in the cord?’ asked Campbell.
‘I think so—it’s kind of hard to tell. Might just be a lump but, given that there’s no flow, I’d say it’s probably a true knot. The cord is quite long, which does increase the risk.’
Darren wiped Hillary’s belly off and left the room. Andrea returned with Sharon, the social worker, and Campbell introduced her to the grieving couple.
‘Did you find anything?’ Danny asked, the angry edge to his voice dissipating as reality settled in.
‘We think that there’s a knot in the cord. We can’t be certain until after the baby is born—’
‘A knot? How can that happen?’ Danny was angry again, his voice incredulous and demanding.
Campbell didn’t take offence. The man had just had the rug pulled out from underneath him. Beneath Danny’s veneer of aggression was a grief-stricken father. Campbell would feel the same way if it had been him.
‘It’s very rare but some babies can be so active that they can swim around in the womb and tie a knot in their cord. If it pulls tight enough, it can completely deprive the baby of nutrients from the placenta and they die.’
‘I didn’t think there was enough room at this stage for that,’ said Danny.
‘At this stage there isn’t. It probably happened weeks ago, and the knot has been pulling tighter and tighter over the last few weeks as the baby grew more and there was less room to move.’
‘Oh, God! I should have come in earlier,’ sobbed Hillary. ‘If only I hadn’t been so busy … I should have been paying more attention.’ Tears streamed down her face.
‘It’s not your fault, love,’ Danny said gruffly, hugging her close, stroking her hair.
‘He’s right, Hillary. Cord knots are completely out of anyone’s control. It was a freak accident. The baby probably died some time in the night. You did say the last time you felt it move was last night?’
‘Yes, it was moving as I drifted off to sleep,’ she sniffed.
‘You weren’t to know. Coming in earlier would have made no difference.’
Hillary’s gut-wrenching sobs filled the room again and Campbell allowed them time to vent their grief. His skin puckered with goose-bumps as Hillary’s wailing displayed her utter devastation. Campbell’s heart went out to them. What did you say in this kind of a situation? He felt so helpless.
‘What happens now?’ asked Danny, wiping his tears and blowing his nose.
‘We induce the pregnancy and Hillary will give birth to the baby. We don’t have to rush into this. If you want time to think about everything, we could leave that till the morning.’
‘Oh, God.’ Hillary broke into loud sobs again.
‘I’m so sorry, I wish I could have given you better news,’ said Campbell, feeling wretched. ‘I’m going to leave you now for a while and let you speak to our social worker. I’m going to be out at the desk if you need me for anything. I’ll come and talk to you again after you’ve finished with Sharon.’
Campbell wandered to the nurses’ station and sat down. His heart was heavy with the tragedy that had just unfolded. He’d give anything to not be here right now. To not have met this couple under these dreadful circumstances.
He’d have given anything to be at home with Claire. He needed her more now than he ever had. Just to feel the comfort and solace of her arms, to forget the awfulness of the day in the magic of her lips and the secrets of her body. To be held by the woman he loved.
Campbell used this time to write a thorough report in Hillary’s notes. He documented everything from the beginning, including the ultrasound images that Darren had printed out for him. Such a waste, he thought as he signed the chart. So unfair!
‘Campbell.’ Sharon interrupted his thoughts.
‘How are they?’ Stupid question.
‘No different from before. Devastated. They wanted me to ask you if you would perform a Caesar as soon as possible. Hillary doesn’t want to be induced. She was booked for an elective Caesar with Martin anyway. I really think psychologically she wouldn’t cope with waiting until the morning. She keeps saying she can’t bear the thought of her baby being dead inside her. She wants to be able to hold it.’
‘I’ll go and talk to them. Thanks, Sharon.’
Campbell approached the room reluctantly. He didn’t want to intrude on their grief. It was tragic enough for Hillary and Danny, without being forced to share such a personal time in their lives with people who were basically strangers. Even the intimacy of their grief wasn’t sacred.
They looked up when Campbell entered. The soul-destroying cries had dissipated, replaced by expressions of utter disbelief and misery.
‘Sharon said you’d like a C-section?’
Hillary nodded, her chin wobbling. ‘She can’t go through hours of labour to give birth to a dead baby, Doc. She just can’t,’ pleaded Danny.
‘I can’t do that, Campbell,’ Hillary confirmed, tears coursing down her face.
‘I understand,’ Campbell reassured them gently. ‘Are you sure you don’t need more time? There really is no rush.’
‘I want to be able to hold my baby,’ Hillary cried. ‘I don’t want to wait. I want it to be over.’
‘I’ll arrange it immediately. I’ll see you in Theatre in about half an hour.’
Andrea rang up to the operating rooms to check the emergency theatre wasn’t in use, while Campbell made his way up there. He did so with a heavy heart. This would be no joyous event, like most Caesareans. There would be no lusty wail to bring a tear to the eye. Instead, he would have to pull out a stillborn baby. It was too sad for words.
The operation went without a hitch. Campbell felt profound sadness as he handed the lifeless baby boy to a waiting nurse. He knew they would wash the baby and dress him and have him ready to take to his parents when Hillary got out of Theatre. They would be able to hold their baby at last.
Removing the placenta was interesting as he was able to examine the cord close up. Sure enough, it was a true knot. He’s never seen one in all the years he’d been in obstetrics.
Sometimes cords had a lumpy appearance, similar to a knot on a tree-trunk, but this one was a definite knot. He untied it to prove it to himself and so he