ignored her question. “Still, you surely love those boys. That’s plain. Plus, you brung them all the way out here. That’s gotta count for something.”
Alice continued to stare at the spotless carpet, thinking of what he’d said before leaving her behind. It would not work between us. No future. Those words collided with the ones he had spoken to her only days ago. Alice twisted the lace that protruded beyond her fawn-colored cashmere bodice.
“He kissed me at the ranch,” she said, touching her fingers to her bottom lip.
Mrs. Pellet’s brow lifted. “That so? Suppose he wants you but just can’t figure how to make that happen. Maybe you can think of something. Those little boys sure need a mother. And likely he can’t picture you keeping house.”
“He already alluded to that. Laughed, actually.”
A smile flickered on the landlady’s lips, but she tamed it and met Alice’s earnest stare. “No, Miss Truett, you sure are not cut from broadcloth. Satin and lace, real French lace, maybe.”
“And why should my attire be of concern?”
“Roach is an ordinary man. A good man, and that’s rare enough, but he’s ordinary in his roots.” Mrs. Pellet lifted one eyebrow at her in speculation. “If you want him to see you as ordinary, you got to act ordinary.”
“How?”
“Start with that hairstyle and your fancy clothes. Stop using words like alluded and attire.”
“I see.”
“You want him to forget you’re a lady? See you as a wife? Then you’ve got to show him you can tend those boys. And that underneath all those petticoats you’re a flesh-and-blood woman.”
* * *
Dillen looked surprised to see Alice seated at Mrs. Pellet’s table. Would he have come to see her and the boys if they were not invited to share Sunday supper?
She felt a new tension between them as they took their places at the table. Dillen seemed distracted. Had he also lost sleep over his decision to ask his employer if she and the boys could stay on his property?
She straightened as something occurred to her. Could Mr. Harvey dismiss Dillen over such a thing?
Mrs. Pellet had seated Alice beside Dillen, something that would never have occurred at her mother’s table. Cody also sat next to Dillen, who helped him carve up his ham. Did Dillen realize he had the same easy confidence with the boys as Mrs. Pellet had with hers? Colin sat to Alice’s right and only spilled his milk once and was not the only child to do so, much to her relief.
The table was so crowded and the exchanges so lively that Alice had trouble following the discussions. She’d never seen such a raucous, happy family. The quiet conversation of her own family’s dinners quite paled by comparison. Alice thought of returning to their table and of all the years and years of sitting in that quiet room. It frightened her more than any challenge she might face at the ranch. She could do this, because the alternative was returning to her parents’ home permanently.
She had to remind herself that Dillen had only agreed to let her stay for the boys’ sake, not for his.
In all the commotion, no one noticed when Dillen’s leg lolled against hers. She straightened, and then remembered Mrs. Pellet’s words. Make him see her as an ordinary woman. But how did she do that? She glanced across the table at Lizzy and Tommy, seeing them holding hands. Alice moved her hand from her napkin and reached until her fingers brushed Dillen’s muscular thigh. This time it was Dillen who straightened. Then he turned to her and smiled, but his eyes blazed with heat. A moment later his hand covered hers.
The boys remembered their manners and thanked their hostess before their departure. Dillen helped Alice on with her fur coat and walked them to the hotel. There he hesitated outside the entrance. Was he thinking of kissing her good-night?
Oh, she hoped so.
Alice glanced nervously about and then saw the boys shifting from side to side, anxious no doubt to be out of the cold.
“I hope we hear one way or the other real soon,” he said. Then he touched the brim of his hat and turned to go. Alice had to resist the urge to call after him.
Instead she took the boys inside and retreated to their hotel room. That night, when she lay in bed, her head filled with possible ways to get Dillen to recognize her as capable and also approachable. Mrs. Pellet said to show Dillen that beneath her petticoats she was a flesh-and-blood woman. Did Mrs. Pellet mean what Alice thought she meant? She flushed at the possibility and felt a nervous, gnawing worry that if she made some advance, Dillen might rebuff her soundly. But then she recalled his hand covering hers. It gave her hope.
If she could show him that she could see to the boys and live a simpler life, would that make him want her again?
On Monday, Lizzy found Alice and the boys at breakfast and told her that her Tommy had set off for the ranch to deliver Mr. Harvey’s answer to Dillen’s wire.
“He said yes.” She beamed and clapped her hands.
Alice now had the experience of getting what she wanted and being frightened half to death. Could she do it? Could she care for them all on her own out there in the wilderness?
What if they got hurt or sick?
She glanced at the boys, who looked to her with anxious expressions. She plastered a confident smile on her lips and nodded.
“Well, that is very good news, Lizzy. Thank you for the information.”
After breakfast, Alice went to Mrs. Pellet to seek advice on supplies and spent the following two days obtaining what she lacked in the way of foodstuffs and made several adjustments in her wardrobe, leaving much behind at Mrs. Pellet’s and supplementing her existing attire with several necessities that were lacking.
She planned to set out on Wednesday, but the sleigh was too small, so Alice had to hire a wagon, which then had to be set on runners to carry her, the boys and her supplies out to the ranch house. She suffered the delay by making some arrangements with the bank to hold her valuables. Just after lunch on Thursday, they were finally on their way.
They set out under crystal-blue skies. Several inches of new white powder had fallen overnight and the world looked brilliant and the air snapped with freshness as they left town. The boys began the journey tucked beneath a blanket in the back, but were too excited to stay put, and to keep them from mischief she entertained them with Christmas carols, singing the ones they knew and teaching them some they did not. Even Mr. Gulliver, their driver, joined along, his voice a wobbly baritone that occasionally strayed from the tune.
The horses trotted along, adding the jingle of sleigh bells to the music, and it was no wonder that both Dillen and Mr. Roberts were waiting for them as they drew into the yard.
The boys tumbled out first, and Dillen came forward to offer her a hand.
“No furs?” he asked.
She bounced down before him. Alice had exchanged her furs for a woolen shawl and wore a simple woolen bodice and skirts with no hoops or bustle whatsoever. Her jewelry remained behind in a bank safe. She felt lighter, freer, and she beamed her happiness at seeing Dillen again.
“We heard that you received a wire,” she said.
Dillen glanced in the wagon and then back to her. “That Tommy is going to get himself fired, yakking like a woman.”
“Perhaps so.”
Roberts limped forward, putting a hand on each of the children’s heads. “Boys, let’s get your gear unloaded.”
By midafternoon all her supplies and necessary possessions were stacked in the living room and Mr. Gulliver had left them. Dillen seemed glad to see her but somewhat reserved, rubbing his neck as he looked at the pile of gear. She feared she’d overwhelmed him again and shifted uncomfortably as she considered this latest misstep.