salt their steak at the end of the cooking process believing it preserves the juices of the meat, I’m not sure it makes that much difference, but it’s up to you). Place the steaks on the grill pan and press down hard. Let them cook for 2 minutes without moving them, this will ensure you achieve that lovely chargrilled, slightly crunchy exterior. Turn over after the 2 minutes are up, preferably using tongs (if you stab your meat with a fork you will sacrifice your juices), once again press down and cook for a further 2 minutes. This will give you a medium-rare steak, though it’s impossible to pinpoint the exact timing due to thickness of the cut and the hanging time of the meat, etc, the only real way to know is to cut into it a little towards the middle of steak. If you like your steak a little more well done, keep it in the pan, turning it every minute or so. Once cooked, turn off the heat and allow the steaks to rest for a couple of minutes. Serve with the pommes frites and Béarnaise sauce and some watercress dressed with the pan juices. Sit back, enjoy and watch him drool.
Caffé Affogato
Translated literally, this means ‘drowned coffee’ and really could not be easier to make. Make some strong filter or espresso coffee, if you’re lucky enough to own an espresso-making machine pour enough for 2 small cups into a jug and add 2 tsps of sugar. Place a generous dollop of ice-cream into each of 2 dessert glasses, pour over some of your favourite liqueur or, failing that, whatever you have handy – brandy, Amaretto, Cointreau all make fine additions. Top with the coffee and serve with some fancy little biscuits bought especially for the occasion.
Quite apart from being delicious, this clever little pudding gets the whole dessert, coffee and brandy thing out of the way in one hit.
The Food of Love
He eats nothing but doves, love, and that breeds hot blood, and hot blood begets hot thoughts, and hot thoughts beget hot deeds, and hot deeds is love.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
It’s all about personal experience and memory. For example, if you had your first sexual encounter having just had baked beans on toast for dinner then that humble repast will be forever imprinted in your memory as a sexual trigger, which is exactly what an aphrodisiac is all about.
The mind boggles!
There are also those generic aphrodisiacs that seem to work for everyone, goodness knows why. For example, we have already ascertained that in the case of oysters they are loaded with zinc, which is known to increase energy and assist fertility, but is it really that scientific or could it be purely psychological, caused by our wicked imaginations playing tricks on us?
I have put together a collection of some pretty powerful aphrodisiacs for your delight and delectation. Experiment, and see what works for you.
N.B. The best aphrodisiac of all is love. Passion, where love is also present, knows no bounds and has no limits.
Divine Aphrodite, much celebrated lover of laughter, companion of Bacchus, whose bliss is abundant, patroness of feasts which last for nights.
HOMER, THE ILIAD
Now, here is an interesting thing. A recent sex study in America involving a group of men tested penile blood flow in response to various aromas. Apparently, the more erotic they found the smell, the greater the reaction. With me so far? The stuff they tested included, amongst other things, expensive perfumes, female pheromones, suntan lotion, various flowers and freshly ground coffee. They found out that the biggest turn on, the one that set the blood rushing, was none other than the spice cinnamon (now known as Love Dust), which by pure coincidence (or is it?) was the signature spice of the greatest female seductress of all time, Aphrodite, goddess of love.
Apparently, when she needed a little assistance with her seduction technique (despite her well-documented and considerable charms), she simply sprinkled a little cinnamon dust onto her victim’s dinner and the poor man was toast. Putty in her hands. It has to be worth a try!
Here are a few more:
It is mooted that caviar works very well, it’s the zinc thing again, though I personally believe it’s because it is so damn expensive you feel spoilt and special, ergo, horny, just being around the stuff. Also, any kind of shellfish: prawns, lobster, mussels, scallops – all that prising, peeling, licking and sucking does it for me every time.
With regards fruit, I love grapes because you get to drape a bunch of them over your mouth and devour them in the manner of a Roman orgy; strawberries, because they fit so nicely into a champagne glass and are the perfect fruit to dip in melted chocolate and feed to your lover; figs, because, well, I won’t go into detail, suffice to say they bear a startling resemblance to female genitalia when cut in half; but the high priestess of aphrodisiac fruits, as quoted in the Kama Sutra, is the pomegranate. It was also the sacred fruit of Aphrodite, and we know what a little minx she was! For my money, if sex were a fruit it would be a mango: the taste, texture and perfume drive this woman to distraction.
Asparagus is also extremely effective. Again, I think it’s the licking and sucking quota that makes it so sexy, rather than the actual taste. Of course, we cannot forget the truffle, the smell of which drives men and women wild; that musky aroma is capable of arousing even the most reticent lover.
N.B. If you are seeking a guaranteed successful seduction I will avail you of my secret weapon, a menu so packed with aphrodisiacs it should carry a health warning.
Culinary Viagra
Start with some stems of lightly steamed asparagus served with hollandaise for dipping, follow this with a steaming bowl of tagliatelle dressed with nothing but a large knob of butter, a dusting of Parmesan and finished off with shavings of fresh white truffle. Dessert is slices of mango and pomegranate seeds sprinkled with cinnamon. You should, of course, serve nothing but champagne throughout the whole meal.
Use this menu wisely and sparingly, as it will provoke nothing short of a sexual frenzy.
Herbs and spices are jammed with aphrodisiacal powers. Cinnamon, as we have discussed, is top of the list, also ginger for male fertility and nutmeg for staying power. Ginseng can apparently fuel our sexuality in the manner of rabid rabbits, and saffron, here’s one for the girls, assists in arousal as it ensures our erogenous zones are ultra sensitive.
I find one of the most effective, sure-fire aphrodisiacs is champagne. It gets you squiffy quite fast and one tends to lose all one’s inhibitions, along with one’s knickers. Clearly all alcohol can be used to the same effect, but a pint of bitter does not quite have the same ring to it nor, I imagine, the same results.
My family has an old recipe that is reserved expressly for honeymooners. As newlyweds my parents spent a few days of their honeymoon on my grandfather’s farm near Parma. While they were there my great-grandmother, Nonna Marianna – in a bid to assist the baby-making process – would knock up her version of an aphrodisiac every morning and deliver it to the happy couple at breakfast time, placing it outside their door with a sharp rap of her knuckles to alert them to its presence.
The recipe was passed down to her from her great-grandmother and a few years ago when my sister and brother-in-law were passing a few days of their honeymoon at the farm before their grand tour of Italy, it was my mother who was at hand to prepare for them this very special family tradition.
Nonna Marianna had 12 kids and swore that each one was due to this recipe.