the identity of Barnard with Gerald Devereux was that derived from the power he seemed to possess over Isora. Here, too, at once, was explained the pretended Barnard’s desire of concealment, and the vigilance with which it had been effected. It was so certain that Gerald, if my rival, would seek to avoid me; it was so easy for him, who could watch all my motions, to secure the power of doing so. Then I remembered Gerald’s character through the country as a gallant and a general lover; and I closed my eyes as if to shut out the vision when I recalled the beauty of his form contrasted with the comparative plainness of my own.
“There is no hope,” I repeated; and an insensibility, rather than sleep, crept over me. Dreadful and fierce dreams peopled my slumbers; and, when I started from them at a late hour the next day, I was unable to rise from my bed: my agitation and my wanderings had terminated in a burning fever. In four days, however, I recovered sufficiently to mount my horse: I rode to the Spaniard’s house; I found there only the woman who had been Don Diego’s solitary domestic. The morning before, Alvarez and his daughter had departed, none knew for certain whither; but it was supposed their destination was London. The woman gave me a note: it was from Isora; it contained only these lines:
Forget me: we are now parted forever. As you value my peace of mind—of happiness I do not speak—seek not to discover our next retreat. I implore you to think no more of what has been; you are young, very young. Life has a thousand paths for you; any one of them will lead you from remembrance of me. Farewell, again and again!
With this note was another, in French, from Don Diego: it was colder and more formal than I could have expected; it thanked me for my attentions towards him; it regretted that he could not take leave of me in person, and it enclosed the sum by the loan of which our acquaintance had commenced.
“It is well!” said I, calmly, to myself, “it is well; I will forget her:” and I rode instantly home. “But,” I resumed in my soliloquy, “I will yet strive to obtain confirmation to what perhaps needs it not. I will yet strive to see if Gerald can deny the depth of his injuries towards me; there will be at least some comfort in witnessing either his defiance or his confusion.”
Agreeably to this thought, I hastened to seek Gerald. I found him in his apartment; I shut the door, and seating myself, with a smile thus addressed him,—
“Dear Gerald, I have a favour to ask of you.”
“What is it?”
“How long have you known a certain Mr. Barnard?” Gerald changed colour; his voice faltered as he repeated the name “Barnard!”
“Yes,” said I, with affected composure, “Barnard! a great friend of Don Diego D’Alvarez.”
“I perceive,” said Gerald, collecting himself, “that you are in some measure acquainted with my secret: how far it is known to you I cannot guess; but I tell you, very fairly, that from me you will not increase the sum of your knowledge.”
When one is in a good sound rage, it is astonishing how calm one can be! I was certainly somewhat amazed by Gerald’s hardihood and assurance, but I continued, with a smile,
“And Donna Isora, how long, if not very intrusive on your confidence, have you known her?”
“I tell you,” answered Gerald, doggedly, “that I will answer no questions.”
“You remember the old story,” returned I, “of the two brothers, Eteocles and Polynices, whose very ashes refused to mingle; faith, Gerald, our love seems much of the same sort. I know not if our ashes will exhibit so laudible an antipathy: but I think our hearts and hands will do so while a spark of life animates them; yes, though our blood” (I added, in a voice quivering with furious emotion) “prevents our contest by the sword, it prevents not the hatred and the curses of the heart.”
Gerald turned pale. “I do not understand you,” he faltered out,—“I know you abhor me; but why, why this excess of malice?”
I cast on him a look of bitter scorn, and turned from the room.
It is not pleasing to place before the reader these dark passages of fraternal hatred: but in the record of all passions there is a moral; and it is wise to see to how vast a sum the units of childish animosity swell, when they are once brought into a heap, by some violent event, and told over by the nice accuracy of Revenge.
But I long to pass from these scenes, and my history is about to glide along others of more glittering and smiling aspect. Thank Heaven, I write a tale, not only of love, but of a life; and that which I cannot avoid I can at least condense.
CHAPTER X
MY uncle for several weeks had flattered himself that I had quite forgotten or foregone the desire of leaving Devereux Court for London. Good easy man! he was not a little distressed when I renewed the subject with redoubled firmness, and demanded an early period for that event. He managed, however, still to protract the evil day. At one time it was impossible to part with me, because the house was so full; at another time it was cruel to leave him, when the house was so empty. Meanwhile, a new change came over me. As the first shock of Isora’s departure passed away, I began to suspect the purity of her feelings towards me. Might not Gerald—the beautiful, the stately, the glittering Gerald—have been a successful wooer under the disguised name of Barnard, and hence Isora’s confusion when that name was mentioned, and hence the power which its possessor exercised over her?
This idea, once admitted, soon gained ground. It is true that Isora had testified something of favourable feelings towards me; but this might spring from coquetry or compassion. My love had been a boy’s love, founded upon beauty and coloured by romance. I had not investigated the character of the object; and I had judged of the mind solely by the face. I might easily have been deceived: I persuaded myself that I was. Perhaps Gerald had provided their present retreat for sire and daughter; perhaps they at this moment laughed over my rivalry and my folly. Methought Gerald’s lip wore a contemptuous curve when we met. “It shall have no cause,” I said, stung to the soul; “I will indeed forget this woman, and yet, though in other ways, eclipse this rival. Pleasure, ambition, the brilliancy of a court, the resources of wealth, invite me to a thousand joys. I will not be deaf to the call. Meanwhile I will not betray to Gerald, to any one, the scar of the wound I have received; and I will mortify Gerald, by showing him that, handsome as he is, he shall be forgotten in my presence!”
Agreeably to this exquisite resolution, I paid incessant court to the numerous dames by whom my uncle’s mansion was thronged; and I resolved to prepare, among them, the reputation for gallantry and for wit which I proposed to establish in town.
“You are greatly altered since your love,” said Aubrey, one day to me, “but not by your love. Own that I did right in dissuading you from its indulgence!”
“Tell me!” said I, sinking my voice to a whisper, “do you think Gerald was my rival?” and I recounted the causes of my suspicion.
Aubrey’s countenance testified astonishment as he listened. “It is strange, very strange,” said he; “and the evidence of the boat is almost conclusive; still I do not think it quite sufficient to leave no loop-hole of doubt. But what matters it? you have conquered your love now.”
“Ay,” I said, with a laugh, “I have conquered it, and I am now about to find some other empress of the heart. What think you of the Lady Hasselton?—a fair dame and a sprightly. I want nothing but her love to be the most enviable of men, and a French valet-de-chambre to be the most irresistible.”
“The former is easier to obtain than the latter, I fear,” returned Aubrey; “all places produce light dames, but the war makes a scarcity of French valets.”
“True,” said I, “but I never thought of instituting a comparison between their relative