Kendall Ryan

The Impact of You


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so I’ll go.’

      His jaw tenses as he bites back whatever he wants to say. He steers Stacia by the elbow toward the door. ‘Avery and I need to study.’

      Stacia pouts but lets him guide her out into the hall.

      Once the door is firmly shut, I look at Jase. ‘Are you sure it’s okay I’m here?’ I ask.

      He laughs uneasily and crosses the room toward me. ‘You’re saving my ass right now. So thank you.’

      ‘How?’

      ‘By helping me get rid of Stacia. She’d hang out all afternoon if I let her.’

      I rise from the bed, wondering if he doesn’t want company and if I should head out too. ‘Oh…did you want me to…’

      His firm hands on my shoulders stop me from going any farther. ‘I want you to stay.’

      The warm weight of his hands is a constant reminder that I’m not as immune to his charms as I’d like. I smile up at him like a lovesick fangirl. Idiot. I silently berate myself that I’ve joined the Jase fan club. ‘Okay.’

      ‘Sit. Stay. Get comfortable.’

      I sink down to his bed once again, chemistry crackling between us, no matter how much I might want to deny it. ‘Okay.’

      ‘I’ve got psych homework I could do. And you can hide out here, so just relax, alright?’

      I want to ask him more about Stacia, but that may lead him to ask why I was hiding, so I zip it and relax on his large queen-sized bed. It’s much more plush and comfy than my narrow rock-hard mattress back at the dorms. Mmm. His bed smells like him. It’s a scent I instantly decide could be bottled and sold.

      Jase turns on soft music and grabs his textbook and a stack of papers from the desk, balancing everything on his lap so he can face me. I grab the book from my early childhood development class and bravely settle back against his mountain of pillows. My eyes dart up to Jase’s but he doesn’t seem to mind in the least that I’ve commandeered his bed. In fact, I swear there’s a hint of smile tugging his lips.

      ‘So what’s your major?’ he asks.

      ‘Social work. What about you?’ For some reason I expect him to say undecided, but he surprises me.

      ‘Psychology. Mostly because it pisses my dad off.’

      ‘What do you mean?’

      He grins. ‘He’s a mayor and wants to make a run for congress. He’s always been obsessed with politics…so of course he wanted me to major in political science, or at least business.’

      I nod. My dads didn’t really care what my major was. And when I told them I wanted to work in the adoption field, they helped me research the social work program.

      ‘It was either that or something artistic, and since I’m shit at art and just okay at music, I figured psychology was a safe bet.’

      ‘Do you at least like your classes?’ I ask.

      ‘Yeah, turns out I love it. People are the most interesting thing to me anyway, so it worked out.’

      ‘Did you succeed in pissing off your dad?’

      He nods. ‘Oh yeah. He blew a gasket.’

      We both smile. Why do I get the feeling that Jase is letting me in on things he doesn’t normally share? And why do I like it so much? I focus on my book for a few minutes, but reading about attachment disorder is pretty dry, and Jase’s mouthwatering goodness is right there on display. It’s hard not to sneak glances at him from time to time. A tiny crease marks his brow as he concentrates, and his lips move when he reads – something he makes look both adorable and sexy at the same time.

      ‘So, Stacia’s really your ex?’

      ‘Yeah. But she doesn’t act like it. And of course my frat brothers give me shit about it all the time.’

      It’s clear she’d like to take a ride on Jase, ex or not. Hell, maybe she still does, like she implied. I force my eyes back to my book and relax into the inviting bedding. After a few moments of trying my damnedest to read this textbook, I feel Jase’s eyes on me again.

      ‘Do you ever think about meeting your…um, the lady that gave birth to you?’ he asks, his brows pulled together.

      ‘My birthmom?’ I was used to teaching people the correct terminology. He nods.

      ‘Yeah. All the time, actually.’

      ‘So why don’t you?’

      I shrug. Lots of reasons. I’m not sure how much I should tell him, or how much he really wants to know, but Jase is leaning forward on his elbows, like he’s genuinely interested. I don’t typically talk about this stuff. But I trust him enough to let him in, which is odd given that I’ve only known him such a short time and everyone has warned me about him. ‘Now that I’m nineteen, I can go and get the records from my adoption without my dads needing to sign off …’ I release a slow sigh. It’s something I’ve thought about doing so many times, yet some unknown force holds me back.

      ‘It’s not a big deal. I’ll figure out what to do eventually,’ I add, hoping to lighten the moment.

      ‘Well, let me know if I can help,’ he says softly.

      ‘Why would you do that?’

      He shrugs. ‘Why not?’

      I’m genuinely baffled by his interest in helping me. I know I’m not the best company, only Jase doesn’t seem to mind. That’s probably because he doesn’t know much about me. I duck my head at this realization, drawing my chin to my chest. ‘You wouldn’t like me if you knew more about my past.’

      He doesn’t press for details. He just remains quiet and reaches for my hand. ‘I doubt that could be true. And besides, I have waaay more baggage than you, so we’re good.’

      Yes, but his reputation is out in the open. He isn’t hiding behind a curtain, waiting for some horrible big-reveal like I am. Jase is still watching me and his soft expression sends a warm tingling through my chest. I have no idea why it is that Jase Owens – reported manwhore – would have this effect on me. Yet I can’t deny that he does. Which is exactly why I’ll need to be extra careful around him.

      I blink my eyes open to find Jase standing above me. ‘Avery, wake up. You fell asleep.’ His hand on my shoulder gently rouses me. What? Noooo. I shoot up in the bed, stunned and bleary-eyed. I fell asleep? This is so not me. ‘I should go.’ I leap up from the bed and grab my backpack, hefting it up over one shoulder. ‘Do you have class?’

      Jase casually looks at his alarm clock. ‘My psych class started twenty minutes ago. I didn’t want to wake you.’

      Oh. ‘Jase, don’t skip class for me.’

      Jase steps closer, closing the distance between us. I have to crane my neck to look up at him, and my pulse spikes at the sudden closeness. ‘It’s okay.’ He straightens the backpack straps, his hand lingering on my shoulders. ‘This was more fun.’

      What is okay about any of this, I have no idea. His gaze lingers on mine. I should move away, but I won’t. ‘Can you afford to miss class?’

      He lets out a short laugh. ‘I’m not dumb, Avery. I had a near perfect grade-point average last semester. And it’s only the second week of class. It’s fine.’

      My surprised expression gives me away.

      ‘What? Not what you expected?’

      I turn and flee without another word, needing to use my body for something useful like descending the stairs so I don’t do something stupid like lift up on my toes and kiss him like I want to. Once we reach the front door, Jase grabs my backpack, halting my escape.

      ‘Hey, stay out from behind dumpsters,