Сергей Сергаев

Антология биржевого юмора


Скачать книгу

*

      – Ты как себе акции в портфель выбирал?

      – Ну, как... Методом тыка!

* * *

      Клиент:

      – Странно. А зачем вообще в марже разбираться? Дает брокер кредит, бери и покупай, не дает – не покупай (то же и для продаж). И какой смысл голову напрягать?

* * *

      – Я хотел бы купить книгу...

      – Какого содержания?

      – Да, для больного...

      – Так, может Швагера, Акелиса, Лефевра?

      Конец ознакомительного фрагмента.

      Текст предоставлен ООО «ЛитРес».

      Прочитайте эту книгу целиком, купив полную легальную версию на ЛитРес.

      Безопасно оплатить книгу можно банковской картой Visa, MasterCard, Maestro, со счета мобильного телефона, с платежного терминала, в салоне МТС или Связной, через PayPal, WebMoney, Яндекс.Деньги, QIWI Кошелек, бонусными картами или другим удобным Вам способом.

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