looked at Maggie. “Mrs. Herman is Cody’s former nanny. Her leaving has been hard on him. I’m sorry you had to see that.”
“Don’t be,” Maggie said, and meant it. “He is attached to Mrs. Herman. It’s a loss he has to process. I understand. It’ll take some time, but we’ll be okay.”
Maggie held her breath while Josh gave her a thoughtful look. “Let’s have a seat and go over what exactly you’ll be doing.”
Maggie’s heart soared. “Does this mean I officially have the job?”
“Yes.”
Even with the reluctance in his voice, relief flooded her. Maybe her luck had finally turned, after all.
* * *
Too young.
Later that evening, Josh’s thought upon seeing Maggie Thelan for the first time kept playing through his head. And too gorgeous, with that long dark hair and those blue, blue eyes rimmed with dark lashes. Similar to Lucy’s, really, but hers had been a paler blue. He pulled his thoughts back to the problem at hand.
His mother was playing matchmaker.
He groaned and clicked the TV remote, not seeing the images on the screen. He’d specifically requested an older woman so there’d be no chance of anyone thinking there was anything remotely marriageable about him. That possibility died with Lucy, as it should have.
But Mom clearly had other plans. She’d told him over and over to move on. To let Lucy go. He’d listened politely, but he knew it didn’t matter. He’d made a promise to her, intended to keep it. He’d managed it for nearly four years.
But then Maggie stumbled into his life and now things were not quite so cut and dried. She made something he’d buried long ago want to sit up and take notice.
Josh groaned again and scrubbed his hand over his eyes.
Hell. She’d be the nanny. Meaning she’d be living here, under his roof, right down the hall from his bedroom.
Josh shifted on the bed. Uh-uh. No way could his thoughts take that course. No.
Maybe he could tell her he’d changed his mind, they didn’t need her and he’d go find a nanny on his own.
A nice, grandmotherly type. Someone who wouldn’t remind him he couldn’t get involved with another woman.
“Daddy?” Cody’s voice sliced across his thoughts.
“Cody. I thought you were sleeping.” Josh hit the mute button on the TV. He patted the bed beside him. “You okay?”
Cody nodded as he crawled up next to Josh. “Yeah. Is Miz Thelan gonna be my new nanny?” His voice dropped off.
“Mrs. Herman isn’t coming back,” Josh said gently. “You know that, Code. We need someone to help us out around here. Ms. Thelan seems really nice. I think she’ll be a good nanny.”
So much for not hiring her.
Cody bit his lower lip. “But—don’t—if I don’t get a nanny won’t Miz Herman hafta come back?” The words tumbled out in a rush.
“No. Oh, Cody, is that what you thought?” Josh’s heart broke and he reached over to hug his son to his side, felt the little body nestle into his own.
Cody shrugged his small shoulders, then nodded.
Josh spoke gently, knowing how hard this had been for his son. “Cody, she loves you, but she had to go.”
“Like Mama,” Cody said matter-of-factly, and pain seared through Josh, cutting off his air for a heartbeat. Like Mama.
“Mama can’t come back. But she loved you, too, Cody.” His voice grated in his throat. Lucy had adored Cody, doted on him, loved him with every last fiber of her being. This Josh knew without a doubt. Guilt crushed him every time he thought of it. He was the reason his son didn’t have a mother anymore.
“Miz Thelan is pretty,” Cody said. Josh said nothing, stymied by the realization that he couldn’t deny he agreed, or what it meant. “Will she live here? With you an’ me, Daddy?”
“Yeah,” Josh said and wondered again if having Maggie under his roof was a good plan.
“Then I guess it’s okay to try her, Daddy.” Cody’s small face was serious. Josh hid a smile.
“Then we will. I think she’ll be just fine.”
“Is she gonna cook for us?”
Josh shrugged. “She said she could but we’ll see.”
They looked at each other for a moment, and Josh knew they were both thinking of Mrs. Herman’s practical casseroles.
Years of casseroles.
“No, um, cassy-oles?” Cody ventured and Josh laughed.
“She doesn’t look like the casserole type but we’ll ask her tomorrow when she gets here just to be sure. Okay? Now let’s get you back to bed.”
“Okay.” Cody slid off Josh’s bed. Josh followed him across the hall and tucked Cody back in. He ran a hand over the boy’s curls and Cody gave him a sleepy smile.
“G’night, Daddy.”
“’Night, Code.” Josh lingered for a moment, enjoying the little rustles Cody made as he settled. Then he returned to his room, flopped on the bed and stared at the ceiling.
Sleep wouldn’t come easy for him tonight.
* * *
Maggie pulled in the driveway of the big blue house, her car packed to the gills. Everything else had gone into storage when she sublet her apartment. That had been a bit of a risk. If this nanny position had fallen through, she’d have been up you-know-what creek without a paddle.
At least it would be familiar territory.
She got out of the car and hesitated in the driveway. Hired or not, it didn’t seem right to just walk in the house. Ellen burst out the front door.
“Maggie! Oh, my goodness, let me help. Josh, come on,” she yelled over her shoulder. “Maggie’s here.” She hurried across the lawn and gave Maggie a quick hug. “Let Josh and me help you. Is this all you brought?” she asked as she opened a rear door.
“All?” Maggie laughed. The car practically groaned under the weight of her “necessities.” The front door banged shut before she could say anything else and she turned to see Josh step out on the porch. His flannel shirt looked soft and worn with age, and his jeans held the same patina. His whiskey gaze caught hers and her traitorous pulse tripped. He gave her a half smile, strode down the steps.
“Good morning, Ms. Thelan,” he said, his deep voice resonating in the very core of her.
“It’s Maggie,” she said, and mentally winced at the husky element in her voice.
“Maggie, then,” he said and looked at her with... Was that regret?
“Josh! This box has books. Can you get it?” Ellen’s voice reached them, and he turned toward his mother.
“Sure, Mom,” he said. Maggie went around to the other side of the car as her insides twisted. Was Josh having second thoughts about hiring her? He’d been ambivalent, she knew, but she’d hoped a few days of space would have erased his doubts.
An hour later, she decided she’d imagined the whole thing. Josh was polite, and said no more than necessary, but she didn’t catch any more weird vibes from him. Ellen made up for it with chatter and Maggie was grateful for her warmth. Cody hovered around the edges of the activity, helping sometimes without being asked, but mostly dogging his father’s shadow. Her heart ached for the boy.
She hoped by Monday he’d have accepted her enough that they could spend the day together comfortably.