David Baddiel

The Boy Who Could Do What He Liked


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       Copyright

      First published in Great Britain by HarperCollins Children’s Books in 2016

      HarperCollins Children’s Books is a division of HarperCollins Publishers Ltd,

      1 London Bridge Street

      London SE1 9GF

      The HarperCollins website address is:

       www.harpercollins.co.uk

      Text © David Baddiel, 2016

      Illustrations © Jim Field 2016

      Jacket illustration © Jim Field, 2016

      Jacket Design © HarperCollins Publishers Ltd 2016

      David Baddiel and Jim Field assert the moral right to be identified as the author and illustrator of the work.

      A catalogue copy of this book is available from the British Library.

      All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.

      Source ISBN: 9780008167806

      Ebook Edition © 2016 ISBN: 9780008164911

      Version: 2016-02-01

       To the real Mrs Stokes …

      Contents

       Cover

       Title Page

       Dedication

       Chapter 4: 6.15pm

       Chapter 5: 6.35pm

       Chapter 6: 6.49pm

       End of Part 1

       Interlude

       Part 2

       Time Stop: 6.49pm

       Having-Tea: 6.49pm

       Clearing-up-After-Tea: 6.49pm

       Homework: 6.49pm

       Limited-Amount-of-Tv: 6.49pm

       Bath: 6.49pm

       Cleaning-his-Teeth-in-the-Evening: 6.49pm

       Getting-Undressed-and-Putting-Pyjamas-on: 6.49pm

       Going-to-Bed: 6.49pm

       Part 3

       Chapter 7: 10.25pm

       Read an extract from The Parent Agency

       Also by David Baddiel

       About the Publisher

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      Alfie Moore had a routine. To be honest, he had a lot of routines. He had a waking-up routine, a getting-dressed routine, a cleaning-his-teeth-in-the-morning routine, a breakfast routine, a clearing-up-after-breakfast routine, a getting-his-schoolbag-ready routine, a checking-he-had-everything-before-he-left-the-house routine, a walking-to-and-from-school routine, a having-tea routine, a clearing-up-after-tea routine, a homework routine, a limited-amount-of-TV routine, a bath routine, a cleaning-his-teeth-in-the-evening routine (which, to be fair, was pretty similar to his cleaning-his-teeth-in-the-morning routine), a getting-undressed-and-putting-pyjamas-on routine and a going-to-bed routine.

      Alfie was eleven and the routines had all been worked out by his dad, Stephen. Each one was precisely written out, listing all the things he had to do, and the times he had do them by, on pieces of paper pinned up on different walls of his house. For example, the waking-up and getting-dressed routines were on his bedroom wall, along with the getting-undressed-and-putting-pyjamas-on and going-to-bed routines, only on a different piece of paper (placed very neatly next to the first one).

      But Alfie never needed to look at those pieces of paper because he knew all his routines by heart. Plus, he wore two watches, one on each wrist (one digital and one analogue, both given to him by his dad) to make sure he always knew the time. As a result, he was never late for school, always knew what clothes to wear, was never tired from going to bed late and always got all his homework done.

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      Alfie was perfectly happy. The routines made his life work very, very well; it only wasn’t