Charley” said my friend when they were gone “you’ll give me your company I know, so sit down on that easy chair opposite to me & let’s have a regular two-handed crack.”
I gladly accepted his kind invitation because I knew that if I returned home Mrs Cook would allow me nothing for dinner but a basin-full of some filthy vermined slop. During our meal few words were spoken for Bud hates chatter at feeding time & I was too busily engaged in discussing the most savoury plateful of food I had eaten for the last month & more to bestow a thought on anything of less importance, however when the table was cleared & the dessert brought in, Bud wheeled the round table nearer the open window poured out a glass of sack seated himself in his cushioned armchair & then said in that quiet satisfactory tone which men use when they are perfectly comfortable :
“What shall we talk about Charley.”
“anything you like” I replied .
“Anything?” said he “why that means just nothing, but what would you like?”
“Dear Bud” was my answer “since you have been kind enough to leave the choice of a topic to me there is nothing I should enjoy so much as one of your delightful tales if you would but favour me this once I shall consider myself eternally obliged to you.”
Of course Bud according to the universal fashion of all story-tellers refused at first but after a world of flattery, coaxing & intreating he at length complied with my request & related the following incidents which I now present to the reader not exactly in the original form of words in which I heard it but strictly preserving the sense & facts.
July 10th -33. C. Wellesley
CHAPTER THE FIRST
Twenty years since or thereabouts there stood in what is now the middle of Verdopolis but which was then the extremity a huge irregular building called the Genii’s Inn. it contained more than five hundred appartments all comfortably & some splendidly fitted up for the accommodation of travellers who were entertained in this vast hostelry free of expense, it became in consequence of this generous regulation the almost exclusive resort of wayfarers of every nation who in spite of the equivocal character of the host & hostesses being the four chief Genii, Talli, Brani, Emi, & Anni & the despicable villany of the waiters & other attendants which noble offices were filled by subordinate spirits of the same species continually flocked thither in prodigious multitudes; the sound of their hurrying footsteps, the voice of rude revel, & the hum of business has ceased now among the ruined arches, the damp mouldy vaults, the dark halls & the desolate chambers of this once mighty edifice which was destroyed in the great rebellion, & now stands silent, & lonely in the heart of Great Verdopolis. But our business is with the past, not the present day, therefore let us leave moping to the owls & look on the bright side of matters; On the evening of the fourth of June 1814 it offered rather a different appearance, there had been during that day a greater influx of guests than usual - which circumstance was owing to a Grand fete to be held on the morrow, the great hall looked like a motley masquerade in one part was seated cross legged on the pavement a group of Turkish merchants who in those days used to trade largely with the shopkeepers & citizens of Verdopolis in spices, shawls, silks, muslins, jewellry, perfumes, & other articles of oriental luxury, these sat composedly smoking their long pipes & drinking choice sherbet & reclining against the cushions which had been provided for their accommodation. Near them a few dark sunburnt Spaniards strutted with the gravely proud air of a peacock, which bird according to the received opinion dares not look downwards lest his feet should break the self complacent spell which enchants him. Not far from these lords of creation sat a company of round, rosy-faced, curly-pated, straight-legged one-shoed beings, from Stumps’es Island, where that now nearly obsolete race of existences then flourished like the green bay tree, more than a dozen Genii were employed in furnishing them with melons & rice pudding for which they roared out incessantly.
at the opposite extremity of the hall five or six sallow, bilious Englishmen were conversing over a cup of green-tea. behind them a band of withered monsieurs sat presenting each other with fine white bread peculiarly rich elegant prussian butter,” perfumed snutf brown sugar & calico. at no great distance from these half withered apes, within the great carved screen that surrounded a huge blazing fire two gentlemen had established themselves before a table on which smoked a tempting dish of beefsteaks with the due accompaniments of onions ketchup & cayenne flanked by a large silver vessel of prime old Canary & a corresponding tankard of spiced ale.
One of the personages whose good fortune it was to be the devourer of such choice cheer was a middle-aged man who might perhaps have numbered his fifty-fif|th year, his rusty black habiliments, powdered wig & furrowed brow spoke at once the scholar & the despiser of external decorations; the other presented a remarkable contrast to his companion, he was in the prime of life being apparently not more than six or seven & twenty years of age. a head of light brown hair arranged in careless yet tasteful curls well became the pleasing though not strictly regular features of his very handsome countenance to which a bright & bold blue eye added all the charms of expression. His form evincing both strength & symmetry was set of to the best advantage by a military costume while his erect bearing & graceful address gave additional testimony to the nature of his profession.
“this young soldier” said Bud with a kindling eye “ was myself, you may laugh Charlev;” for I could not forbear a smile on contrasting the dignified corporation of my now somewhat elderly fat friend with the description he had just given of his former appearance “you may laugh but I was once as gallant a youth as ever wore a soldiers sword. alack a day time troubles Good Liquour & good-living change a man sorely”
But the reader will ask who was the other gentleman mentioned above, he was John Gilford then the bosom friend of Ensign Bud as he is now of Captain Bud. There was a profound silence so long as their savoury meal continued but when the last mouthful of beef, the last shred of onion the last grain of cayenne & the last drop of ketchup had disappeared, Gilford laid down his knife & fork, uttered a deep sigh & opening his oracular jaws said “Well Bud I suppose the fools whom we see here gathered together from all the winds of heaven are come to our Babylonian City for the unworthy purpose of beholding the gauds & vanities of tomorrow.”
“Doubtless” replied the other “And I sincerely hope that you Sir also will not disdain to honnour their exhibition with your presence.”
“I!” almost yelled the senior gentleman, “I go & see the running of chariots, the racing & prancing of horses, the goring of wild beasts, the silly craft of archery & the brutal sport of the wrestlers! art thou mad or are thy brains troubled with the good wine & nutmeg ale” here the speaker filled his glass with the latter generous liquid.
“I am neither one nor t’other Gilford” answered Bud, “but I’ll venture to say that forasmuch as you despise those gauds & vanities as you call them, many a better man than you is longing for tomorrow on their account”
“Ah! & I suppose thou art among the number of those arrant fools”
“Aye truly said! I see no shame in the avowal”
“Don’t you indeed, Oh Bud, Bud I sometimes hope that you are beginning to be sensible of the folly of these pursuits. I sometimes dare to imagine that you will one day be found a member of that chosen band who despising the weak frivolities of this our degenerate age, turn studiously to the contemplation of the past who value as some men do gold & jewels every remnant however small however apparently trivial which offers a memento of vanished generations.”
“Goodness Gifford! how you talk! I like well enough to see Melchizedecs cup for the sacramental wine, the tethers by which Abraham’s camels were fastened in their pasture-grounds or even the thigh bone & shoulder-blade of one of our own worthy old Giants even when these latter articles turn out to be the remains of a dead elephant. (Ah