Alternatively you could try saying “Hi!” It might turn out to be friendly. You never know!
Dear Mouse,
Learn some kind of social skill. For instance you could:
Walk on your hands. But do make sure you are wearing clean knickers without any holes!
Juggle with plates. Though maybe oranges would be safer, just to begin with.
Belch in time to God Save the Queen. This would soon get people’s attention!
Try any of these and before you know it everyone will be desperate to talk to you!
Dear Katie,
I thought your answers to my problems were really funny! I love the idea of belching in time to God Save the Queen. I have tried doing it but I can’t belch! Lily can. She does it all the time and says it is quite easy. She has tried to teach me but all I do is gulp down air and make myself ill. Lily says I am useless. She says I have no social skills at all.
When are your parties that you are going to? I don’t know whether Lily and me will have a party this year. Last year when we had one Lily got hyper and threw Ribena all over the wall and trod on a glass and smashed the banisters. How she smashed the banisters, she was pretending to ride a horse. She was going “Giddyap, giddyap,” and kicking at the banister rails. Mum and Dad were just so furious with her! Mum said she was a vandal and Dad said she ought to live in a hole at the bottom of the garden. So I don’t know whether we will have one this year. But I want to hear all about your ones!
My news is that I am going to go on the London Eye. I think this will be quite exciting! I am going with a friend from school called Debbie. Her dad is taking us. I just hope I don’t get sick, which is what I usually do. Like one time when Dad took us on a Giant Octopus where you sat in this little pod thing at the end of a long arm, and the arm went up in the air like a big wheel and at the same time the little pod thing whizzed round and round incredibly fast. It made me feel sick as sick! I just couldn’t wait to get off. And then when I did, you’ll never guess what… I instantly threw up all over Lily! Boy, was she ever mad! But the Eye moves really s… I…o… w… I… y, so that you hardly even notice, so maybe I will be all right. I would not like to throw up over Debbie’s dad!
Here is a pattern I have done for Girlzone.
How to sew yourself a groovy cushion cover:
What you will need:
One of your dad’s shirts (if he will let you have one. If not, see if he has put one out for rags. Do not use one of his best ones!!!)
Needle and thread
Stuff for filling
What to do:
1. Lay the shirt flat.
2. Chop off the top bit, from underneath the arms. Chuck this bit away.
3. Take the bit that’s left and turn it inside out.
4. Sew the two sides together.
5. Open the buttons and turn it back the right way.
6. Stuff with rags or cotton wool.
7. Hide a dog’s squeaky toy inside and do up the buttons.
You now have a groovy cushion that will make a loud squeeeeek! when anyone sits on it. Fun for parties!
I have not tried this out as I am not very good at sewing, but I think it would be quite easy.
Anyway, we can use it if you want. We don’t have to.
Please tell me about your parties. Did you get your top that you wanted? And your jeans and the trainers?
Luv from Violet xxxxxxxxxx
PS Next I am going to do a Short story!
Dear Katie,
Here is a short story. Hope you like it.
Luv Violet
PS What happened about your sponsored walk? How many miles did you do? Tell me and we will send you the money!
BETSY BURP, by Violet Alexander
A story in 4 parts
Part 1
Once upon a time there were two sisters. One of them was called Nasturtium, the other was called Geranium. Nasturtium was known as Nasty, while Geranium was known as Gerry
Nasty was quite nasty. She could often be really mean to her sister.
Gerry was quite merry! At least, she was when Nasty wasn’t being nasty to her.
One day when the girls came home from school their mother said, “Guess what? I have just seen a notice in the Radio Times about a singing contest. It is going to be on television, in front of millions of viewers! The viewers will vote who is the winner, and they will be given a contract with a big record company and become famous overnight. Gerry, you have a nice loud voice! Why don’t you enter the contest?”
“I will!” cried Gerry. “What a cool idea! I will sing my favourite song and perhaps I will win and become famous!”
Nasty sniffed and said, “Dream on!”
She was just jealous because her mum had not said that she had a nice loud voice. Nasty did have a loud voice, as a matter of fact, but it wasn’t very nice. Whenever she started to sing people would stuff their fingers in their ears and go “Ow!” and “Ouch!” and “This is so painful!”
But Nasty was of the opinion she had a perfectly wonderful voice. Far better than her sister’s.
“I will go in for the contest as well,” she thought. “But I will not tell her.”
Part 2
The day of the singing contest arrived. Gerry was so nervous she didn’t want to eat anything, but her mum said she must or she would feel faint.
“Nasty,” she said, “go and make your sister a sandwich.”
“Oh, if I must,” said Nasty.
Nasty made the sandwich out of hard-boiled eggs, all mashed up with salt and pepper, oil of cloves, mustard, soya sauce, tomato ketchup, and… garlic! Six whole cloves of it. Yeeeeurgh!
“Tee hee!” thought Nasty. “This sandwich will make her puke, for sure!”
But Gerry was in such a state she didn’t even notice.
“Is it all right?” said Nasty.
“Yes. Thank you. It is very yummy,” said Gerry, wondering why Nasty was suddenly being so nice to her.
After she had eaten the sandwich, Gerry and her mum left for the TV studio. On the way there Gerry came over a bit peculiar, but she thought that it was just nerves.
“Once I start to sing,” she thought, “I will feel better.”
She was going to sing her favourite song, Love ya, baby! These were the words: