came over. Lacey made them peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches for lunch, and then they returned to building stuff in the living room. As Lacey wiped the counter, she heard banging. And it was close. He wouldn’t!
She ran outside and pushed on the gate, but it wouldn’t budge. She used her body and shoved with all her might, and still the gate wouldn’t move. Damn him! She wasn’t going to let Gabe get away with this.
Back in the house, she hollered to the kids, “I’m going outside.”
“’Kay,” Emma shouted back.
Lacey went into the garage and found a hammer. Then she grabbed the kitchen stool that was still by the car and marched around to the fence between Gabe’s and their house. She stepped up on the ladder and then vaulted over. Misjudging the height, she landed on her butt. She was winded for a moment, but she still had the hammer in her hand.
Getting to her feet, she took a long breath and marched to the gate. A large board was nailed across it. She tried to pry it away with the hammer, but she wasn’t strong enough. Damn! She kicked at the gate. Frustrated, she sank to the ground with her back against it.
“What are you doing?”
She looked up into the brooding eyes of the dark knight. Every time she looked at his sad face, she wanted to apologize or try to make him feel better, like she did Emma. But sometimes there was no way to make things better.
She staggered to her feet. “I was trying to pry the board away, but you nailed it securely. I hope you’re happy.”
Gabe just stared at her, his dark eyes orbs of never-ending sadness.
“She’s a little girl and she doesn’t understand. And I don’t understand how you can be so cruel. How would you feel if someone had done this to your son?”
He turned as white as the fluffy clouds over his head, and Lacey thought he was going to pass out. Still, she wasn’t in a relenting mood.
“If it makes you happy to keep the gate closed and us out, then by all means leave it nailed up. One day you’re going to have to face the outside world and maybe even have to explain how you could hurt a six-year-old child. Your son would be so disappointed in you. Emma’s made a connection to you and Pepper, but I will do my damnedest to keep her away. So be happy, Mr. Gabe Garrison. You just secured your privacy.”
After saying that, she marched back to the fence and realized there was no way to get over it without the stool, which was on the other side.
Not willing to lose face, she stormed around his house and to the double gates on the other side. Stomping across his front yard, she realized she still had the hammer in her hand. What had she done? She’d traumatized a man who was barely hanging on emotionally.
Placing the hammer back in her father’s toolbox, she knew she had to apologize. Later, though, when she wasn’t fuming.
Gabe was so locked within himself he probably hadn’t even heard what she’d said. She’d take time to cool off and then she would try to make amends. If that was possible.
She was so tired of dealing with grief and pain that she wanted to scream. There had to be a glimmer of happiness somewhere, and she intended to find it for Emma. And for herself.
But for Gabe, happiness was in his rearview mirror. And the road ahead was strewn with heartache and pain. Hope was something he didn’t even want or desire. Inside, he was already as dead as his son.
Gabe walked into his house and sat at the kitchen table, Pepper curled at his feet. The woman had some nerve. She didn’t even know Zack or him. He looked up to stare at a photo of his son.
How would you feel if someone had done this to your child?
Don’t think.
But his feelings bubbled to the surface. He would be as mad as hell. He ran his hands over his face and a tortured sigh escaped. He would have protected his son with his dying breath, except that when his son had needed him the most, Gabe hadn’t been there. He’d failed his son. He’d failed to teach him how important it was to follow rules. He’d failed to discipline him. That was all on Gabe’s shoulders. Gabe was the reason Zack was dead.
Another tortured sigh erupted from his throat.
Pepper whined and Gabe reached down to pat her. As he did, he saw his reflection in the glass on the stove. He didn’t recognize himself. He touched his bearded face. When was the last time he’d shaved? Or showered? Or had gotten a haircut? He couldn’t remember.
Your son would be so disappointed in you.
The woman was right. He recognized that somewhere in the frozen region of his mind. Zack wouldn’t approve of him giving up and living his days in regret. But what else could he do? He had no reason to live anymore, but he didn’t have the nerve to take his own life. He would never do that. It went against everything he believed in. So he continued to live in a hell of his own making.
One crazy woman was putting doubts in his head. Ignore her, he told himself. But he looked at the photo of his smiling son and knew he couldn’t continue to live like this. Zack was gone and he couldn’t hurt another child. But he could make things right.
* * *
IT TOOK LACEY about thirty minutes to calm down. Emma and Jimmy continued to play with the Legos and she made them a snack. Afterward, Emma wanted to know if they could go outside and play. Lacey hesitated, but Emma would find out soon enough about the gate. Lacey just had to be ready to explain.
She watched from the window while the kids chased each other and then played with a soccer ball, kicking it. Not once did Emma go to the gate, and Lacey was grateful for a little more time. Sharon called and Jimmy went home.
Not wanting to go to the diner again, Lacey made hot dogs and they had store-packaged pudding for dessert. She had to do better than this.
Emma took her bath and then curled up on the sofa to watch How the Grinch Stole Christmas.
Lacey couldn’t get Gabe off her mind.
“Sweetie, I’m going outside just for a minute. I’ll be right back.”
“’Kay.” Emma was already engrossed in the movie.
Lacey went through the garage and walked to Gabe’s front door. She rang the bell and waited. After a moment, he opened it.
She could only stare. He’d shaved, and his long hair was slicked back as if he’d just gotten out of the shower. He wore jeans and a black T-shirt and his feet were bare. Raw masculinity seemed to reach out and touch her. She swallowed hard.
“Did you want something?” he asked, his voice wrapping around her in a soothing sensation.
“Um...”
He lifted a dark eyebrow, and his eyes were heated with an emotion she couldn’t describe. It wasn’t anger this time. Could it be regret?
“Did you want something?” he repeated.
She cleared her throat. “Yes. I want to apologize for what I said earlier. I was completely out of line mentioning your son.”
He inclined his head, as if that was a response.
Taking a couple steps backward, she turned and walked to her house. She’d never met anyone like Gabe before. He used a bare minimum of words, and she found that odd for a man who was a lawyer—or who had been one.
Once in her garage, she took a couple of deep breaths before joining Emma to watch the rest of the movie. But the movie went right by her as thoughts of Gabe filled her head. He cleaned up better than anyone she’d ever known. He was handsome with a rugged, masculine appeal that made her pulse skitter with awareness.
She’d had a boyfriend in Austin, and they had been serious until her father