Sports Psychology For Dummies. Leif H. Smith

end if you take some time off.

      Give your mind and heart “rests” as well, through meditation, imagery, or breathing practice. Take naps! Naps can be one of the best ways to refresh your mind, body, and motivation.

      

When burnout is knocking at the door, reach out to people you can trust — a family member, a friend, a mentor, or a sports psychologist. These people can help you get things out of your head and off your chest so that your motivation can return to its normal levels.

      When you’re being pulled in different directions

      If your life is out of balance, your motivation levels will be drained.

      

You aren’t just an athlete — you’re a person. And you have other aspects of your life that can be stressful, in addition to sports. When your emotional and physical energy resources are being drained by other things in your life outside of sports (like relationships, school, or financial difficulties), you won’t have enough energy for your athletic training. When you’re being pulled in many different directions, especially in a day and age where athletic competition is extremely demanding, your motivation can drop — not because you don’t love your sport, but because you have a finite amount of energy.

      

To keep your motivation going strong when you have lots of outside commitments requiring your time and attention:

       Make sure to take care of the physical basics: sleep and nutrition. Stress drains energy, including motivation, and you need to replenish your body and mind often.

       Build strong coping skills. There are always going to be stressors in your life, but the most important thing is to have the tools to cope with them. The more tools you have, the less energy drain will occur and the less impact on your motivation level. We discuss mental health issues in Chapter 13. You can use the various skills we cover in this book (imagery, confidence building, goal setting, focus, bouncing back from mistakes, and so on) to cope better with life off the playing field as well. Don’t limit their use to sports alone.

       Talk to a sports psychologist about the reasons why your life is out of balance. They can help you get it back.

       Focus on task management. Your life may be out of balance because you’re overextended and not managing your time and priorities well. If you can get a handle on your schedule, you can prevent decreases in motivation that come with feeling overwhelmed. (For more on task management, turn to Chapter 9.)

      When you’re not seeing eye to eye with your coaches and teammates

      Conflict with your coaches or teammates can drain your motivation. In fact, many athletes have left their teams or sports because of this kind of conflict.

      The key is to realize that conflicts with coaches and teammates are part of the athletic experience. You just need to address any conflicts as quickly and as effectively as possible, to minimize their impact on your motivation.

      

You don’t have control over your teammates and coaches, but you do have control over your own attitude and how you handle your relationships with them.

      

Here are some tips to keep in mind when dealing with relationship conflicts:

       If there is a conflict, address it as soon as possible. Holding onto anger, resentment, and bitterness, or simply being confused about why the conflict exists, drains your physical and mental energy and depletes your motivation.

       Keep your focus on your own attitude and what you want to communicate. Differences in opinions and personality styles are part of life. Focus on getting better as an athlete, and those conflicts won’t hurt your motivation.

       Try to understand the other person’s point of view first. You already know where you’re coming from — if you understand how the other person feels, you’ll be closer to resolving the conflict and moving on.

       When you’re in conflict with a coach, remember that you’re ultimately in a one-down position. The coach is the final judge and jury. Convey your opinion, but keep in mind that the coach’s opinion takes priority.

       Try not to take anything personally. Although not taking things personally may seem impossible, you can do it. You may not like the behaviors or decisions of a coach or teammate, but you can choose to take it personally or to see it as unrelated to who you are as a person.

       Consider the fit of the coach and/or team. You may have to consider whether there are too many differences to remain on the team, at that school, or playing under that coach. Try to address your differences before you walk away. But if you’re going to face a constant drain on your motivation by playing on this team under this coach, leaving may be the best choice.

      When your priorities in life change

      Your motivation will naturally ebb and flow over time, but if you notice that your motivation is dropping because of a lack of interest or because you’re developing different priorities, pay attention.

      If you’re losing interest in your sport or you’ve developed an interest in another sport or another non-sport activity, keep in mind that this happens to athletes all the time. Just make sure that that your lack of interest or shift in interest is the true reason for your decline in motivation, and that some other issue — such as a lack of confidence, a conflict with a coach, or some other outside factor — isn’t to blame. If you do have a lack of interest, talk to your parents, coaches, or other people you trust about what you’re thinking and going through. This way, you’ll be able to sort out your thinking more clearly and make a more informed decision.

      For many athletes, admitting to a drop in interest in their sport or simply a greater interest in something else is extremely difficult. Especially if you’ve played your sport for a long time, much of your identity is tied to yourself as an athlete.

      

Admitting to your parents and coaches that you don’t want to play your sport can be painful. You may find it helpful to talk with a sports psychologist — alone and/or with your parents. A sports psychologist can explain to your parents that goals change — and for good reasons. They can tell your parents that they can expect discipline, hard work, integrity, and commitment from you, but that expecting you to want to continue playing a sport you don’t enjoy is unfair. Having the support of a good sports psychologist can help you make this transition more smoothly.