so that she could at last free herself from the guilts of the past, because until she did they would continue to poison the present and the future.
CHAPTER TWO
SELINA’S first week in Gerald Harvey’s employ passed quickly. During their interview she had been too wrought up and tense to do much more than concentrate on his questions, but now that she was settling down into the day-to-day routine she found herself watching him; wondering what he would say if he knew the truth; how he would react. She had promised herself long ago that she would never fall into the trap of wanting an emotional commitment from the man who had fathered her and all through her growing up, although she had followed his career, she had never ever allowed herself to think of him as her father—to her he had simply been her mother’s lover; and then her opponent in a battle in which she herself had been used as no more than another weapon. She had never anticipated feeling any emotional response to him; after all why should she; and yet, illogically, it was there; it was disconcerting to discover how easily they meshed and at the end of the first week he turned to her and said warmly.
‘Selina, I’m going to bless the day I hired you. We seem to have achieved a working rapport in a remarkable short space of time. Do you think you’ll be happy with us?’
Happy? Selina tried to analyse the word. What was happiness? She had reached a goal and that in itself brought with it its own sense of achievement, but happy…
‘I’m sure I shall be,’ she told him equably, lowering her head so that he couldn’t see her face. This man was her father; they were united by ties of blood and heritage and yet…
‘Is something bothering you?’
He asked the question quietly, coming to stand immediately behind her, one hand on her arm. There was nothing sexual in his touch; it was merely concern, and Selina was shaken to discover that tears were pricking her eyes.
A sound outside her vision broke the silence between them. Someone had opened the door, and Selina felt her nerves curl in bitter tension as she heard her father say genially, ‘Piers, it’s good to have you back. Did all go well?’
It had been a relief to Selina to discover that Piers Gresham was away for several days. He had gone to stay with his godfather, Sue, Gerald’s secretary, had told her. But now he was back.
‘Fine.’
Selina could feel the intensity of his gaze concentrated on her, forcing her to lift her head. Something in her eyes made his narrow and sharpen, moving from her face to her father’s and then back to hers again, his mouth grim. Sue ran through to advise her father that she had a call waiting on the line for him and as both she and Piers moved away out of earshot Selina was stunned to hear him say warningly.
‘I don’t know what game you’re playing with my uncle but it better not be the one I think it is. He is a married man you know, or is that what you prefer? If so, you won’t find him any pushover, he was nearly caught that way once before.’
Sick to her stomach Selina stumbled past him, making for the sanctuary of the Ladies’ cloakroom. Once inside she was furious with herself for the nausea that choked her throat. What was wrong with her? She had only herself to blame for Piers’ hostility. But that was no reason for him to assume that simply because his uncle was touching her arm that she had deliberately… Her stomach lurched. The man was her father for God’s sake. But he did not know that and neither did Piers Gresham.
It was a good fifteen minutes before she felt in control enough to leave the Ladies. On her way back to her office she passed Sue. The other girl gave her a curious glance. Sue had a boyfriend with whom she lived and to whom she was devoted. That did not stop her from flirting with every male who crossed her path, though. However, she was a good-natured girl, as warm and open as she herself was silent and reserved Selina acknowledged, returning her smile.
‘You okay?’
‘Fine. Is Sir Gerald off the phone?’
When Sue nodded Selina opened the door and walked into her father’s room, but it was Piers who stood behind the desk not her father. She came to a full stop, aware that the tiny hairs at the back of her neck were raised in primaeval awareness.
‘Excuse me.’ Her voice sounded artificially polite. ‘I was looking for Sir Gerald.’
‘He’s just popped out. Don’t run away, I’d like to talk to you.’ As he spoke he put down the brief he had been reading and came towards her. A panicky desire to turn and flee almost overwhelmed her, but Selina withstood it. She was going to have to accustom herself to this man’s presence; after all they would be working in the same set of chambers; they were bound to meet occasionally and the sooner she learned not to react so intensely to him the better it would be.
‘What made you apply for this post?’
His question caught her off-guard. For a moment she said nothing and then stammered. ‘I…I…I was ready for a change,’ she managed at last.
‘Is that so? You know you’re remarkably well qualified for a young lady who is content to be merely a PA. Have you never thought of taking on something more challenging? You have an excellent degree.’
‘I have my ambitions yes.’ Selina tried to mimic his cool self-possession.
‘And what are they, I wonder?’ He was coming towards her now, stalking her almost, she thought angrily. What was he hoping to achieve? ‘My uncle thinks very highly of you. In fact I’d say he’s taken to you in a remarkably short space of time. Most unusual. He’s normally a very cautious man where attractive young women are concerned.’
‘Why?’ Selina asked flippantly. ‘Does he have a jealous wife?’
Just for a second she was alarmed by the gleam in the midnight blue eyes, but then it was gone, his expression flat and unreadable.
‘Not very clever, Miss Thorn,’ he said at last. ‘If you’re only half as clever as I think you are you must have read all there is to read on my uncle; done all your background research before you applied for this job. You know very well why he would want to avoid any sort of entanglement outside his marriage don’t you?’
Selina felt as though the floor had suddenly dropped away beneath her, leaving her on thin ice.
‘I know that many years ago your uncle was involved with another woman,’ she agreed coolly, turning aside with what she hoped was a calm disdain as she added, ‘but then so have many other prominent men.’
‘Indeed they have, but very few have attracted the subsequent blaze of publicity and notoriety suffered by my uncle. I was eight years old at the time. My aunt almost suffered a nervous breakdown.’
‘I’m sure it must have been an extremely traumatic time for you all.’ Selina was distant, her voice clipped. Don’t tell me any more, it warned him, I don’t want to hear, but her warning signals were ignored.
‘My uncle has three daughters; the eldest one was expecting her first child at that time; she lost it; the second ran away from school because she could not endure the torment inflicted on her by her school-mates. You’re looking quite pale, Miss Thorn. Do you find what I’m relating to you upsetting?’
‘It was all a long time ago,’ she managed to say, hating him now with an intensity that made her long to physically assault him. How dared he tell her all this…. Didn’t he think that she had suffered…that she… She pulled herself together before she lost control completely.
‘I can assure you that I have no desire to break up your uncle’s marriage,’ she told him crisply. That much at least was true.
‘Maybe not,’ he agreed slowly, ‘but you have some ulterior means for being here. I can sense it. Body signals are a very strange thing, Miss Thorn,’ he added watching her. ‘They give away to others so much more than we want them to see. Why do you dislike me so much?’
‘How could I dislike you? I barely know you.’ Selina