way of thinking. Then, when I found out that you’d actually put your house on the market, I just lost it.’
‘I’m sorry. Perhaps I should have told you earlier, but I thought it was for the best.’ Jack now realised he should have known the news would reach Molly.
‘I don’t want you to leave, Jack. I love you. I want us to get back together. I want you to forget about taking up the new job—’
Jack interrupted, ‘I’m sorry, Moll. I won’t do that. I’ve signed the contract and even now they’re making a short-list to fill my old position. It’s all settled, and I have to say, I feel lighter of heart than I’ve felt for a very long time. I really believe the recent series of events – you badgering me to see someone about my nightmares, then this vacancy coming up in Lytham – it all seems to fit.’
‘You could still say no,’ Molly persisted. ‘You just said, they haven’t got anyone to replace you yet, so you could tell them you’ve changed your mind . . . that you’re staying put. It’s not too late. Look, Jack, I’ve been thinking. Maybe the psychiatrist you saw was not the right one for you. So, go to someone who knows what they’re talking about, and in time, you’re sure to find the answer you’re looking for.’
Jack was adamant. ‘I do love you,’ he told her, ‘but to my mind, love is sharing. It’s helping each other. It’s a two-way thing.’
‘But that’s exactly what I’m saying!’ She grew excited. ‘I understand you. I understand about the nightmares. That’s why I made you go and see someone, because I wanted them to end. I wanted to help you. But now everything’s got out of hand. You listened to some idiot who didn’t know what he was talking about. Then you get it into your head to go back, to where you think it all began. I so want it to be like it was before. I don’t want to be on my own, Jack. You’re leaving, without a thought for me. You’re uprooting your whole life, and I know you’re bound to regret it.’
For what seemed an age, Jack let her words soak in, and all he could hear was ‘I’ this and ‘I’ that. ‘I want it to be like it was before . . . I made you go and see someone . . . I don’t want to be on my own.’
All he could hear was what Molly wanted. Not for one minute did she ever stop to consider what he wanted. What he desperately needed.
‘I can’t stay,’ he told her quietly. ‘It can’t be like it was before.’
When she opened her mouth to speak, he gently shushed her. ‘Molly, I know you understand about the nightmares, and I know you badgered me into seeing someone about them, and for that I am truly thankful.’
‘But?’ The harsh question was also an accusation. ‘Go on – tell me! Why can’t you stay? Why can’t it be like it was before?’
Jack knew then, that it really was over between them. ‘I have told you,’ he reminded her, ‘many times. Over and over. But it seems not to have sunk in, so I’ll tell you again. I cannot live with these nightmares for the rest of my life, and believe it or not, when it was suggested that they might actually be a memory, rather than my imagination, I have to tell you, Molly, something inside me knew that it was the truth. That the nightmares really do stem from something that actually happened.’
‘NO!’ She had never accepted the theory and she didn’t accept it now. ‘That can’t be! The things you see must be awful beyond words. You wake up covered in sweat and terror. You make strange noises, like some wild animal . . . and when you finally come out of it, you’re gabbling about the darkness, the full moon, and eyes staring at you . . . and unspeakable things that frighten me.’
Getting out of her chair, she looked at him as though seeing a stranger. This time she spoke softly, as though not wanting others to overhear. ‘You know what, Jack? I’ve always wondered, but now I know for certain. You’re losing your mind! There’s no other explanation.’
Jack was deeply shocked. ‘I think you’d better leave.’ Her accusations, her changed attitude, had unnerved him.
She went on, ‘You really are out of your mind, I can see that now. So go ahead, do what you like. I want no part of it.’
Heading for the door, she turned, her face set like stone. ‘Goodbye, Jack. Go and chase your ghosts. I really don’t care what you do any more.’ But what she said and what she thought were two different things.
Jack watched her leave, stunned by her cruel words. ‘So I’m a crazy man, eh?’ The awful thing was, he could almost believe her, but lately he had learned how vicious she could be when things did not go her way.
‘That was a spiteful thing for her to say.’ He thought about it for a moment, and was tempted to admit, she might be right.
That was why he had to go on this journey – to prove that he was as sane as anyone else.
Outside in Reception, they were still feeling shaken by Molly’s stormy entrance. Jan was talking with Charlie, one of the sales team. ‘What was she thinking,’ Charlie said, ‘coming in here and causing such a scene?’
‘She’s crazy!’ Jan answered. ‘I wouldn’t mind smacking her one. Calling me his bitch!’ She let her mind linger on that for a while, and a slow smile lifted her face. ‘Come to think of it, I wouldn’t mind being his bitch!’
The last two people to leave the building were Jan and Jack.
‘I’m sorry about all that,’ said Jack, referring to the nasty comment Molly had made. ‘She hasn’t always been so spiteful. It’s my fault she’s in such a rage.’
‘That’s not true!’ Jan had a habit of speaking her mind. ‘You can’t blame yourself for her bad temper. We can all throw a tantrum when things don’t go our way, but she was totally out of order. She just marched in and went straight for you. Thank God the boss wasn’t here.
She didn’t give a toss about getting you into trouble, did she? She obviously meant to have a row, and there was no stopping her.’
‘She was right, though. It must have hurt, me taking my house sale to a rival company. But I thought it would be less hurtful to her.’
‘Well, there you are, then So, like I said, her behaving like that was out of order.’ Jan picked up her keys and shoulder-bag. ‘Come on, let’s get out of here. Look, if you don’t mind me saying, your ex-girlfriend is nothing but a spoiled brat. Sweet and sugary when things are going right for her, then a cat in hell when she can’t have her own way. For what it’s worth, I think she showed you her true character today.’ She tutted loudly, ‘I bet even now, you still feel sorry for her?’
‘I do a bit, yes.’
Jan chuckled. ‘She was right about one thing.’
‘What’s that?’
‘She wasn’t far wrong when she called me a bitch.’
‘Why do you say that?’
‘Because she’s a woman, and she knows deep down that I fancy you. If I thought I had a chance with you, it would be claws drawn at noon and no mercy.’
Jack laughed, ‘You’re a feisty sort, I’ll give you that.’
‘Right, I’m off now,’ said Jan. ‘Mind how you go, eh?’
On the drive home, Jack couldn’t get Molly out of his mind. He kept thinking of the good times, and the guilt was like a clenched fist in his chest. Did he still want her? Or was he well rid of her?
There was a time, not very long ago, when she was his saviour. She had been there for him in his darkest hours. She had comforted him when he was low, and listened to him when he needed to talk things through. They were friends and lovers, and he