quickly shook her head before her mother’s assumption got out of hand. “No. I’m not pregnant. Scott and I never... well, I guess deep down, something kept telling me not to sleep with him. But as for a baby, I would love to have a child. Just not by Scott. I’d at least want to respect the father.”
Chloe frowned with bewilderment. “If you’re not pregnant, then what—”
“I’m talking about me being so...so melancholy. I’m not grieving over my ended relationship with Scott. That’s all over and done with. I’m just overworked.”
The tense expression on Chloe’s face eased. “Of course you are, honey. That’s why you’re here on vacation. So you can rest and recuperate. And you will. You’ve only just gotten here. Give yourself time.”
Anna sighed. “I’m not so sure I want to go back, Mother. I’m not so sure I want to keep playing the piano professionally.”
Several moments passed in silence. Then, just as Anna was expecting her mother to burst out with shocked dismay, Chloe gentle smiled.
“Why haven’t you said anything about this before?”
“Because I didn’t want to upset you and Dad. I knew you would think I was losing my mind if I did.”
Chloe shook her head. “Anna, you must live your own life as you want to live it. Not as you think we want you to.”
Of course Anna should have expected her mother would say those words. And so would her father. They would hide their disappointment just to make their daughter happy.
“You would say that,” Anna mumbled.
“Since when have I or your father ever lied to you?”
Anna shook her head. “Not any time that I can ever remember. But I know how much you’ve always wanted my career to go forward.”
“And it has,” Chloe agreed. “You’ve been making a great salary, you’ve traveled all over the world and seen all sorts of sights. But if your job is making you unhappy...then you need to stop and ask yourself what it is you really want.”
Anna went over to her mother’s chair, knelt down at the arm and pressed her hand over her mother’s. “I have been, Mother. And I think I fell in with Scott’s plans to get married not so much because I loved him or even needed him, but because I wanted children and a home and I thought he could give those things to me.”
Chloe’s gentle smile was understanding. “And you want those things more than you want to travel and play the piano.”
Anna’s head bobbed up and down. “Does that sound crazy?”
Chloe laughed softly, then reached over and patted her daughter’s cheek. “If it does then I’ve been crazy for the past twenty-five years.”
She hadn’t really meant to blurt all of this out to her mother this evening, but she felt a bit better for it.
Rising to her feet, Anna said, “Well, it does sound crazy, actually. A woman needs a man to have a home and children. And since I don’t want a man in my life, I’ve got to turn my attention to other things.”
“What other things?”
Anna’s slender shoulders lifted then fell. “I don’t know. Maybe I should just throw myself back into the music and forget about the children and the white picket fence. Maybe after six weeks of rest I’ll be itching to perform again.” A wan smile tilted her lips. “In the meantime, I’m simply going to enjoy being home. It was such a pleasure to ride Ginger this afternoon. Just being with the horses again is therapeutic for me.”
“I’m glad.”
Her lips suddenly thinned to a smirk. “By the way, I met your new foreman earlier before I went out riding. I didn’t realize Lester had left.”
Chloe nodded. “Lester had reached retirement age and he and his wife wanted to do some traveling.”
Lester had been on the Bar M for twenty years. He was a bowlegged, raw-boned, pipe smoker who’d rarely shown the top of his bald head to anyone. He’d been more or less like a grandpa to Anna and Adam and their younger sister, Ivy. Miguel Chavez was nothing like Lester.
“Where did you find Mr. Chavez?”
“Your uncle Roy knew him. Miguel lived in Carrizozo for several years. Before that, Albuquerque, I think. What did you think of him?”
Anna had thought far too many things. In fact, she was still wondering why that idiotic thought about his mouth had ever entered her head.
“Well, I’m sure he’s a strong, capable man or you wouldn’t have him here.”
A knowing little smile on her face, Chloe said, “Miguel is a good man, but he doesn’t profess to know all that much about racehorses. He sees to the cattle end of things and makes sure the cowhands do all the rough stable work for me.”
Anna’s brows lifted. Miguel Chavez possessed more than a striking appearance. Self-confidence oozed from every pore on the man. “He doesn’t know about horses? I don’t believe that for a minute.”
Chloe rose from the chaise lounge and stretched. “Well, of course he knows about horses. He rides like a man who was born in the saddle. But I’m talking about the ins and outs of racing.”
Anna glanced at her as another question struck her. “Is he...Miguel living in the old foreman’s house?”
The place she referred to was a midsize log structure built almost a mile south of the ranch house and halfway up the mountain. Anna had always been fond of the homestead. It was quiet and secluded and had a spectacular view of Sierra Blanca to the west.
Chloe nodded, then with an assessing gleam in her eye, added, “And he’s single. I think he was married years ago. I don’t know what happened. Apparently some woman dealt him some misery. I suppose, like you, he’s sworn off the opposite sex. Since he’s been here I haven’t seen him look sideways at one, much less have one to his house as a date.”
For some reason, Anna didn’t feel comfortable talking about Miguel Chavez’s personal life. He’d seemed a private person, one who kept his deeper thoughts to himself. She respected that, and anyway, it was no concern of hers whether the man was single or married or a masochist. She had her own problems to deal with.
“I’m sure he has his reasons,” Anna said, though she couldn’t help wondering if some woman had left him emotionally bruised and beaten. She sincerely doubted it. Miguel Chavez seemed too tough to have ever suffered a broken heart.
“Yes, I’m sure he’s had his reasons,” her mother said with a sigh. “But it seems such a shame. No one should be that alone.”
Her mother spoke with the same sort of fretfulness she might have used if she were talking about Adam, but that didn’t surprise Anna. Chloe wanted everyone she knew to be as happy as her. And in her mother’s eyes, love and happiness were synonymous.
“Maybe Miguel Chavez simply prefers his own company,” Anna said, then, looping her arm around her mother’s, she urged the other woman toward the house. “Let’s go in. The breeze is getting downright cold.”
“Wait a minute, darling, the coffeepot.” She walked over to a small table and picked up the insulated container, then rejoined her daughter. “Now back to Miguel—he doesn’t know what he prefers. He’s lived alone for so long, he’s forgotten what female companionship is all about.”
Chloe’s candor brought a pink flush to Anna’s cheeks. “Mother, I imagine Miguel Chavez has already forgotten more about women than the average man would know in a lifetime.”
Suddenly Chloe began to laugh, and Anna glanced at her sharply as the two of them entered the back door of the kitchen.
“You find that funny?”
Chloe’s