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Pride and Prejudice, a play founded on Jane Austen's novel


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      I haven't seen it, Mr. Collins. I will try to find it for you. [She starts as if to go out of the room.]

      Mrs. Bennet.

      [Wishing to leave them together.] No—no, Lydia will find it. Lydia, my love, go see if you can find the sermons for Mr. Collins.

      [Lydia, with a grimace, rises slowly from her chair.]

      Charlotte Lucas.

      Oh, Mrs. Bennet, I am quite sure that I saw the book in the hall. I will go fetch it.

      Mrs. Bennet.

      [Sharply.] On no account, Charlotte. Lydia will find the book. Lizzy, go and get the mud off your shoes.

      Mr. Collins.

      Oh, I will not trouble any of you ladies.

      Mrs. Bennet.

      It is no trouble, Mr. Collins. Charlotte, if you will come with me, I have a parcel I should like to send your mother.

      Mr. Collins.

      But I assure you, Madam——

      [As they go out, Mrs. Bennet—looking daggers at Charlotte—tries to keep Mr. Collins with Jane.]

      Mrs. Bennet.

      Lydia will find your book, Mr. Collins.

      Mr. Collins.

      On no account, Madam——

      [With awkward gallantry Mr. Collins ushers out the ladies—Lydia rebellious, Charlotte somewhat offended.]

      Elizabeth.

      [With an amused smile, having watched the party vanish, turns to Jane and speaks to her in mock-heroic fashion.] Miss Bennet! Do you realise the honour which is so soon to fall upon our humble home, and our gratefully humble selves?

      Jane.

      [Smiling.] Oh, Lizzy!

      Elizabeth.

      Do you really grasp in its full significance the fact that we may soon be honoured by a visit from Mr. Bingley of Netherfield and Mr. Fitzgerald Darcy, nephew of the Lady Catherine de Bourg?

      Jane.

      Oh, Lizzy, Mr. Collins is a little pompous, but he seems a very well-meaning young man—indeed, sometimes quite agreeable.

      Elizabeth.

      [Looking quizzically, but affectionately, at her sister.] No one can be anything but agreeable in the mind of our dear Jane. This time, however, I quite agree with you, I am as delighted as papa with Mr. Collins. I can see that his mixture of servility and importance promises well.

      Jane.

      And I think Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy promise well. If the half of what our neighbours say is true, Mr. Bingley will give us all sorts of gaieties. [Slyly.] Who knows? We may find him as entertaining as Mr. Wickham.

      Elizabeth.

      As Mr. Wickham? Then, dear Jane, we shall be rich indeed. [Counting on her fingers.] For hospitality—Mr. Bingley; for conversation—Mr. Wickham; for grandeur—Mr. Darcy, and the agreeable Mr. Collins!

      Jane.

      Oh, Lizzy! Can not you let the poor man alone?

      Elizabeth.

      With all my heart. I will gladly let him alone. You shall have him all to yourself. [Mischievously.] If only Mr. Collins knew your good opinion of him! But he is too modest to find it out for himself.

      Jane.

      [Playfully pulling Elizabeth's ear.] You are a tease!

      Harris.

      [Entering.] The two gentlemen from Netherfield have just brought their horses into the paddock, Madam.

      Jane.

      Show them in, Harris, and speak to Mrs. Bennet at once.

      [Harris bows and goes out.]

      Jane.

      They have come soon, Lizzy. Really this is very civil in them.

      Elizabeth.

      Uncommonly civil. Come with me, Jane. I must make myself tidy. Mud and dirty petticoats for Mr. Darcy!—Oh, that would never do.

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