this was an easy decision for me to make?” she asked. “Well, it wasn’t. I agonized over it. I’m twenty-nine years old, Lucas, and haven’t had a relationship with a man in years. This may be the only baby I ever have, and it’s not even mine. Hear that? It’s not a baby I can hope that you’ll share with me.”
Nothing she said soothed him. In fact, it had the opposite effect. His jaw muscles jerked. And it seemed as if Lucas were about to let go of the choke hold he had on his anger and other emotions.
“And at no point during this monumental decision-making process did it occur to you to ask me if I wanted you for a surrogate?” he stormed. “No. That would have too reasonable. Something a sane, normal person would have done. And you know what I would have said if you’d asked, Kylie? I would have told you that there’s no way in hell I want you to be the mother of my child.”
Oh, that stung.
Mercy.
And here she thought she was somewhat immune to anything Lucas could say to her. She was obviously wrong.
“I made a promise to Marissa,” Kylie reminded him. Because that was the true bottom line of why she’d made her decision. Yes, her guilt had contributed to it. So had her need to somehow pay for her mistake. But if Marissa hadn’t asked, Kylie wouldn’t have become Lucas’s surrogate. “And I always keep my promises.”
“Oh, that’s a good one.” He took several steps toward her and got right in her face. “What about the promise to keep the citizens of Fall Creek safe? What about your sworn oath to follow regs? Regs you ignored when you went after those two men who robbed the convenience store? Was it worth it, Kylie? Was Marissa’s and my baby’s lives worth catching two scumbags who’d stolen a hundred and twenty-three dollars?”
Kylie had no answer for that, and she’d tried for nearly three years to find one. She’d made a fatal mistake that day. Not waiting for backup. Proceeding on foot after two armed suspects. Though waiting for backup might not have changed the outcome, it was a mistake she’d tried to live with.
So far, she hadn’t been successful.
She wasn’t holding out hope that she would succeed any time soon. Because of Marissa’s death, she turned in her badge. Resigned. She’d quit a job she loved. But Kylie was under no illusions that her resignation would atone for what she’d done.
“Look, I know this isn’t my business,” she heard Finn say. He had come back into the room, stepping between Lucas and her. “But you’re both my friends, and I won’t stand here and let you two rip each other apart. Besides, I’d like to get some sleep. My advice is that both of you should quit talking and instead start trying to figure out what you’re going to do. Not about the baby,” he quickly added. “Leave that for a day when tempers have settled a bit. I’m concerned about a more immediate problem here.”
Kylie waited until Lucas turned his attention from her and aimed it at Finn before she followed suit. She also tried to let what Finn had said sink in. Yes. They did have a more immediate problem than her secret surrogacy.
Finn’s hands went to his hips. “Let me insult your intelligence and summarize the situation, Lucas. Someone tried to kidnap Kylie tonight. She’s possibly still in danger. And that baby she’s carrying is yours. My advice—bury the hatchet. Not in her back, either. Bury it and get on with what you know you have to do.”
Kylie figured it was a good time for her to sit there and shut up. Lucas must have decided the same thing because the conversation ground to a halt. Seconds ticked by, practically turning into minutes, before Finn cursed.
“All right. Be that way. Since it obviously isn’t safe or prudent for Kylie to go home, and since I doubt she wants to sleep in the jail or on that examining table, you should take her to your ranch, Lucas.”
“No!” Kylie and Lucas said in unison.
Finn shrugged and directed his attention to Lucas. “Well, I can’t bring Kylie with me to my house. I can’t defend her against kidnappers and other assorted felons. I don’t even own a gun. And besides, protecting her is your job.”
When Lucas didn’t respond other than with a lethal glare, Finn huffed. “Since you’re a good sheriff, and since I know you’re not an ass, I’m trying hard to figure out why you’re hesitating. Is it public opinion? Gossip, maybe?” He stopped, as if considering that. “Please don’t tell me you’re concerned how your former sister-in-law would feel about Kylie staying at the ranch.”
Now, it was Lucas’s turn to huff. “Cordelia doesn’t make decisions for me.”
“That’s never stopped her from trying,” Finn mumbled. He grabbed Lucas’s hand and plopped it against Kylie’s stomach. “But whatever’s causing you to hesitate, forget it. Do what you’ve sworn to do. Protect her. Protect your baby.”
Lucas’s hand was stiff. Even through the cotton scrubs, she could feel the calluses he’d earned the hard way—by working on his ranch. His touch stayed rigid, defensive. He closed his eyes for a moment. Swallowed hard.
Then, something happened.
His touch suddenly wasn’t so hard. Wasn’t so defensive.
Finn backed away. Lucas’s hand stayed put. And his fingers moved gently over her stomach. Not far. Mere fractions of an inch. He didn’t make a sound. Didn’t say word.
But their gazes met.
And in that gaze, Kylie saw what was going on. Pain, yes. That was a given. But there was more. That gentleness wasn’t about the pain, but rather about the life growing inside her.
“My baby,” he said under his breath. “Why?” Not an accusation this time, but a plea.
She waited a moment, to clear that sudden lump in her throat. While she was at it, she prayed she wouldn’t disgrace herself again by crying. “I wanted to try to give you back what I took from you.”
He waited a moment, as well. Staring at her. Really staring. He pulled his hand away, and she immediately felt the loss of his body heat. Something stirred deep down within her. An ache. A longing. A…need.
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