XV.
DOMESTIC MANNERS.
Good manners the expression of benevolence in personal intercourse—Serious defects in manners of the Americans-Causes of abrupt manners to be found in American life—Want of clear discrimination between men—Necessity for distinctions of superiority: and subordination—Importance that young mothers should seriously endeavor to remedy this defect, while educating their children—Democratic principal of equal rights to be applied, not to our own interests but to those of others—The same courtesy to be extended to all classes—Necessary distinctions arising from mutual relations to be observed—The strong to defer to the weak—Precedence yielded by men to women in America—Good manners must be cultivated in early life—Mutual relations of husband and wife—Parents and children—The rearing of children to courtesy—De Tocqueville on American manners.
XVI.
GOOD TEMPER IN THE HOUSEKEEPER.
Easier for a household under the guidance of an equable temper in the mistress—Dissatisfied looks and sharp tones destroy the comfort of system, neatness, and economy—Considerations to aid the housekeeper—Importance and dignity of her duties—Difficulties to be overcome—Good policy to calculate beforehand upon the derangement of well-arranged plans—Object of housekeeping, the comfort and well-being of the family—The end should not be sacrificed to secure the means—Possible to refrain from angry tones—Mild speech most effective—Exemplification—Allowances to be made for servants and children—Power of religion to impart dignity and importance to the ordinary and petty details of domestic life.
XVII.
HABITS OF SYSTEM AND ORDER.
Relative importance and difficulty of the duties a woman is called to perform—Her duties not trivial—A habit of system and order necessary—Right apportionment of time—General principles—Christianity to be the foundation—Intellectual and social interests to be preferred to gratification of taste or appetite—Neglect of health a sin in the sight of God—Regular season of rest appointed by the Creator—Divisions of time—Systematic arrangement of house articles and other conveniences—Regular employment for each member of a family—Children—Family work—Forming habits of system—Early rising a very great aid—Due apportionment of time to the several duties.
XVIII.
GIVING IN CHARITY.
No point of duty more difficult to fix by rule than charity—First consideration—Object for which we are placed in this world—Self- denying Benevolence.—Second consideration—Natural principles not to be exterminated, but regulated and controlled.—Third consideration—Superfluities sometimes proper, and sometimes not—Fourth consideration—No rule of duty right for one and not for all—The opposite of this principle tested—Some use of superfluities necessary—Plan for keeping an account of necessities and superfluities—Untoward results of our actions do not always prove that we deserve blame—General principles to guide in deciding upon objects of charity—Who are our neighbors—The most in need to be first relieved—Not much need of charity for physical wants in this country—Associated charities—Indiscriminate charity—Impropriety of judging the charities of others.
XIX.
ECONOMY OF TIME AND EXPENSES
Economy, value, and right apportionment of time—Laws appointed by God for the Jews—Christianity removes the restrictions laid on the Jews, but demands all our time to be devoted to our own best interests and the good of our fellow-men—Enjoyment connected with every duty—Various modes of economizing time—System and order—Uniting several objects in one employment—Odd intervals of time—Aiding others in economizing time—Economy in expenses—Contradictory notions—General principles in which all agree—Knowledge of income and expenses—Evils of want of system and forethought—Young ladies should early learn to be systematic and economical.
XX.
HEALTH OF MIND.
Intimate connection between the body and mind—Brain excited by improper stimulants taken into the stomach—Mental faculties then affected—Causes of mental disease—Want of oxygenized blood—Fresh air absolutely necessary—Excessive exercise of the intellect or feelings—Such attention to religion as prevents the performance of other duties, wrong—Unusual precocity in children usually the result of a diseased brain—Idiocy often the result, or the precocious child sinks below the average of mankind—This evil yet prevalent in colleges and other seminaries—A medical man necessary in every seminary—Some pupils always needing restraint in regard to study—A third cause of mental disease, the want of appropriate exercise of the various faculties of the mind—Extract from Dr. Combe—Beneficial results of active intellectual employments—Indications of a diseased mind.
XXI.
THE CARE OF INFANTS.
Herbert Spencer on the treatment of offspring—Absurdity of undertaking to rear children without any knowledge of how to do it—Foolish management of parents generally the cause of evils ascribed to Providence—Errors of management during the first two years—Food of child and of mother—Warning as to use of too much medicine—Fresh air—Care of the skin—Dress—Sleep—Bathing—Change of air—Habits—Dangers of the teething period—Constipation—Diarrhea—Teething—How to relieve its dangers—Feverishness—Use of water.
XXII.
THE MANAGEMENT OF YOUNG CHILDREN.
Physical education of children—Animal diet to be avoided for the very young—Result of treatment at Albany Orphan Asylum—Good ventilation of nurseries and schools—Moral training to consist in forming habits of submission, self-denial, and benevolence-General suggestions—Extremes of sternness and laxity to be avoided—Appreciation of childish desires and feelings—Sympathy—Partaking in games and employments—Inculcation of principles preferable to multiplication of commands—Rewards rather than penalties—Severe tones of voice—Children to be kept happy—Sensitive children—Self-denial—Deceit and honesty—Immodesty and delicacy—Dreadful penalties consequent upon youthful impurities—Religious training.
XXIII.
DOMESTIC AMUSEMENTS AND SOCIAL DUTIES.
Children need more amusement than older persons—Its object, to afford rest and recreation to the mind and body—Example of Christ—No amusements to be introduced that will tempt the weak or over-excite the young—Puritan customs—Work followed by play—Dramatic exercises, dancing, and festivity wholesomely enjoyed—The nine o'clock bell—The drama and the dance—Card-playing—Novel-reading—Taste for solid reading—Cultivation of fruits and flowers—Music—Collecting of shells, plants, and minerals—Games—Exercise of mechanical skill for boys—Sewing, cutting, and fitting—General suggestions—Social and domestic duties—Family attachments—Hospitality.
XXIV.
CARE OF THE AGED.
Preservation of the aged, designed to give opportunity for self-denial and loving care—Patience, sympathy, and labor for them to be regarded as privileges in a family—The young should respect and minister unto the aged—Treating them as valued members of the family—Engaging them in domestic Games and sports—Reading aloud-Courteous attention to their opinions—Assistance in retarding decay