Websites (Targeted to Women)
1 National Association of Baby Boomer Women (NABBW) (www.nabbw.com)
2 Sixty and Me (www.sixtyandme.com)
Podcasts
Retire Sooner Podcast with Wes Moss (over 60 podcasts):
1 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/retire-sooner-with-wes-moss/id902749218
CHAPTER 2 168 Hours a Week
Does the idea of planning 168 hours a week for two or three decades (or more) sound thrilling or intimidating? If you deduct eight hours in a 24-hour period for sleeping (and I'm guessing not too many of us get a full eight hours of sleep every night), that still leaves 112 hours a week to “fill” mindfully or mindlessly. It was noted in Chapter 1 that it's important to replace the benefits, in addition to a paycheck, that working provides. That is what this chapter is about. Retirement doesn't mean sitting on the sidelines of life. It's the freedom to choose and forge new paths, pursuits, relationships, and opportunities. You can decide who you are and who you want to be. You can re-invent yourself. Kind of like our GPS, when we need to “recalculate.”
Assuming you have the financial means, you can play golf, pickleball, tennis, watch television, and eat all your meals out, but what other options exist? What types of volunteer and lifelong learning opportunities are there? Hobbies? Travel? Play a new sport? Volunteer? Learn a new language? Use the time to deepen relationships with family/friends? Decide to finally lose those 20 or 30 extra pounds you've been carrying around for several decades? Create or do something that will make a lasting impact, long after your death (see Chapter 10)? Start a second (or third or fourth) career (see Chapter 3)?
But, is there a “sweet spot” for how much unscheduled time per day is best? You may have spent or you are spending much of your preretirement life with so many demands on your time, you feel you can barely make a trip to the bathroom. Retirement can change that time crush, but many retired people continue to over-schedule and still feel under constant time pressure. A 2021 study addressed this exact question about time – it turns out people are generally happiest with about two to five hours of unstructured time per day. Fewer than two hours created stress, while more than five hours each day of free time negatively affected feelings of well-being and feeling purposeful. So, just as in the story of Goldilocks (as in many facets of life), there is a balance that is often “just right.” And, what's the best thing to do with that “free time”? The researchers found exercising (I know, for some it's more of a job/obsession), learning new things, or spending time with others increased happiness – in other words, doing things by choice, not obligation. And, the free time doesn't have to be done in large chunks of time to have a beneficial effect. Reading a short chapter of a book or taking a mile hike or just watching the clouds passing overhead for 15 minutes can all be good uses of discretionary time. A reminder – what's considered “free time” for some (walking the dog) could be considered obligatory by others.
Now is a good time to complete the “Time on Your Hands” worksheet at the end of this chapter to get a preliminary sense of how you think you will/do spend your time. The results may be eye-opening. If part of a couple, compare and discuss your results.
Personality and Goal-Setting
Are you a planner? Martha H. is. She took care of her grandchildren for about 10 years after leaving her primary career of teaching Environmental Science and running the Science/Math department at a community college. Martha commuted from New Jersey to Boston for several years, staying Monday–Thursday to babysit, and then for several more years she commuted from New Jersey to New York City to take care of her grandchildren from her other daughter. When the kids were older and the weekly babysitting stint was over, travel (deferred for a year because of Covid-19), reading, snowshoeing (at her second home in Colorado), genealogy, and walking are high on Martha's list of things to do – and she makes sure it happens. Family is at the forefront of many retirees' lists of what is important.
On the other hand, my single friend Jean M. lives very much in the moment. She will go on a trip without hotel reservations, embraces each day as it comes, and is willing to drop whatever she's doing and help out family members if they need assistance, including caring for her mother for several years as her mom slowly succumbed to Alzheimer's.
Gordon C. loosely structures his time. He plays occasional golf, some tennis, maintains the house, and is catching up on all the books he wanted to read as a busy professional but never had the time to do so. He also serves on the Board of his community association, and volunteers at a food bank. He and his wife care for their grandchildren at least once a week to give their adult children a break and to enjoy some quality time with the kids. As Gordon likes to say, “I feel youthful when I am useful.”
Teresa G. divorced after a long marriage and a fulfilling career as a counselor, and is now a realtor. She lives in Florida, loves working with and helping people find their ideal place, and immensely enjoys her second career. She finds her counseling background provides many skills she can use in her new role.
These examples of different people with different personalities share this in common: They all have goals they want to accomplish.
For most people goal setting is important. The research shows that people who aren't engaged in purposeful activities are generally not as happy as those who are. Whether you're talking about starting a new business, taking up birding, becoming a mentor, or trying out for a community theater production, it's best to be flexible, try out new things, have a natural curiosity about life, and have at least a general plan for your future.
Make lists! Take the time to think about what you want to accomplish, and write down your goals. If you are part of a couple, set down both individual and joint ideas relating to family, working, travel, health, lifelong learning, volunteering, friends, making a difference, learning a new sport or language, or any other area. Recognize that each person in the relationship has valid needs and wants. Decide which interests you share, and recognize that having time apart for separate interests is also important. Brainstorm all possibilities, then evaluate and prune the unworkable ones.
Be SMART
I love mnemonics and acronyms. They make things much easier to remember. As a kid, you may remember “ROY G BIV,” a clever way of remembering the order of the hues of the rainbow: Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet. I took many, many science classes as an undergrad and grad student, and remember the taxonomic hierarchy of organisms by making up this crazy sentence (can recall it decades later) … Keep Putting Cheese On Fresh Gravy Soup … which represents Kingdom, Phylum, Class, Order Family, Genus, Species.
SMART is an easy-to-remember acronym describing the characteristics of goal-setting: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Time-Sensitive. So, when coming up with your goals, be SMART. Rather than saying “I want to continue to learn new things,” say “I will sign up for a European history class at my local community college for the upcoming spring semester.” Rather