pain. No, this cannot be… This is pain. Terrible pain. Everywhere. One continuous lump of pain, as if there were no arms or legs, but only a huge ball of suffering. Hands? Legs? Where are they? Isn’t this death? Not death… Thousands of ants are crawling on him, moving their mustaches and laughing, laughing, shaking their thin paws in the air. Their red bellies are increasing in size. The red colour covers everything around, the ants are making louder and louder noise, they demand something, repeating the same word: – Chilii!1” Strange, the word seems to be familiar, too. Who is this? Someone calls him:
– Lacius, get up! Get up, otherwise they’ll kill you! Do you hear me, get up! – he can hear, but how awfully painful his shoulder hurts. Someone is shaking him. Is he really alive? This thought turned into a huge bell that rang in his head with all its might, and all the events echoed loudly in his awakened memory.
– No, – he managed to whisper quietly.
– Get up, get up! At least, your legs aren’t tied. Let’s do it! – someone pushed him, trying his best. Lacius barely opened his eyes and saw a familiar face covered in abrasions and bruises.
– Lucro… – he muttered.
– Get up! – the old friend rose to his knees with a groan. – They will check, and then you may fall down again!
– Chitshuang! Shangxng!2 – came from somewhere above. His legs don’t obey him, but he still manages to get up…
Lacius straightened his knees with difficulty and pressed his forehead into the wet earthen wall so as not to fall. It was a large pit, where they once stored their first supplies of food and honey. Water was dripping from above, and the river flowed nearby.
In the corner, several Han soldiers came down the stairs and began checking the prisoners. Three people were unable to respond to their pushes and blows. Followed several sword thrusts into the stomach and chest to ensure death, and the lifeless bodies are already dragged upstairs. Fast, how fast everything is…
Lucro fell to the ground. His hands and feet were tied. Lacius slowly sank down next to him.
– What happened? – he asked quietly. – I don’t remember.
– All the Xiongnu were killed. Right on the square. The women and children were taken away. We were tied up and thrown here.
– Young Zeno and Mark?..
– Over there. Alive. They’re lying down.
– That’s all? And those, who gave up, what happened to them?
– Dunno. I think they killed them, too. Together with the Xiongnu. They say there were about fifteen hundred in the city. Men. They cut everyone down, – Lucro spoke in short phrases. He also had difficulty breathing. His blue lips with a white coating were cracked and could barely move. He hasn’t drunk water for a long time.
– Why did they leave us alive? – Lacius muttered, but Lucro did not hear the question and, falling back, tiredly closed his eyes.
– When do you think they will kill us? – the old friend asked quietly.
– Dunno. Maybe now…
– Lacius, it’s all your fault, – someone’s voice was heard from the other side. – Why did you bring us here? For what? Because of you, we will all die… – the man fell silent, but Lacius had nothing to answer. – Do you know what the worst thing is? The worst is dying like a rat in this hole…
– Tiberius, is that you? – Lacius asked quietly.
– Yes, it’s me… Do you remember Vargaunt? He used to say it was better to die with a sword in battle than like a worm in the ground. And no one sees this…
– Vargaunt was my best friend.
– Mine, too. But he died like a hero, and we’ll die like slaves in the quarries. Have you seen how slaves are killed?
– I have…
– And… that means you know… Where is our glory, Lacius? Where is the Rome we defended? We will die here… and no one there will know about it. Nobody…
– We will be remembered, you’re wrong, – his throat had difficulty pronouncing each word, which echoed loudly in his head.
– The worst thing is to die in the unknown… not in public, not in front of comrades with a sword in your hands, but like a frog. They step on you – and you just croak, that’s it, you’re dead, – it seemed that Tiberius was already talking to himself, not listening to his answers. – I hate it… Are you afraid, too? Are you? They’ll come now, poke you with a sword, and you’ll die. No, don’t you? Are you afraid? Then get up, show that you are alive…
The screams of soldiers were indeed heard from above, and the stairs were lowered down again. Lacius caught himself thinking that he also did not want to die and was very thirsty. Especially now, when his whole body ached in pain and he couldn’t even move to protect himself. His head and thoughts existed separately, and pain, along with thirst, defeated his former pride.
So another day passed after the battle. The second night was approaching. He had already forgotten the first one – there were just a few spots in his memory left, nothing more. All this time the Romans were given neither water nor food. This was a sure sign that they would soon be killed. The Chinese don’t waste water on corpses. Tired of looking at the sky, Lacius turned over on his side and froze. The sun had long since dropped below the horizon, and now an unpleasant coolness, along with fog, began to fill their pit like water. At first, it seemed pleasant, but then the damp earth gradually began to draw the warmth out of him. He tried to get up. A sharp pain pierced both knees, and Lacius fell face down into the dirt with a groan. There was no strength to turn over. The breath of death was already felt in this grave pit. Everyone lay motionless and awaited their fate limply, like animals. They did not resist, gradually plunging into a state of sluggish indifference.
When someone’s hands lifted him up, Lacius did not even open his eyes. He didn’t care. They dragged him somewhere, scolded him, kicked him, and then even untied his hands. The fingers did not move. He was lying near a hole in the wall. There was no one nearby. A stone was beneath his neck, the head fell back, and the stars in the eyes, at first so bright and close, began to slowly spin and go out.
The burning pain in his hands brought Lacius to his senses. Shoulders, elbows, hands and palms – everything burned and itched, as if they had been dipped in boiling oil. Thousands of needles pierced the entire skin. The gods sent him torment instead of death, which he could not endure. Was it really easier in the desert near Carrhae? Hardly. But there was no such despair and emptiness. Then there was still hope that he, as a legate, would be found, redeemed, exchanged, and not abandoned…
A cart, carrying bodies, passed by. They were taken to the city. This means they will burn the corpses. Well, that makes sense. There’s a lot of wood there. Everything will burn to the ground. They drag him there, too. This means they will also burn him. Or they will torture him first. He saw a sword. But there was no longer any strength to reach it, sticking out from under a piece of log. The fingers twitched and stopped. How his body itched and hurt! Someone’s shadow bent over him.
– Ta huojk3, – a hoarse voice rang out. Lacius opened his eyes and said:
– Meyou siwang4. Zai nali ni tuo wo5? – he asked with the last of his strength, but the Han warriors recoiled from him in fear and began to quickly talk about something. Individual words could be heard from them, but they swirled around in Lacius’ head, without turning into meaning. Finally, he was picked up again and quickly brought to the former Chanyu’s