heart.»
«Rachel, I don’t have the money to give up work and study. Thank you for your warm words. No-one has ever spoken of me so highly» said Akiva, not without some sadness.
«I have to go now Akiva, but mark my words, it’s never too late to start learning. The wisemen say that we must keep learning forever, right up until old age.»
Long after they had parted Akiva continued to mull over Rachel’s words and everything she had said about him.
Every day, Rachel came to the river and they she and Akiva talked for hours becoming close friends. Akiva had never been so happy as he was spending time with Rachel, talking to the sweetest, most wonderful girl in the world.
Akiva intended to spend the forthcoming Shabbat in the home of the old man Shimon and his wife.
In Shimon’s house the jangling sound of crockery could be heard as Shimon’s wife Dvora cleared the table after the Shabbat meal. Concerned by his guest’s silence, Shimon asked, «Why are you so quiet today Akiva, has something happened?»
Akiva said nothing.
«My eyes do not deceive me. Tell me what has happened.»
«All right, I will tell you, only please listen to me, and don’t be angry. Recently, Rachel and I have become very close. We see each other almost every day and we talk for ages. What do you think? Is there even a grain of hope that I could be the husband of Rachel, daughter of Kalba Savua?»
«You didn’t take my advice after all. You didn’t keep your distance» said Shimon sadly. «Akiva, as your elder, please, forget about her before it is too late. It’s for the best, for you and for her. Find another woman who is worthy of you and have a family. Why torment yourself and the young girl? You may be mistaken and have misinterpreted your conversations as an expression of some special attention on her part.»
«Mr. Shimon, I am certain that there is something more between us than simple conversation. Nothing like this has ever happened to me before. I can’t forget about her, not for one moment. I look for her everywhere and in every sound I strain to hear her voice».
«The moment Kalba Savua learns of your affections, he will drive you off the estate and you will again wander round Judea in search of a wage» said Shimon, admonishing his ward.
«So be it. I am not afraid of anything any more. I want to be with her. Let him drive me away. I can’t live without her» said Akiva decisively.
«It’s useless trying to talk about it» thought Shimon giving a heavy sigh.
«Mr. Shimon, Do you think I don’t know that she is an impossible dream for someone like me and that we can never be together?» Akiva continued.
«So if you understand, why do you continue to spend time with her?»
«I tried to take your advice but I just can’t help it. It’s something more powerful than I am. I can’t begin to describe what she means to me. I have never experienced anything like it. Until I met Rachel, I hated this world and everything in it. Even if nothing can happen between us, I dream only of one thing; that it last as long as possible. I’d give my whole life just to spend one minute with her. I have lived a dull life but now at least I will have something good to remember when I die,» Akiva pronounced sadly.
Shimon felt sorry for Akiva. He could see the love and respect the shepherd felt for Rachel and having thought for a moment he said, «I can see you have made your mind up and there is nothing I can say to stop you. All I can do is ask you to think it through one more time.»
«Dear Mr. Shimon, I have already thought it all over and have made my decision. If fate has destined her to be mine, then we will be together.»
«Rachel is a fine young woman. Perhaps she will agree to be your wife and you will live a good life together. A lot in life depends on your wife. If you have a wise woman at your side who commands your respect, you will try to become a better man so as not to disappoint her.»
«Thank you Shimon for your kind words. I really need them at the moment.»
«Oh Akiva! Don’t forget» lamented Shimon suddenly, «you are almost twice her age and you are very different kinds of people, different in position and means. An affair like that can only end in tragedy.»
«So the reality is that a simple man like me, is not worthy of happiness and Rachel cannot be the wife of a poor shepherd?» Akiva’s eyes shone. «But I have to try. If she is my destiny, we will be together. And if she isn’t, then I shall spend the rest of my life alone,» said the shepherd despondently.
«Akiva, Akiva,» sighed Shimon heavily, «I can see there is nothing anyone can do. Since you mentioned her the first time, I have tried to dissuade you, to frighten you into giving up on the whole idea, but your intentions are obviously serious and I respect you for that.»
Mr. Shimon was silent for a moment and then he said confidently:
«If I was in your shoes and I liked a girl, do you know what I would do? I wouldn’t listen to an old man like me. I would go and talk to her father.»
«I agree but I am so afraid, afraid of losing Rachel. You don’t understand Mr.Shimon. If Kalba Savua refuses to allow it, Rachel and I won’t be able to see each other.»
«I am prepared to go and talk to Kalba Savua myself» the old man offered, «even if it does spoil our relationship.»
«No. This is the most important thing in my life. I have to do it myself,» said Akiva decisively, turning down Shimon’s offer of help.
* * *
Akiva returned to the Kalba Savua estate and set about his duties. Early in the morning, he drove the sheep to the river and waited for Rachel to appear. He turned round to look for her at every sound, but Rachel didn’t appear. It was getting dark. In the hope of seeing his beloved, Akiva decided to hang on by the river for longer than usual but eventually he left to go back for the night and drove the herd into the fold.
Back at the main house, the estate workers were having their supper in the dining room but Akiva didn’t join them making straight for his room. Once inside, he lit a candle and lay down to rest. All his thoughts were occupied with Rachel totally dulling out any thought of food. He didn’t feel the slightest pang of hunger despite not having eaten since morning. He could only think about one thing: Why had not Rachel come that day? However he looked at it, Akiva could not settle on a definitive answer.
Akiva worked hard to drive away his sad thoughts and dreamed only of seeing Rachel again. In his dreams, they walked hand in hand along the banks of the river discussing various topics of conversation. And when the sun began its journey home, they would sit on the tall rock watching a spectacular sunset. In his imagination they sat watching silently as the sun sank smoothly down into the river and the clouds drifted slowly into the distance. The silence was intoxicating broken only by the occasional sounds of leaves and birdsong.
A knock at the door interrupted Akiva’s flight of fantasy. He got up slowly and went to open the door. Ezra stood in the doorway.
«Peace to you, Akiva. Why did not you come for supper?» Asked the manager.
«I was just feeling a bit tired and decided to rest instead,» the shepherd answered, a little surprised by Ezra’s appearance.
«I was worried you might have been taken ill and have brought you some supper. Have something to eat.» Ezra held out the plate.
Akiva thanked him and put the plate of food on the table. Ezra left but Akiva didn’t touch his supper. He just lay down again thinking about Rachel and dreaming of another meeting with her. He wanted to fall asleep as soon as possible so that he would wake up to a new day which had to bring him the opportunity of seeing his beloved Rachel.
The next day however, did not