had been made and now they had to rise to the challenges they now faced.
With this thought, her excitement faded to fear and she gripped Dan’s hand a little tighter. He would be leaving tomorrow and that wasn’t quite the challenge she wanted to face, which was silly really. She and Dan had spent plenty of time apart over the years – months and months away from each other – and their friendship remained strong. A twinge of the hurt she had felt after Jason tried to shadow and dampen her good vibes. It felt different now. Before, she never cared about the tabloids, the girlfriends and the crazy life thrust into the hands of rock stars; now, the ever-present groupies and parties to attend made her insides squirm, but she was determined not to let those negative thoughts weigh her down. Dan had never given her any reason to worry. She was not about to let her mind play tricks on her. Dan was her best friend first and rock star second.
She wasn’t the jealous type, but whatever was causing her unease definitely felt like jealousy. Years of being relaxed with her ex-boyfriend Jason had only meant that he had cheated on her more times than she cared to remember, and she always forgave him; would Dan do the same? The idea of girls throwing themselves at him no longer made her want to roll her eyes and punch Dan in the arm in playful jest, but instead curl up into a ball and cry. But they were together now and Dan knew that. Dan had wanted that too. And he would be back soon. This jealousy was an imposter and had no place in her heart.
‘Should I be Team Cap or Team Iron Man?’ Dan piped up as they turned onto Amanda’s street. They had been walking in a comfortable silence hand in hand, though it hadn’t been all that silent in Amanda’s head.
‘Huh?’ said Amanda, glancing up at Dan. His wavy hair was getting caught in the breeze and falling in his face. She automatically reached up to brush it behind his ear. He caught her hand when she did so and kissed her palm, sending tingles through her entire body. A teasing smirk appeared on Dan’s handsome face. ‘There seems to be a civil war going on in that brain of yours, baby girl.’
Amanda laughed at Dan’s superhero reference. It was difficult to stay worried and anxious when looking into Dan’s rich brown eyes. They did something to her; they melted away her fears and replaced them with a sense of calm and contentment – as though his own demeanour transferred over to her when she needed it most.
‘No, I’m okay. I can’t believe how perfect the café is. I think Grandpa would have loved it. Thank you for staying with me and helping me look for a place,’ Amanda said, brushing the hand that Dan was still holding close to his lips, over Dan’s cheeks. He was supporting a five o’clock shadow; she enjoyed the feel of his stubble against her fingers and the softness of his skin. He looked edible in his chunky black knit cardigan, jeans and white tee. What was it with men and never getting cold? She herself was wearing her oversized pink teddy coat that kept in all the heat, over a grey woolly jumper, with a scarf for good measure.
‘Of course; I could never deny my best girl when she offers me a proposition,’ Dan replied, referring to New Year’s Eve when they were standing on her zia’s balcony overlooking the Amalfi Coast and she had told Dan that she would only be his ‘sexy’ Manchester tour guide if he helped her search for a café. He’d had the same confident glint in his eye back then at the word ‘proposition’ as he did now. ‘Speaking of which, I have a proposition for you,’ he added, letting go of her hands to allow her to rummage through her bag in search of her keys.
‘You do? I have a feeling this proposition is more suited to that dangerously sexy mind of yours,’ Amanda replied as she unlocked her front door. She was no longer battling with her insecurities. Instead she was just focused on Dan, the moment she was in and what he was going to say.
Dan laughed, a low laugh that made her stomach flip over as they entered the house.
‘I was going to suggest we spend the rest of the day baking together, but if you had other things in mind … I was just thinking rum baba.’ He gave her a sly grin, before kissing the base of her neck along her collarbone as she shimmied out of her coat.
Would she ever not be phased by that voice? Amanda playfully pushed him away.
‘Isn’t a proposition supposed to have something in it for both parties? I somehow only see that being beneficial to you and your budding appetite,’ Amanda said teasingly before shoving Dan towards the kitchen.
‘Argh, but you need practice for the café; I saw it on your list, and I am happy to be a guinea pig to make sure everything is up to standard.’ Amanda laughed as she walked behind him, watching him casually brush a hand through his wind-styled hair, which of course looked dreamy on him. Amanda wished the wind had that effect on her own locks. They entered the kitchen and she busied herself in the fridge, keeping Dan in her peripheral vision. It was hard to take her eyes off him. She watched as he took off his cardigan, his white tee taught against his muscles. He’d put on a few extra pounds over Christmas and while staying with her these past three weeks. It suited him – filling out his muscles, making his tall frame broader. She loved wrapping her arms around him.
Speaking of arms, she felt his thick biceps wrap around her shoulders as she collected the ingredients for rum baba. ‘You make a cute guinea pig,’ Amanda said, putting down a pot of cream and reaching up to grab his forearms. She felt safe snuggled up in Dan’s arms.
‘Speaking of lists and recipes, how do you know how much of each ingredient to use, my love? There are no measurements for this recipe,’ Dan whispered into her ear, peering over her shoulder at the tatty piece of paper Amanda had scrawled on. Amanda chuckled and squeezed his forearms. Then she shrugged, a smile spreading across her lips and goosebumps tickling her arms.
‘Erm, I don’t really know. I guess I just know. When I read it, I see Grandpa and I just do what he did.’ Her smile widened as her words made her think of him. Dan squeezed her back. ‘Your mind is my favourite,’ he said, lovingly, making Amanda’s grin reach her ears.
‘Let’s celebrate.’ She reached into the still-open fridge to get the red wine.
‘What? My making a cute guinea pig?’ Dan chuckled, making her shiver. Amanda rolled her eyes and wriggled out of his grasp to retrieve two wine glasses. She handed a glass to Dan – who nodded, watching her adoringly from under his long lashes – and filled up both of their glasses.
‘To Torta per Tutti,’ Dan said, raising his glass to hers. Amanda’s knees immediately buckled, and she went to sit down at the kitchen table, floored that Dan had remembered the name she and her grandpa had come up with for their dream café, years ago. She had only shared this with Dan on one occasion. Hearing him say it out loud made it more real. She wasn’t just doing this for her, she was doing it for Grandpa too. Dan took a step closer to her, so she had to look up and meet his gaze.
‘And to us,’ he added, clinking her glass. They each took a sip, before Dan set about getting the rest of the ingredients for the rum baba out of the fridge. The niggling insecurities she had about her being bad at relationships were the last thing on her mind. She felt every doubt she had ever had about life vanish as she watched him move confidently around her kitchen. If she thought Dan couldn’t get any sexier, she had been very wrong. She stared at him as he put on her apron, pursed his lips and creased his eyebrows in concentration while he read through an Italian recipe, and her heart exploded with happiness.
Their relationship had been going strong for four years. They had faced loss, fame and distance together. Dan and his forever chilled persona had found solutions to problems without drama; he centred Amanda, they knew each other inside out. Nothing could tear them apart.
Vanilla Tea Cupcake
Ingredients:
For the cake:
4oz sugar
4oz butter
All-purpose flour
1 tbsp vanilla – infused with a few drops