months he’d discovered Cassie was always jumping in to help cover shifts as needed.
Despite his attempts to keep his distance, he found himself curious about why she devoted so much time and energy to her work. He sensed she was using work as a distraction from not having a personal life, the same way he was.
He told himself the similarities between them didn’t matter, since he wasn’t interested in having a relationship.
“They should let you leave early,” he said with a frown. “You deserve to get some rest.”
“I’ll be fine,” she said with a wave of her hand. “I’ve doubled back before and it’s not too bad.”
He was hardly in a position to argue, since his job required him to be on call often. Too often, according to Victoria, who’d accused him of staying late at work on purpose. Had he? Looking back now, he had to admit there may have been a kernel of truth to Victoria’s accusations.
He thrust the useless guilt aside. “I’m going to get some rest in the call room, but page me if you need anything.”
“We will. But don’t worry, I promise we won’t bother you unless it’s important.”
For a moment he was taken aback by her statement. Was she actually trying to protect him? The concept was so foreign he could barely wrap his mind around it. “Call me anytime,” he corrected, before turning away.
The attending physicians’ call room was located just outside the neonatal intensive care unit, close enough for emergency situations but with enough soundproofing to be able to get some sleep.
Ryan kept his scrubs on as he stretched out on the narrow bed, so that he could rush out in a hurry for an emergency. He closed his eyes and took several deep breaths in an effort to relax.
Unfortunately, Cassie’s face, etched with the deeply caring expression he’d seen while feeding Barton, bloomed in his mind. He cursed under his breath, knowing that if he didn’t find a way to pry her out of his mind, he’d never get any sleep.
Too bad Cassie wasn’t the type to go for a nice sweaty bout of no-strings sex. Because unfortunately, since he’d destroyed his chance to have a family, that’s all he had left to offer.
Cassie groaned when her alarm went off at the ungodly hour of six o’clock in the morning. It felt as if she’d barely fallen asleep, as she’d tossed and turned until well past midnight, her thoughts darting from Dr. Ryan to Emma and back again. With a heavy sigh she dragged herself out of bed and stumbled toward the shower.
The hot water helped wake her up, although she wouldn’t be human until she’d downed her first cup of coffee. Since blow-drying her hair would take too long, she pulled it back into a ponytail and applied enough makeup to cover the dark circles beneath her eyes.
Volunteering to help out had seemed like a good idea at the time, but in the bright light of morning she couldn’t help wondering what in the world she’d been thinking.
Caring for Emma. That’s what she’d been thinking.
Staring at the empty coffeepot, she realized grimly that she hadn’t turned it on last night before crawling into bed. Feeling a bit desperate, she decided to stop at the local corner coffee shop before heading to the hospital.
The place was far more crowded than she’d have expected this early on a Friday morning. Although maybe the tourist crowd liked to get an early start. There wasn’t any drive-through service, not since someone had knocked over the post holding the intercom and speaker, so she took her place in line, hoping things would move quickly.
Of course, they didn’t. She glanced at her watch for the third time, thinking she should give up gourmet coffee for the icky stuff they brewed at work, when a second line opened up. “I can help the next person?” a woman called out.
The woman in front of Cassie darted over and she followed, figuring it would be quicker. Another person came up behind her and tapped her on the shoulder.
“Hey, Cass, how are you?”
Cassie glanced over her shoulder to see Gloria, her friend from the ER, standing behind her. “Good. How are you?”
“Fine. How’s our safe-haven baby?” Gloria asked in a low tone.
“Critical but stable,” she replied, knowing that the privacy laws prevented them from discussing patients. Although small towns like Cedar Bluff had a hard time with the concept of privacy. Everyone liked to meddle in everyone else’s business.
“Oh, I heard about that,” the woman in front of her said, turning around with her large coffee in hand. “Everyone’s trying to figure out who the mother is.”
Cassie shrugged and edged around the woman so she could place her order. “Large mocha coffee, please.” She glanced back at the nosy woman. “The mother has the right to be anonymous, so I doubt we’ll ever find out who she was. Besides, she did a good thing, giving her baby a chance at a better life.”
“Cassie’s right.” Gloria spoke up, flashing Cassie an apologetic smile. “We should be thankful. I’m sure someone will step forward to adopt the baby.”
“I guess you’re right,” the woman said, looking resigned at the fact she wasn’t getting any good information.
Cassie turned back to accept her coffee, wishing once again that she’d gone through the process of becoming a foster parent back when she’d first investigated the option. At the time she’d convinced herself the notion was a knee-jerk reaction to losing her baby and discovering her ex-husband’s betrayal. But if she had at least started the process, she’d be in a better position to adopt little Emma herself.
Was she crazy to even think of that as an option? Probably. But for some reason the idea wouldn’t go away.
Cassie took a bracing sip of her coffee and headed back out to her car. The drive to the hospital didn’t take long and she was still early enough to beat the worst of the traffic.
She stood by the elevator, sipping her coffee and thinking about the gossip that was already floating around about their safe-haven baby. If the mother was still around, she sincerely hoped the poor girl didn’t overhear people talking about her.
Several of her coworkers joined her at the elevator, although it was too early for idle chitchat. When the elevator stopped on the third floor, Cassie waited for the nurses closest to the door to get out first, before following suit.
As she stepped out of the elevator she caught a glimpse of an older woman with a cane entering the adjacent elevator. Was it the same woman who had been peering through the window of the door last evening? She tried to dart around her coworkers, but the action proved difficult, like a salmon swimming upstream. By the time she cleared the group, the elevator doors had closed.
She hesitated, wondering if she should take the stairs down to the lobby to verify it was the same woman from yesterday. But a glance at her watch made her grimace. There wasn’t enough time, she needed to punch in for her shift or she’d be late.
Besides, selfishly, she wanted to be sure Emma was assigned as her patient. So she hurried toward the door and swiped her ID badge over the electronic eye so she could get in.
Still carrying her coffee, she entered the staff lounge, where they generally congregated to make out the day’s assignments. After glancing up at the whiteboard, she relaxed. The charge nurse on duty had already listed her name as the nurse for both Emma and Barton.
She sipped her coffee, waiting for the rest of the assignments to be made. Should she call security? And report what? A suspicious woman in her early sixties who used a cane?
Yeah, right. She was being ridiculous. For all she knew, the woman getting into the elevator wasn’t the same one as the day before. And even if it was, so what? She’d mentioned she was here, visiting a patient. There were other units on the third floor besides the neonatal nursery.
Cassie pushed