Gwyneth Bolton

If Only You Knew


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she hesitated. Finally, her shaky hand grabbed on to Paul’s and she took two uneven steps forward.

      Wrapping his arm around her shoulder, Carlton led her into the house.

      Jillian, the head maid, who had been with the Harringtons since Carlton’s parents were alive, came out to greet them. Her pecan-complexioned smooth skin left people in awe when they found out she was well into her sixties. Only her stylishly coiffed hair with startling streaks of silver gave a small hint of her age. Having her around gave Carlton a sense of stability in his life. Even though the petite woman had an opinionated and somewhat bossy nature, she, like his grandfather, had always been there for him.

      “Good evening. You’re home early today. And you brought a beautiful young woman home!” Jillian glanced from Carlton to Latonya and smiled brightly.

      Carlton noticed a strange expression cross Jillian’s face and he cringed as she reached out her hand to Latonya. He could already see the wheels turning in Jillian’s head. The woman had a know-it-all aura about her that usually didn’t bother him, because he usually didn’t have a reason to mind.

      “Hello, my name is Jillian. I all but raised this young man. What’s your name? And will you be staying for dinner?”

      Noting the gleam in Jillian’s eye, Carlton realized that he’d never taken a woman to his home before. He took women out. Wined them. Dined them. But none had the privilege of seeing the space he once shared with his parents. The way Jillian stood there grinning, he hoped she wasn’t getting any crazy ideas. After all, they just happened to be in the neighborhood, he told himself. His bringing Latonya Stevens to his home was no big deal. Right?

      Latonya hesitated for a second before answering Jillian, and he feared that she was uncomfortable. He knew for sure that he was.

      He jumped in to ease her nervousness and his own. “Jillian, this is Latonya, and we won’t be needing dinner this evening.”

      Both women looked stunned for a moment. Carlton placed his hand firmly on Latonya’s back, leading her past the well-meaning but meddlesome Jillian.

      Latonya stopped and glared at him. She narrowed her eyes and snapped, “Excuse you!” Then she turned, smiled and spoke to Jillian. “Is he always this rude?”

      Jillian laughed. “Not always. He has his moments, though.”

      “That’s what I figured. One minute he’s behaving like a pleasant human being and the next he’s a complete caveman.” Latonya turned and shot him an angry look. “It’s not attractive, at all.”

      Carlton felt himself shrinking under the intense glares the two women shot at him. He didn’t like the feeling. “Well, we just had dinner,” was all he could think of as a response.

      “Right. But that was no reason for us to brush past Jillian as if we’re running a marathon.” Latonya folded her arms across her chest.

      Jillian busted out in a fit of laughter, and the melody of her laugh along with the sharpness of Latonya’s tone, left Carlton feeling sufficiently chastised. He definitely didn’t like that.

      “Anyway, Jillian—as I would have said before we were so rudely interrupted—my name is Latonya Stevens. And we just had dinner at a wonderful Cuban restaurant, so I’m stuffed. But thanks for offering. It’s nice to meet you.”

      Jillian now held on to her stomach as she laughed. “I’m going to leave you young folk to your business. You’re going to be all right, girl. I hope to see you again.”

      When they reached his suite, Latonya took a step back, put her hands on her hips and narrowed her eyes. “How dare you? Now that nice woman, who could be my grandmother, thinks I’m some kind of whore or call girl here to provide services!”

      As he stood in front of a beautiful woman whom he wanted beyond expression, the last thing he felt like doing was having some pointless conversation about what Jillian did or didn’t think.

      “She doesn’t think that,” he assured her. “And for the record, I don’t care what she thinks, right now. It doesn’t matter.”

      “Well, I suppose it doesn’t matter to you.”

      Pulling her into his arms, he kissed her. Resisting the passion she felt, she placed her palms on his chest and tried to push him away. He grabbed her arms and put them behind her back, walking her backward toward the bed, all the while caressing her lips with his.

      With a shuddering pant, she broke away. “You really can’t see that you were way out of line, can you?”

      A rush of feelings blazed through Carlton and none of them were familiar. He wondered how this woman could make him feel things he never felt before. And then he was able to name at least one of the foreign feelings, fear. He realized that he was close to ruining any chance he had at really getting to know Latonya and figuring out why she had such an impact on him.

      Running his hand across his head, he mumbled, “Okay. I admit it. I was rude a few minutes ago.”

      She folded her arms across her chest and tilted her head.

      “For the record, I didn’t mean to treat you like a call girl. I just didn’t want Jillian to get started. She can be a bit much at times. And I could see the wheels turning in her head.” He took a step forward and touched her cheek. “Let’s sit down and talk.”

      He led her over to the sitting area of his suite and took a seat on the burgundy Queen Anne sofa.

      “Your bedroom is bigger than our house,” she mumbled wryly. She turned and looked at him. “This is all just a little overwhelming. One minute I’m at work dealing with my ogre of a boss who hates me. The next minute we’re kissing and the ogre seems to be a sweet prince who likes me. And then I’m dealing with a horny toad who’s rude and revving to jump my bones.”

      Carlton flinched. “Ogre? Horny toad? Ouch!” He started laughing, and he couldn’t believe he was laughing when she’d pretty much insulted him. He didn’t usually take insults well. Any other woman would have been shown the door. Latonya Stevens is unlike any other woman. He let the thought settle in his mind for a moment as he continued to laugh.

      “It’s not funny,” Latonya said as she struggled to hold back her own laughter. “I’m being serious.”

      “I know you are. And I know it’s not funny. Okay, so, what can I do to improve your image of me?”

      “Tell me who you are. Really. Ogre, toad or prince?” Kicking off her shoes, she turned, got comfortable on the sofa and waited for his answer.

      He pondered the question thoughtfully. “None of the above. I’m just a man who is extremely attracted to a woman who makes him feel things he’s never felt before. A man who is so out of his realm of reality that he is messing up every chance he gets but hopes that you will have patience with him and allow him a few screwups until he can get it right.”

      Smiling hesitantly, she said softly, “You know, I feel the same way. It’s weird because I’m usually less affected. You know, if you’ve heard one guy’s pickup line, you’ve heard them all. I’ve never found myself in this kind of situation before. There is definitely something different about the way you make me feel. You’ve been under my skin from the first moment I met you. I think I want you out.”

      “I was thinking the same thing. But now, I’m not so sure.” As he stared at the woman in front of him, all of his plans for exorcising Latonya Stevens from his mind went away.

      “You’re not sure,” she mumbled in a hiss of breath as she gazed into his eyes.

      Confusion was another one of those feelings that he wasn’t typically familiar with. “I’m not sure or I can’t be sure until…” He bent his head down and captured her lips. The meeting felt destined and it was all the assurance he needed. I should have stayed far away from Latonya. She was everything he’d spent his life running from, and having her in his arms, he realized that he would probably never want to