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The First Part of King Henry the Fourth


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a trick worth two of that,

          i' faith.

        Gads. I pray thee lend me thine.

        2. Car. Ay, when? canst tell? Lend me thy lantern, quoth he?

      Marry,

          I'll see thee hang'd first!

        Gads. Sirrah carrier, what time do you mean to come to London?

        2. Car. Time enough to go to bed with a candle, I warrant thee.

          Come, neighbour Mugs, we'll call up the gentlemen. They will

          along with company, for they have great charge.

Exeunt [Carriers]

        Gads. What, ho! chamberlain!

      Enter Chamberlain.

        Cham. At hand, quoth pickpurse.

        Gads. That's even as fair as- 'at hand, quoth the chamberlain';

      for

          thou variest no more from picking of purses than giving

      direction

          doth from labouring: thou layest the plot how.

        Cham. Good morrow, Master Gadshill. It holds current that I

      told

          you yesternight. There's a franklin in the Wild of Kent hath

          brought three hundred marks with him in gold. I heard him

      tell it

          to one of his company last night at supper- a kind of

      auditor;

          one that hath abundance of charge too, God knows what. They

      are

          up already and call for eggs and butter. They will away

          presently.

        Gads. Sirrah, if they meet not with Saint Nicholas' clerks,

      I'll

          give thee this neck.

        Cham. No, I'll none of it. I pray thee keep that for the

      hangman;

          for I know thou worshippest Saint Nicholas as truly as a man

      of

          falsehood may.

        Gads. What talkest thou to me of the hangman? If I hang, I'll

      make

          a fat pair of gallows; for if I hang, old Sir John hangs with

      me,

          and thou knowest he is no starveling. Tut! there are other

          Troyans that thou dream'st not of, the which for sport sake

      are

          content to do the profession some grace; that would (if

      matters

          should be look'd into) for their own credit sake make all

      whole.

          I am joined with no foot land-rakers, no long-staff sixpenny

          strikers, none of these mad mustachio purple-hued maltworms;

      but

          with nobility, and tranquillity, burgomasters and great

      oneyers,

          such as can hold in, such as will strike sooner than speak,

      and

          speak sooner than drink, and drink sooner than pray; and yet,

          zounds, I lie; for they pray continually to their saint, the

          commonwealth, or rather, not pray to her, but prey on her,

      for

          they ride up and down on her and make her their boots.

        Cham. What, the commonwealth their boots? Will she hold out

      water

          in foul way?

        Gads. She will, she will! Justice hath liquor'd her. We steal

      as in

          a castle, cocksure. We have the receipt of fernseed, we walk

          invisible.

        Cham. Nay, by my faith, I think you are more beholding to the

      night

          than to fernseed for your walking invisible.

        Gads. Give me thy hand. Thou shalt have a share in our

      purchase, as

          I and a true man.

        Cham. Nay, rather let me have it, as you are a false thief.

        Gads. Go to; 'homo' is a common name to all men. Bid the ostler

          bring my gelding out of the stable. Farewell, you muddy

      knave.

Exeunt

      Scene II. The highway near Gadshill

      Enter Prince and Poins.

        Poins. Come, shelter, shelter! I have remov'd Falstaff's horse,

      and

          he frets like a gumm'd velvet.

        Prince. Stand close. [They step aside.]

      Enter Falstaff.

        Fal. Poins! Poins, and be hang'd! Poins!

        Prince. I comes forward I Peace, ye fat-kidney'd rascal! What a

          brawling dost thou keep!

        Fal. Where's Poins, Hal?

        Prince. He is walk'd up to the top of the hill. I'll go seek

      him.

                                                        [Steps aside.]

        Fal. I am accurs'd to rob in that thief's company. The rascal

      hath

          removed my horse and tied him I know not where. If I travel

      but

          four foot by the squire further afoot, I shall break my wind.

          Well, I doubt not but to die a fair death for all this, if I

          scape hanging for killing that rogue. I have forsworn his

      company

          hourly any time this two-and-twenty years, and yet I am

      bewitch'd

          with the rogue's company. If the rascal have not given me

          medicines to make me love him, I'll be hang'd. It could not

      be

          else. I have drunk medicines. Poins! Hal! A plague upon you

      both!

          Bardolph! Peto! I'll starve ere I'll rob a foot further. An

          'twere not as good a deed as drink to turn true man and to

      leave

          these rogues, I am the veriest varlet that ever chewed with a

          tooth. Eight yards of uneven ground is threescore and ten

      miles

          afoot with me, and the stony-hearted villains know it well

          enough. A plague upon it when thieves