best horse behind without knowing if she’d ever be able to afford to bring him home, and everything was fast catching up on her. Not to mention the fact that she’d missed the funeral service of the one person in the world she really cared about, because she’d been stuck in a hospital on the other side of the world. Her granddad had been her only family since her mom had died, and she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was an orphan now. And the fact she hadn’t had the chance to say goodbye to him.
“Is there anything I can do for you? I’m not really sure what your arrangement was with my granddad, but you’re welcome to stay for as long as you want.”
It wasn’t that she particularly wanted anyone hanging around, but from the information she’d received to date, she was going to need the income from the cottage just to keep paying the bills. And from what she’d heard, this guy was paying a small fortune in rent. He wasn’t exactly hard to look at, either—brown eyes flecked with gold, dark hair that was a little too long and a smile that made her want to stare at his mouth way longer than she should have.
“I won’t get in your way, I just wanted to say hi,” he told her. “I’m Nathan.”
“Jessica,” she replied, holding out her hand and pressing her palm to his. “But I’m guessing you already knew that.”
“Not a day went past that Jock didn’t talk about you, so yeah.” He pushed his hands into his jean pockets and took a step backward. “I’ll see you around, Jessica. Take care.”
Jessica smiled and raised one hand in a half wave, wishing he hadn’t just surprised her so soon after arriving. Any other day she’d have been better prepared, would have remembered her manners and invited him in for a coffee just like her grandfather would have, but today was tough. Today was about coming to terms with losing everything. Tomorrow she’d try to start rebuilding, and figure out how the hell she was going to save the only place that had ever been home to her. Trouble was, she was used to being a loner, so it was weird having someone she didn’t know staying on the property.
She watched him go, the casual way he sauntered off toward the stables, hands still thrust in his pockets, as if he didn’t have a worry in the world. Everything felt like it was crashing around her, but she had to stay strong, needed to hold herself together, because that was what her granddad would have expected, and she didn’t want to let him down.
* * *
Nathan Bell gave the horse a pat and dropped to the ground, nudging his hat down lower over his head, crossing his ankles and shutting his eyes. The sun was warm but not too hot, and he was feeling lazy as hell. He knew Patch wouldn’t walk off on him, and he just needed to try to catch up on some sleep. Since Jock had died, his insomnia had come back, and right now he was beat.
He was always worse at night, the memories of finding his wife, the weight of what had happened, always seeking him out in the dark. During the day, he usually managed to keep them at bay, but forgetting what had happened was impossible.
He’d just drifted off, was falling into the sleep he’d been craving, when he received a sharp kick in the leg.
“Ouch!”
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
Nathan pushed his hat up and found himself staring straight up at Jessica. What the hell was he doing? What the hell was she doing? Her eyes looked wild, face mad as hell. At least it took his mind off his nightmares.
“I was sleeping, but I’m guessing you already figured that out,” he said, drawing one of his legs up and rubbing the spot where she’d kicked him. He had no idea what he’d done to make her so angry between now and when he’d met her.
“I mean what the hell are you doing here? And with my granddad’s horse?”
She was seriously pissed with him, that much was obvious, and he doubted he was going to get back to sleep anytime soon. Nathan tried not to smile—she’d looked pretty when he’d met her at the house, even with her tearstained cheeks, but she was gorgeous as sin all fired up and angry.
“Jock used to bring me here, as soon as he’d taught me to ride,” Nathan told her, wishing she’d back a step up instead of standing over him and glaring like he’d just stolen something from her. “And the last few weeks before he passed away he wasn’t up to riding, so he asked me to take Patch out for him.”
“I don’t believe you.” Her tone was cool as ice.
Nathan wasn’t going to engage, not when she was so mad with him. He stood up, reaching for her hand then stopping when she snatched it away before he even came close to connecting with her.
“I know that you’re hurting right now, but I’m not the one you should be angry at. I get that this was a special spot for you and Jock, because he told me so, and if he were here right now he’d tell you himself that you’re acting crazy. We rode up here almost every day together.”
A look passed over her face that he couldn’t read, but the anger disappeared from her eyes like a light going out. He understood that the place was special to her—the wooded hill area tucked away from the rest of the property was like a little slice of paradise hidden away from the world. Somewhere she was obviously used to enjoying in privacy. But he hadn’t done anything wrong, and grieving or not, he wasn’t going to let her take it out on him. If there was one thing her granddad had taught him, it was that just because you were grieving you didn’t have leave to behave badly.
“He told you that?” Her voice was softer now. “That it was our special place?”
“Yeah, he did,” Nathan replied. “Now why don’t you sit down and we can talk, if you’re done being angry with me?”
She didn’t apologize but she did look guilty, and he wasn’t going to rub salt into open wounds. He knew what it was like to lose someone.
“I didn’t think anyone else had been here, which I guess is kind of stupid,” Jessica said, wiping the corners of her eyes as she sat down across from him amongst the pine needles. “We started coming here when I was a girl, and it was kind of our thing. He always rode Patch, and I was on my old pony, Whiskers.”
Nathan nodded, sitting down beside her and stretching his legs back out. He watched as she grimaced, obviously trying to make herself comfortable, but he didn’t say anything.
“I hear you had a pretty good hideout, too. Something about a fort that you thought your mom never knew about up in the trees.”
Jessica met his gaze, laughed softly and shook her head. “Now I know you’re not lying,” she said, “because I still believe that no one else knew about that little hideaway.”
He held his hand to his chest. “Cross my heart, I won’t tell another soul.”
She leaned back and stared at the horses, and Nathan did the same.
“Patch must be so old now. He was perfect for my granddad, like they understood exactly what the other was thinking. I’ve never seen anyone else ride him, not ever.” She sighed. “That’s why it hit me so bad, seeing you. He’s been on the farm since I was a little girl.”
Nathan chuckled. “Yeah, which is why he’s perfect for me. He’s content just to take things slow and teach a newbie the ropes.” He paused, watched her, wished he didn’t feel so uncomfortable being so close to her. “We came up here a lot, the two of us, just to ride and chat, talk about anything and everything. It was as good for me as it was for the old man.”
Jessica groaned when she turned to her side, and he waited a second before saying anything more. It was none of his business, but he’d heard so much about her, knew about what had happened, and she was clearly in pain. Jock had been a good friend to him, a mentor, and he missed him more than she could ever imagine. Which meant that he wanted to help Jessica, if he could get past his own demons long enough to do so.
“Sounds like you were close friends. I shouldn’t have reacted so