Dear Paris. Laura Paulsen

felt a little nervousness coming up, bit herself on her dry lips, stroked a strand of hair from her face and didn't know how to look inconspicuously up at his window without him noticing if he stood at the window and saw her. What was wrong with her? How could this strange man she knew nothing about make her so nervous?

      She slowly pulled her key out of her handbag, then spent a lot of time looking for mail in her mailbox to increase the chance that she would meet him in the stairwell. But nothing happened. There was no mail in the mailbox, only advertising from the pizza service, which she immediately threw into the waiting trash. Slowly she walked up the stairs, stopped for a moment in front of his apartment door. Nothing. Nothing. No noise came out of the apartment and the door didn't open either. She couldn't stay outside his door for long, she knew that, because it would look a little strange if he suddenly opened the door, and she would stand in front of him. It would look like she was listening. Which she did somehow, even if she didn't put her ear to the door, as she had done at her own door, but just stood in the stairwell. So she didn't stay long in front of Joshua Miller's apartment door and walked on, one staircase higher into her own apartment.

      But only five minutes later she was walking through the stairwell again, a garbage bag in her hand. It was the first time she had grabbed the garbage right after coming home to take it down. Normally she took a break before she started with the household chores. But today was different. She really wanted to see Joshua again and hoped to meet him. This time she did not stop at Joshua Siebert's door but simply walked past it. Everything else would have been a bit conspicuous, if he had noticed something, she said to herself. She didn't even know if he was in the apartment at all. Back in her apartment from the garbage dump, she shook her head about her behavior.

      "Man, what's my problem? I don't even know this guy! I've seen him once before, for a minute, that's it - and I'm pretending here it's my great love!"

      On the other hand, she had to admit that it was not reprehensible to fall in love with someone at first sight - or at least to develop sympathies for someone at first sight and to find him interesting. What spoke against that? Besides, this Joshua had a positive effect on her. She had started off with a little exercise, which she hadn't done for years, and yesterday she had managed to give up the candy she had wanted to get from the kitchen after exercise, and even now while she was preparing dinner, bratwurst with potatoes and sauerkraut, she decided to skip the portion a little smaller than it would normally have been. Instead of three there were two sausages, she had cooked one potato less and the portion of sauerkraut with deliciously crispy fried bacon was not as big as usual. Instead of choosing her beloved large chocolate pudding for dessert, she decided on a small fruit yoghurt. After all, it was a start.

      After dinner, she googled her new neighbor. She didn't find out much about him. He was on Facebook, just like her, but she couldn't find out anything about him except his profile picture because his profile wasn't public. He had protected it, as she herself did with her profile. Only his profile photo was able to see her as well as his place of residence. She would have had to send him a friend request first, and he would have had to confirm it to find out more about him and get insight into his chronicle.

      "What a bummer! I can't just send him a friend request. Nah, I can't...He's wondering why I've been so.

      We'll send a friend request to our neighbor, even though we don't know each other yet. We haven't talked more than the words of welcome when we moved in. I let the search be for him now times and look what there is on Youtube in sports videos. But it's a nice picture of him. His blue eyes are showing to advantage."

      After playing a few sports videos, she decided on one where Pilates for beginners was taught. That seemed the best thing for her. So she put on her sweatpants and started her first Pilates training. The video went half an hour, but already after ten minutes she had had enough and gave up wheezing and sweating. It was something else to participate in the training on the video than simply doing ten minutes of movement exercises.

      "I can't go on! How am I supposed to hold this shit for 30 minutes? I can't take any more, it's too much for me!" Breathing heavily, she leaned on the couch and paused for a moment until her breath became more even and calm and her pulse stopped beating so fast.

      Furious at her inability to keep up the whole video, she stomped into the kitchen and ate the chocolate pudding she had renounced after dinner. While she ate it, she encouraged herself a little.

      After all, I did something at all and ten minutes are quite nice for the beginning, better than nothing. Yesterday I already did ten minutes of gymnastics on the couch. The only thing I shouldn't have eaten was the pudding, that's what's going to put back the calories I've just trampled on. On the other hand, I would normally have eaten the pudding without exercising. So it did do something, I guess."