utterly alone, as she had been since his departure for Paris. Tears filled her eyes again and at last seemed to provide Paul with an unspoken cue, for he relented. He moved forward, took her in his arms and held her tightly.
Throughout the morning, as word spread, people called at the shop to welcome him home. After Mr Laufer had insisted on a celebratory drink, Ida pulled Paul into the kitchen. ‘Please, not today. I haven’t seen you for so long. We must spend at least a day alone as a family.’
‘It’s only a toast. Surely you don’t want me to offend him?’
They heard another knock.
‘More drinks?’
‘What do you expect me to do? Tell them to go home? Some are customers. The war will end soon and we’ll need them to come back to us.’
‘Then let’s go to the coast. We can celebrate when we get back. We’ll have two or three days alone. Tell your friends to organise a party here at the shop.’
It was soon settled. Someone offered to lend his horse and wagon for their trip. ‘Could you take us to the station instead?’ Paul asked.
It was nearly dusk when they reached Sarkau. There was only one inn. A sign informed travellers that it was closed. Paul knocked anyway. A woman opened the door and pointed to the sign. ‘Can’t you read?’
‘I’m here with my family. We have nowhere else to go.’
‘We’re closed.’ She began to shut the door.
‘I’ve just returned from Paris,’ Paul said. ‘We need a room for two nights.’ He knew she wouldn’t refuse a soldier.
‘Very well. We’re expecting family at the end of the week.’ She opened the door and pointed up the stairs. ‘The two rooms at the top on the right.’
The following morning the family followed a snowy pathway through the pine forest towards the sea. Halfway there they climbed a small rise and a series of dunes came into view. Covered with snow, they looked like giant cumulus clouds turned upside-down and tethered to the ground. Beyond, waves lapped the shore. Karl ran ahead, climbing to the top of the highest dune, Peter behind him, trying to keep up with his brother. Surrounded by dunes, with the water stretching as far as he could see, Karl felt as though he had reached the end of the earth.
Later, as they walked back through the forest to the inn, Paul asked Ida why she had been so quiet all afternoon: ‘You hardly said a word on the train.’
‘I don’t like the games you’re playing.’
‘What are you talking about?’
‘You come home and can’t bring yourself to kiss me.’
‘You’re not the only one who’s hurting.’
‘I’m scared,’ she said.
‘Of what?’
‘I don’t know… of what’s going to happen. It doesn’t seem like the war will lead to anything great.’
‘It won’t last for ever. I’ll be home for good soon.’
‘That’s what you said when you went to Paris.’
‘Well, you don’t seem to want me here anyway.’
Ida didn’t answer. Paul slid his hand round her waist. This time it was Ida who pulled away, but when he persisted she laid her hand on his and their fingers interlocked.
On the morning of their departure for Germau the family walked silently to the road to flag down a vehicle going to Cranz to catch the train home. Ever since Paul could remember, the spit protruding from the northern shore of the peninsula had been a national park, closed to traffic, but while he had been in Paris a new road had been built through the middle for the heavy military traffic that went back and forth to Memel. Three trucks passed them without stopping. When the fourth approached, Paul stepped into the road. The driver and he exchanged a few words, then they all climbed into the cramped cab. Inside the air was stuffy and too warm. Ida rolled down the window a crack.
The driver was young, a boy almost, from Hesse. He soon became talkative, attempting to impress the higher-ranked Paul. He spoke with an accent Ida and the children found odd, but his words were clear enough.
‘It’s my first time in East Prussia. I never realised how far from home it is.’
‘Were you in France?’ Paul asked.
‘No, I was sent straight here.’
Karl and Peter sat quietly between the driver and their parents. Paul held Leyna on his lap. Ida watched the military trucks going north through the pine forest, which had been planted on the wide sandy spit in the late nineteenth century to prevent it from being washed away by the sea.
The family returned home for the party in Paul’s honour. Talk focused on everyone’s plans for after the war. The mood was subdued. Most of the older men seemed certain the war would soon be over, but Paul wouldn’t be drawn.
On the morning of his departure the children followed him and Ida as they walked to the station. The next day Paul was due at a base in Poland. He didn’t know when or if he would be permitted another leave. On the platform, he kissed Ida and the children. He was preoccupied, as if his military duties were more important now than his family, but he had always been like that when he was thinking about work. Now, though, he wasn’t just going to work in the shop behind their home, he was leaving for a month, a year, two years? No one knew.
His father’s indifference that morning stuck in Karl’s mind. The train pulled away, clanking along the tracks. Ida and the children were left alone on the platform to watch it disappear from view. They remained staring down the narrowing tracks long after the train vanished, as an uncanny calmness similar to the silence that follows the first heavy snow each year enveloped the family. Leyna tugged at her mother’s hand. Their sister’s movement caused the boys to glance up at their mother. ‘I want to go home,’ she said.
They walked down the steps from the platform, across the steel tracks slick with ice and to the path in the field. There, they fell into single file. A light snow began to fall. Karl, at the back, stopped to look up. The uniform sky provided nothing against which to distinguish itself as a sheet of ashen grey slowly descended over them. He tried to separate a single cloud from the mass so he could imagine the snow falling from that particular place, but the sky offered no depth of field, refusing to cooperate with Karl’s wish for something to recognise. The snowfall grew heavier, causing even the backdrop of the pallid sky to disappear in a white flurry.
Ida stopped to adjust her hat, leaned down and picked up Leyna.
When they reached the road, the cobbles were buried under a thin layer of fresh snow, which highlighted the imperfections in the road’s surface.
Tirskone, an elderly man from Powayen, the village nearest the station, often walked along the road with a shovel and a bucket of sand with which he smoothed the ground beneath an uneven cobble or poured sand into an empty hole before he inserted a new one. He kept stacks of stones in the brush at intervals along the roadside. Each year a government truck came from Königsberg and left a pile that Tirskone would move, five at a time, to his hiding places. Once Karl had crouched in the bushes to watch him.
Tirskone, like Paul, rarely spoke. When he did it was to make a request, delivered as an order, for a drink of water while he repaired the cobbles in the square. Now Karl glanced up and down the road, expecting to see the old man’s footprints: light snow rarely kept Tirskone indoors.
‘Let’s take the road this time. I don’t want to walk back through the forest while it’s snowing,’ Ida said.
Karl’s eyes were on the low hill that led into Germau less than a kilometre away. ‘Can I take the path?’ he asked.
‘Don’t be long.’
Ida glanced at Peter, shivering beside her. ‘You can come with me,’ she said. ‘You can