Mae Nunn

Fatherhood 101


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chair and crossed one bare leg over the other beneath the full skirt of her faded yellow sundress.

      “Come, sit,” she encouraged, probably in the same patient voice she used with her children.

      He did as instructed, sitting two seats away with her things in between them.

      “I’m a widow.” Her voice was soft but matter-of-fact.

      Before he could stammer out condolences she reached across the vacant seat and placed a hand on his arm.

      “Don’t say anything. It’s been three years and the girls and I are adjusting to our new normal.”

      “How...” Cullen wanted to ask, not at all sure he should.

      “Joe was diagnosed with leukemia right after we learned I was pregnant with our third daughter, Hope. He’d suspected something was terribly wrong for months but kept it to himself because he didn’t want to worry me. We were told from the start it was terminal but we’d have a few years. I don’t pretend it wasn’t devastating to our lives or that everybody’s fine now. We get through it one day at a time and treasure every blessing.”

      “I’m so sorry,” he said softly. “I can’t imagine losing a spouse. When I was in high school, both of my parents were killed in a private plane crash, so I understand a little of what your daughters are going through.”

      “It’s tough for my girls. I try to meet all their emotional needs but nothing can take the place of a daddy, as you well know. And I’m sorry you had a tragic loss at such a young age.”

      “Thank you.” Cullen released a sigh. He was a bonehead, making too much of one failed lecture when the woman beside him was struggling with problems that might eventually get better but would never completely go away. Something else he was well acquainted with.

      After his parents’ deaths, he’d suffered terrifying anxiety attacks, and while they’d subsided years ago, the dread of their return never left him. He’d only ever told Blair and Alma, the woman who’d stepped in to care for the Temple brothers, of his fears.

      Hoping to get them past these sad subjects, he said, “Do you have to rush home, or can I buy you a bite to eat? I’m suddenly starving and the grill in the student center makes great cheeseburgers. I’ll even spring for some onion rings so the evening won’t be a total loss.” He smiled to lift the mood.

      “Could I get a rain check? Tonight I’m meeting my mother and the girls for pizza. It’s one of those family places where kids can stay busy with arcade games for hours. Mom gives them each a roll of quarters and then she’s free to sit and read her romance novel. That should keep everyone occupied for a while, but I should head over soon.”

      “You say it’s a family place?”

      “Yeah, it’s the one out on the loop, near the mall.”

      “Oh, I know the one you’re taking about. They have a nice buffet. What could be better than all the pepperoni pizza you can eat?”

      “Would you care to join us?”

      He shook his head. He hadn’t meant to fish for an invitation. But Blair’s words about giving less attention to the people in books and more to the living had stuck in Cullen’s mind like bubble gum on hot pavement.

      “Oh, I wouldn’t horn in on your family evening. Besides, how would your mother and girls react if a man you just met showed up to share the table?”

      “It’s going to take them about thirty seconds to recognize your face and then they’ll be all up in your business asking questions about your famous twin.”

      Cullen leaned away from the comment. “Hey, I wouldn’t exactly say Hunt’s famous, at least not for anything other than being my little brother. I will give him credit for being a great chef, though. And he still does some appearances on television when he’s not working with his fiancée over at Temple Territory.”

      “Oh, that mansion in Kilgore that’s become a hotel? I hear it’s quite an historical landmark.”

      “I can arrange for your daughters to get a tour of the estate if they’d be interested. Our grandfather built the place and it comes with lots of interesting stories and legends.”

      “That’s a great idea for an outing this summer,” she agreed. “But please join us tonight. There’s probably a whole pepperoni pizza over there with your name on it.”

      The mental picture of rising dough swimming in golden grease from cheese and sausage caused his mouth to water like Pavlov’s dog. He did an inward double take at his very predictable reaction. Maybe he was a natural for the study of human behavior, after all.

      “Only if you’re sure nobody will object.”

      “With five women at the table somebody is always bound to object. It just comes with the territory. So don’t take it personally, it’s a family female thing,” Sarah assured him.

      A family female thing was uncharted water for Cullen. But how hard could it be to share a casual meal with three generations of women? He might even learn something from the experience if he carried some gestures of kindness to soothe the savage breast.

      * * *

      SARAH WASN’T NEARLY as confident as she tried to sound for Cullen’s sake. While she could trust her mother to be hospitable, the girls were another matter. Carrie was in the throes of a Goth stage and Meg was forever wrestling with some imagined worry. Hope lived in la-la land, inventing superhero memories of her daddy to replace the fragile flesh-and-blood truth.

      Thank goodness Sarah had a thirty-minute head start before Cullen arrived at the pizza place. He’d said he had personal business to attend to and then he’d join them. She’d have to set the scene carefully, to say the least.

      “What do you mean a friend from the university is meeting us for dinner?” Meg questioned. “Who is she and how well do you know her?”

      “I was about to ask the same thing,” Sarah’s mother added.

      “My friend is actually a guy and he’s teaching the European history class I’m auditing. He was going to eat dinner alone so I invited him to have pizza with us. You might even recognize him.”

      “He’s not that old high school boyfriend of yours, is he? That Bobby Whatshisname?” asked her mother.

      “Of course not.”

      “Good. I was always suspicious of that kid.”

      “Mom, Bobby got married right after we graduated, he was a torpedo man on a navy guided-missile destroyer and he has a Ph.D. in agricultural economics. I’d say he’s done pretty well for himself. You can let go of those qualms.”

      “Well, I’ve read how women are hooking up with their old flames these days and I don’t want any surprises when this stranger shows up.”

      “He’s nobody from my ancient past, but he does have a face you might have seen before.”

      “Like on an FBI Most Wanted poster? What if he’s a bank robber or a mass murderer?” Meg chewed the tip of a plastic straw.

      “Honey, this guy has spent his entire life in Kilgore, he’s well respected at the university and I’m pretty sure he’s been too busy studying and teaching to dispose of bodies.”

      “So, is this the way college women behave? Will there be a different man in your life every week now?” Carrie’s snide question was inappropriate, but at least she was talking.

      “No, dear,” Sarah said with restraint. At home she’d have lectured her daughter on being disrespectful, but tonight reassurance was more important than manners. “Cullen is the only person on campus who’s even spoken to me, if you don’t count the grouchy woman in the administration office.”

      “Oh, Nancy Norment is still over there? So the University Torment is alive and well. She must be