the coffee after the first sip. That she couldn’t drink the coffee caused her to thoughtfully sit at the table for some long time, looking out of the window and indifferent to the charming mews the cat managed to fake.
When she continued to ignore him, he went over and yowled at her. It was not a nice expression, but he was hungry, and she wasn’t doing her duty to him.
Coldly, she looked at the cat and replied, “You could waddle around the house and catch a mouse or two.”
He stalked across the kitchen floor, out the cat door and caught a lizard in about ten minutes. He didn’t yowl the hunt cry but left the lizard’s feet and head on the porch. Then he went down the alley to see what else was available.
It was a pensive day for Jessica. She didn’t have the flu. She remembered her sister Alice throwing up the morning after her husband went to the Carolinas before going to the Middle East.
Alice’s air force husband, Phil, had flown in, and said nothing to her of the reason for the surprise visit. It was allegedly a practice takeoff and landing trip. But he’d called her. She’d met him, they’d made love in her car, on the road just outside the airport. And the next day, Alice knew she was pregnant. Everyone else had scoffed. Even Phil when Alice told him. But she was and she’d known the next day.
Jessica’s face softened. Was she?
She had a slow glass of milk and nothing else. Then she dressed in a distracted manner and walked indolently to the hotel. She wasn’t too sharp that morning.
But during that day, Jess knew exactly what Zach-ary Thomas was doing. She had a nurse she chatted with at the hospital. In the late afternoon, Jess called her. “How is Mr. Thomas?”
“He saw the boy before the harvesters took what they could. This is a tough time for Mr. Thomas. He’s at the funeral home sitting with his wife. Poor guy.”
The boy’s casket would be sealed.
Jess closed her books and told the manager, “I’m leaving early.”
And he replied, “Ummm,” without looking up.
So Jessica went over to the funeral home. And Zach was sitting in a chair near the open casket. He was deep in thought and didn’t actually hear Jessica sit down next to him.
He looked at her.
She said, “This is tough. I’m sorry you have such a burden of grief so far from home. Being alone at this time must be especially sad for you.”
His eyes were very serious. “I know what I did to you last night. I have no explanation for it. I apologize. Are you all right?”
“Of course.”
“I’ve told Hannah.”
“She’ll understand.”
“This has been such a nightmare. You gave me peace last night. I can’t understand my doing something like that to a stranger. To you.” He looked at Jessica and his eyes were troubled but clear. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
He sighed and looked away as he told her, “They’re harvesting. The minister was here for some time. I really don’t need anyone.”
She started to move to leave.
“Please stay.”
She sat back and was silent.
Then he asked her, “How will I get through all this without sealing it away in an emotional pus-like boil.”
She nodded. “That about describes grief. It could possibly help you to write it all down, how it happened, and put in your feelings and emotions. It could help you to face it all.
“A lot of people can’t communicate grief. You might sell such a sharing book. But if you never sell such a story, it’s okay. You will have dealt with the whole shebang, and it’s best to do it now.”
“She went so gently.”
So it was his wife for whom he grieved.
Thoughtfully, Zach added, “She was a good woman.”
Jessica replied, “She’ll make somebody a good guardian angel.”
“She’ll be looking after Mike.”
Jess agreed, “Probably. For a while. He may want to explore.”
Zach nodded. “Since he was taken, it is a comfort that she’ll be with him.”
That made Jess frown a little. The boy had to have been—what—eleven? Maybe twelve? Was that old enough to take care of himself? To distract her own self, Jess asked Zach, “What do you do for a living?”
“I’m a teacher.”
He should be reasonably solvent. She waited.
Then Zach told her,’ ‘We came on this trip together because I’m not at home much. This was to get me better acquainted with Mike.” Again Zach was silent before he asked, “Isn’t that ironic? Now I’ll never know him. But Hannah did. She was with him. She’s still with him.”
It was clear to Jessica that Zach was not especially good father material. If she really was pregnant with his baby, she’d go it all alone. She had no need to disrupt his life.
Well, from what he said, he hadn’t disrupted his life for a wife or child. He’d lived his life his way—and on his own.
She was somewhat surprised he was sitting next to his neglected wife so uselessly. She was dead. What good was he now? She’d needed attention from him when she was alive.
Jessica started to rise, and Zach rose with her. “Would you walk with me on the beach? Yesterday’s walk saved my sanity. I’m having a hard time assimilating the fact that I’m—alone.”
She looked at him quickly, but he was looking at the waxen face of his wife.
So he did grieve. Perhaps if he’d realized nothing in life is for sure, he might have made a better husband.
If she was pregnant with his child, she absolutely would raise it alone. He was useless.
But he was a human being. One who was in grief. Belatedly, he was aware of his loss.
She asked, “Are there any arrangements you need to make?”
“The hospital and the minister both advised and guided me on those needs. They are professionals. And they were very kind. It’s helped me.”
She thought he might be a little self-centered. Well, maybe not. Nobody could do anything to help his late wife and son. They were gone.
But the son’s contribution to the parts harvest had been allowed by the grieving father.
As if clued in by her thoughts, Zach just started in on speaking about his own thoughts. “Hannah would have loved helping others.”
Jess figured Hannah worked in charities.
Zach admitted, “I’m new to the word ‘harvest.‘ We were too late for her to help anybody. That would irritate her…not being able to help somebody else. I don’t remember ever discussing what we should do-in case.”
“Most of us feel we will live forever.”
By then, they were out of the chapel and walking along the sidewalk toward the beach.
Zach mentioned, “We’ll take the early plane home.”
“Yes.” She glanced over at him. He’d included his wife and son.
He was watching her, but as she looked at him, he looked away. He asked her, “Do you like your job?”
She grinned. “I’m brilliant with numbers.” Then she added logically, “Keeping books is very satisfying tome.”