he’d secured his own apartment. He’d driven down Andie’s street a couple of times, usually in the middle of the night when he couldn’t sleep. He longed to confide in her about the fire. To get the guilt off his chest. But he figured she’d just laugh at him. After the way he’d hurt her, she couldn’t possibly care about the demons haunting him.
Most nights, he noticed a light on in the front bedroom of her house. Matt wasn’t sure whose room it was. When they’d first married, Andie had suffered from insomnia and usually sat up reading when she couldn’t sleep. But Davie was a wild card. Maybe the boy was scared of the dark and needed a light on while he slept. Matt longed to get to know his little son. Was the boy shy or brave? Was he athletic or a bookworm? It didn’t matter one way or the other. Davie was his, and Matt loved the child unconditionally for no other reason.
“See ya.”
The boy hung up before Matt could say goodbye. He felt a buzz of excitement. He’d been invited to dinner at Andie’s house. Thank goodness she wasn’t going to fight his visitations of Davie. He’d take it slow and easy, trying to soften Andie’s heart. The last thing he wanted was to upset his wife and cause a scene in front of their son.
Matt cleaned up and dressed in faded jeans, a blue polo shirt and tennis shoes. He used to wear cutoffs or shorts when he worked out, but no more. The scars on his legs weren’t pretty.
After brushing his teeth, he combed his hair. It was getting longer than he liked. Time to find a good barber in town.
As an afterthought, he splashed a bit of cologne on his face, gritting until the sting passed. Before leaving his apartment, he reached for two packages he had sitting on the kitchen table. He’d bought and wrapped them two days ago, waiting for the right moment to present them to Andie and Davie. Then he drove to Andie’s house on the other side of town, feeling anxious and giddy at the same time.
“You must be crazy,” he murmured to himself as he put on the blinker, then turned the corner. Being around Andie was suicide, flooding him with regret. He could hardly believe she hadn’t told Davie negative things about him. Matt figured most women would bad-mouth their estranged husband. But not Andie.
He parked out front, his gaze taking in the house, white with green trim. A classic forest ranger’s house. Andie paid rent and maintained the home, but she didn’t own the house. That’s how it worked in the forest service.
The flower beds had been freshly raked of dead leaves. He knew Andie hadn’t been in town much longer than him, and he guessed she’d started bringing the yard back to life in preparation for spring planting. He expected nothing less. Andie had a green thumb; her academic training had been in plants and minerals. Which worked well with her ranger district, filled with mining and grazing permittees. She knew her job well, and he couldn’t help feeling proud of her accomplishment in becoming a forest ranger. A rare breed of only four hundred nationwide.
As he carried the packages up the front steps, Matt caught the tantalizing aroma of dinner cooking. His stomach rumbled and he rang the doorbell.
The sound of running feet came from inside, and then the door jerked open. Davie stood there wearing his Rocketman cape, pajamas and floppy-eared dog slippers. Matt couldn’t help wondering if the boy ever took off the cape.
“Hi!” Davie pushed open the screen door, but Matt didn’t step inside.
“Is your mom here?”
“Who is it, Davie?” Andie’s voice came from the kitchen.
“It’s Matt,” the boy yelled back.
Andie appeared in the doorway, wiping her hands on a dish towel. She looked casual in faded blue jeans and a T-shirt, her slender feet bare. That’s what he liked most about this woman. No fuss or muss, in spite of her penchant for neatness. Memories of their life together flashed through Matt’s mind and left him filled with such yearning that he longed to go back in time and undo his decision to walk away. Andie in their kitchen fixing dinner. Andie out in the garden, weeding her tomato plants. Andie with her hair curled and smelling divine as he took her out for a night on the town.
When she saw Matt, her eyes widened. “What are you doing here?”
“I—I—” Matt stammered in confusion.
“I invited him. You said I could.” The screen door creaked as Davie pushed it wide.
“I did?” Andie stared at her son, and her knuckles whitened around the dish towel.
“Yeah, I asked if I could invite a friend over for dinner and you said yes.” Two deep furrows creased Davie’s brow. He looked at his mother like she’d gone daft.
Oh, no. Obviously there’d been a misunderstanding. Matt had known the invitation to dinner was too good to be true.
He shifted the gifts in his left arm, leaning his weight on the cane with his right hand. “Looks like we’ve both been duped by a five-year-old. I didn’t mean to intrude. I can come back another time.”
Anger smoldered in her eyes, her gaze darting between the packages and his face. His pulse hitched into triple time. The last thing he wanted was to upset Andie. He took a step back, planning to bid her farewell and return later when she didn’t feel ambushed. Instead, he stumbled and almost fell down the steps. A wrenching cry broke from his lips as he dropped the gifts into the flower bed. His cane clattered to the porch and he staggered against the railing, panting hard.
“Matt!” Andie reached for him.
He bent his head so she wouldn’t see the agony in his eyes. The excruciating pain and humiliation.
“Are you okay?”
She hovered beside him, her hands clutching his arm. The warmth of her fingers sent electric shockwaves over his body. He liked the worried tone of her voice, but didn’t want her pity. It’d been a long time since someone had worried about him, but he wouldn’t use tricks to win her back. He hadn’t planned to be so clumsy or for his leg to hurt like lightning bolts hurtling through his thigh. He wanted to be strong. To be everything for his family.
“I’m f-fine. Just let—let me catch my breath.” He clenched his jaw, fighting off waves of pain.
She pulled a wicker chair over for him to sit down on the porch. He fell back into the chair, breathing hard as he massaged his thigh muscle with his hand. How he hated showing her this weakness. Hated for her to ever know how he’d gotten to this point.
“Davie, get a cup of water,” she said.
While the boy raced inside, she knelt beside Matt, her hands clasping the armrest. “Do you need me to call 9-1-1? What can I do?”
He looked at her anguished face and gritted a smile. “You’ve done it already. Just give me a moment.”
Davie returned, looking serious as he sloshed water over the brim of a red sippy cup minus the lid. Matt chuckled as he accepted the boy’s offering.
“Thanks, Davie.” Matt drained the small cup in two long swallows. The pain eased by small degrees and his breathing calmed. In spite of the chilly air, sweat dripped from his forehead and he brushed it aside. Andie must have noticed because she stood, her expression severe.
“Do you feel well enough to come inside? I have a recliner where you can elevate your leg.”
Davie retrieved Matt’s cane and handed it to him.
“Sure. I’m fine.” He smiled at the boy, doing his best to reassure them both.
Andie took Matt’s arm and helped him inside while Davie held the door wide.
At the threshold, Matt hesitated. “I don’t want to play on your sympathies, Andie. I won’t come in unless you really want me here. My injury has nothing to do with our marriage.”
She bit her bottom lip and looked away, a dead giveaway to her apprehension. He’d learned to read her body language long ago and figured she hadn’t changed that