you.’
‘That wasn’t my idea!’
Petra had hit a sore spot. While I was in a hospital regrowth tank, getting my leg fixed after the rescue of Solar 5, Fian decided to tell the class I was Handicapped. He refused to say exactly what happened then, but people would obviously have been shocked and angry about the lies I’d told. Playdon would have kept things under control, but still …
Well, Fian faced the class for me back then, which was truly zan of him, but I’m the sort of person who prefers to fight their own battles rather than cower behind someone else. That was why I was hiding the Petra situation from him now. If he knew what was going on, he’d want to get involved and we’d start arguing. I wasn’t in a regrowth tank now, Petra was my problem, not Fian’s, and I’d deal with her.
‘I’m surprised you haven’t gone crying to Playdon yet,’ said Petra. ‘He’s made it clear he’s an ape lover. Of course, if you do go whining to him, it’s just your word against several of us and …’
She broke off and turned to look down the corridor. I saw Joth was walking towards us and relaxed. Petra was far too cunning to say anything nasty in front of anyone except her fellow ape haters, so she’d have to shut up now.
Joth reached us and Petra turned to smile at him. ‘Smelly around here, isn’t it? Why don’t you tell the throwback to get out of our way?’
I stared at her in disbelief, and saw her smile widen. What was going on here? I turned to Joth and his eyes evaded mine.
‘Get lost, ape,’ he said. ‘You should be kept outside in a cage so real people aren’t bothered by the stink.’
He brushed past me and hurried off down the corridor. I turned to gaze after him in shock. Back at the start of the course, Joth had done something incredibly stupid during an excavation and nearly injured me. Once I realized he was simply clueless at practical things, rather than a homicidal maniac out to deliberately kill me, we’d become friends, though I still felt he couldn’t be trusted to pick up a knife and fork by the handles instead of the sharp ends. Joth had remained my friend even after he found out I was Handicapped, but now he’d …
My face must have given away my hurt feelings, because Petra gave a triumphant laugh. ‘Joth’s asked me to Two with him.’
She chased after Joth and he put his arm around her. The situation was brutally clear now. Joth and Petra were the heavy lift operators for team 4. They spent a lot of time together, and Joth had got involved with her. Either he was fool enough not to realize how nasty Petra was, or he knew what she was like and didn’t care as long as he got to tumble her. It didn’t matter which. Petra wanted Joth to insult me, so he’d done it. A friend had just become an enemy.
I retreated to the nearest bathroom, stripped off my clothes, and stepped into the shower. Comforting warm water poured over me while I thought things through. If Petra and Joth were Twoing, there was no hope of regaining Joth as a friend. I just had to accept the situation. The usual insults would have an extra painful sting when they came from Joth, but I’d cope with it. I was used to insults. I’d spent all my life watching the vids made on the sector worlds, never knowing when one of the characters would suddenly make a joke about dumb apes like me.
I had to forget Joth now. He was just another of the pathetic people calling me names. I should focus on the good things, on the friends who’d stuck by me when they found out I was Handicapped. Dig sites were dangerous places and I was tag leader for dig team 1, so I was the one standing in the middle of the excavation work and taking most of the risks. It was vital to be able to trust the other members of my team, and I’d been very lucky with all four of them.
I turned the shower to dry mode, and jets of air blasted at me while I fixed my thoughts on the people who’d forgiven my lies and accepted me as if I was another norm. Dalmora, our sensor sled operator, was the only Alphan in the class. When we first met, I’d expected her to be a spoilt brat, because she was the daughter of Ventrak Rostha, the famous maker of history vids. Instead, she was one of the kindest, most thoughtful people I’d ever known.
Amalie and Krath were our two heavy lift operators. Amalie was a quiet, solid, and totally dependable girl from a frontier world in Epsilon sector, and Krath … well, he could be a bit of a nardle socially, but he was good at practical things and an amaz heavy lift operator.
I’d been confident both Dalmora and Amalie would give me a chance when they knew I was Handicapped, but I’d expected the worst from Krath. His father helped run an amateur vid channel, Truth Against Oppression, and Krath had kept quoting his stupid conspiracy theories and nasty comments about apes. Once the class knew I was Handicapped, I’d been braced for insults from him, but he’d startled me by grinning and announcing that if Jarra was an ape, then apes were pretty good after all. When Krath bothered to think for himself, instead of repeating his father’s ideas, there were definite signs of hope for him.
And then, most importantly of all, there was Fian. We weren’t just Twoing; he was also my tag support, constantly watching for danger, ready to use his lifeline beam to snatch me to safety. Fian hadn’t just accepted me; he’d even said we could both transfer to a University Earth course if there was too much prejudice from the rest of the class. I was determined not to do that, because it would mess up our studies, but it proved Fian was truly zan.
I was dry now, so I stepped out of the shower. Yes, it would be nice if everyone accepted me as a real human being, and I wasn’t the target of insults whenever I walked down a corridor alone, but that was never going to happen. I’d deliberately chosen to gatecrash a class of norms, I’d had the worst possible motives for doing it, and the current situation was far better than I deserved.
I got dressed again, headed back to the hall, and opened the door to find Krath standing in front of the big wall vid. He’d set it back to Earth Rolling News, and the picture showed dazzling white sparks streaking across an area of rubble. A lifeline beam yanked an impact suit clad figure out of their path, just as the sound of screaming sensor sled alarms was drowned by a loud explosion. There were people shouting and a female voice yelling in pain. That voice was mine.
For a second I was back in time, reliving the accident during the Solar 5 rescue that had earned me the Artemis medal. There was even a shooting pain in my leg. I dragged myself out of that, back to reality, and yelled at Krath.
‘Turn that off!’
‘What?’ He gave me a wounded look. ‘I was just …’
‘Turn it off, Krath.’ Playdon’s voice interrupted him. ‘Jarra doesn’t want to keep watching an accident where she was seriously injured.’
‘Sorry,’ said Krath. ‘I should have thought.’
I shook my head. ‘No, I’m just being a nardle. I’ve seen that vid a dozen times already, so I shouldn’t react this way.’
The rest of the class gradually trickled into the dome during the afternoon, all making loud complaints about queues. Fian, Krath, and I spent a lot of time trying to talk sense into Dalmora, who was still worried about being late.
Krath shook his head. ‘It wasn’t your fault. Why are you so upset about it?’
‘On Danae, being late is considered a serious social failing,’ said Dalmora. ‘My family would be horrified to hear I’d been disrespectful to my lecturer and classmates by being late returning to my course.’
We explained to Dalmora about ten times that Playdon understood it wasn’t her fault and wouldn’t complain to her family. We finally managed to divert her with a discussion into differences between the various sectors and planets.
‘I’ve got a cousin on Jason in Gamma sector,’ said Krath. ‘I wore a green top when I went to visit him, and I wasn’t allowed out of Jason Off-world until I changed into something else. They think green is a terribly unlucky colour.’
‘You should always look up a world’s social conventions before you go there,’ said Dalmora. ‘It’s terribly easy to make a mistake