have sworn had healed until she walked through the door. He didn’t want the memories that sliced through him. He didn’t want to remember what it was like to want her.
Never again would he let her fool him into believing she cared about him. He was no longer an innocent boy just out of a state home, but a grown man who’d seen enough betrayal and deceit to know the world could be ugly.
When she didn’t budge, he made his voice glacial. “I don’t want your help. I don’t want you in my home. I don’t want you. Is that clear enough? Blunt enough?”
Cassidy’s pale face turned whiter, leaving blotchy red patches of anger and humiliation on her cheeks. Her lips narrowed, their fullness pulled into a taut line of distress. As she stood, she didn’t say a word. With surprising strength, she lifted the box, turned it upside down and dumped the contents onto the floor at his feet.
Papers, a diary and photographs spilled into a messy pile. Jake ignored the papers and watched Cassidy, finally realizing he’d gone too far. But he couldn’t find the words to say so. Too many conflicting emotions made his mouth dry, and words of apology stuck in his throat.
With her head high, her shoulders back, her chin up, her spine ramrod straight, Cassidy strode from the room with the empty carton. And although Jake had gotten exactly what he’d intended, he felt no triumph. She’d left him with an empty house and an empty heart.
CASSIDY WOULD NOT SOB. Not here where he might see her. So she held her breath all the way out of Jake’s house and down the walk. She didn’t dare inhale until she reached her car. Finally as tears tightened the back of her throat, she took air into her starving lungs in one big rush.
She would not cry for the boy she’d once called a friend. She would not spill tears over the harsh man who’d replaced him. She would not think about the reasons that caused the confident young friend she recalled to turn into the cynical man she’d seen today.
She would not cry.
No, you’ll just run away, her conscience needled her.
He told me to leave so he could brood in private.
He was your best friend. A good friend. How could you leave such an intriguing hunk alone when there are so many other possibilities?
He was like a big brother.
Didn’t you ever think of consoling him? All that wonderful anger could be put to good use.
Sure. I’ll just sprinkle fairy dust over him and he’ll turn from an old friend into the perfect lover.
I see you prefer crying.
I’m not crying.
Cassidy tossed the box into the car and angrily wiped away the solitary tear running from the corner of her eye.
That Jake had grown into such a handsome man hadn’t surprised her. She’d always admired his whiskey-colored eyes, olive skin and black hair. But during the past ten years, he’d grown another few inches, towering over her five foot eight, and his features had sharpened. The hollows under his cheekbones had grown deeper. His eyes glittered with an intensity that almost made her shiver. The changes in his eyes bothered her the most. Eyes that she recalled as warm and friendly as a puppy’s now burned with amber fire. Even outside in the breezy Gulf air, she could still recall their blazing heat.
However, she would not think about the pain of betrayal she’d seen in his eyes when she’d told him that her father had had the answers that he’d so desperately sought. If only her father were still alive so he could explain his actions. Despite what Jake thought, she knew her father had been a good man. He must have had an honorable reason for his seemingly inexplicable actions.
Cassidy had never told Jake that her father had insisted that she follow her dream of college and law school and had discouraged her from considering Jake as anything more than a friend. Jake would have assumed that his poor background and lack of family and education were the reason Frazier had insisted that his daughter attend college as she’d always planned. And Cassidy couldn’t hurt Jake with something he’d had no control over.
Even at eighteen she’d understood why her father wanted her to follow her dream of becoming a lawyer and not give up like Cassidy’s mother had. Her parents had married during law school. After her mother had become pregnant, she’d dropped out of school, and while she’d always intended to return, she never had. Her mother had put her dream on hold—and then she’d died. And her father insisted that Cassidy put her education first.
So she hadn’t let herself become involved with Jake for the sake of a dream. Cassidy’s goal was to practice law. Jake’s dream was to have a family. To him family meant everything—especially since he’d never had one. And he never ever took relationships casually, because he’d had so few people who’d cared about him. Because Cassidy didn’t trust herself with Jake, because she couldn’t let their friendship change, she’d deliberately chosen to stop any further feelings from developing between them.
She’d always looked at Jake as a brother, and they’d kept that platonic friendship until she’d left for college.
When a slip of paper that hadn’t fallen from the box earlier wafted into the air on a gust, Cassidy snatched the paper by instinct and crushed it. She didn’t care if that paper had the names, addresses and social-security numbers of both of Jake’s sisters. No way would she return to that house. She couldn’t face another of Jake’s rebuffs.
He’d made it very clear that she wasn’t wanted, and Cassidy wouldn’t stay and help now if he came out on his knees and begged. That image brought a slight upward quirk to her lips. The thought of Jake Cochran begging anyone was a ludicrous image.
A bit calmer, Cassidy slipped behind the steering wheel, the paper still crumpled in her fingers. She backed out of the drive, letting the wheels squeal as she turned a sharp corner, eager to leave behind the disturbing image of an angry Jake. But she couldn’t relax the tension in her shoulders even after she passed out of sight of Jake’s house.
What had happened to him? She mourned the loss of the young man she’d known, recalling their short time together with a fondness that couldn’t have been totally one-sided. They’d been good friends, sharing their dreams and hopes for the future. She’d told Jake how she wanted to follow in her father’s footsteps and become a lawyer. He’d spoken of finding his family and joining Special Forces. They’d rarely argued, and she recalled a unique closeness. She’d thought of him as the older brother she’d always wanted and never had. Or were her memories skewed? She’d always believed Jake had liked her. But maybe he’d just used her friendship in an attempt to get to her father. If that had been his plan, he’d failed. To her knowledge, her father had never spoken to anyone about the adoptions. Not even to her.
Remembering she needed to pick up a few things, Cassidy stopped for gas and bought fresh milk at the convenience store. She ran the car through the wash and checked the tires for air before slipping back behind the wheel. She headed for home, determined to ignore Jake and his problems.
Cassidy stopped at a red light and started to toss the crumpled paper she’d left on the seat into the trash. But she noticed writing on the paper and looked more carefully. Numbers. A ten-digit phone number.
Curious, Cassidy punched the numbers into her car phone. As the light turned green, a bored-sounding female voice answered. “Password, please.”
Password?
Behind Cassidy, a car honked. “Hold on a sec.”
She pulled off the road and parked, then stared at the yellowed slip of paper while the bored voice requested again, “Password, please.”
Cassidy flipped over the paper and read the scrawled script aloud, “Blow back?”
She heard several clicks and then a different voice said, “One moment.”
Pleased with herself, Cassidy waited, wondering who would answer the other end of the line. She waited at least a minute or two and was about to hang up when a harried