battered and broken, and vulnerable to the attentions of someone like Bella. ‘Well,’ she said at last. ‘I think you should just turn up and act like nothing’s wrong. Buy something lovely for the baby and behave as you normally would. You owe it to Ben …’
Matt stood up suddenly. ‘Just going to the loo,’ he said, by way of explanation as he strode off.
Charlotte and Freya watched him go. ‘He’s taken it quite badly,’ Freya began. ‘I think he’s just so unbelievably hurt. He and Ben have been inseparable since primary school. It just seems so unfair that this … this bitch, can have got her claws into him so quickly and so bloody effectively.’
Charlotte shifted in her seat uncomfortably. ‘It does,’ she agreed. ‘What if you were to speak to him? Alone.’
‘How?’ Freya looked gloomy. ‘She never leaves him on his own for a minute.’
‘She’s not with him at work. You could go and wait for him outside his office.’
Freya smiled slightly, as she digested the idea. ‘What? Ambush him, you mean?’
Charlotte picked up her glass and took a large slug of her wine. ‘Well, yes, I suppose that is what I mean. But at least Bella wouldn’t be there and you could ask him outright why he’s shutting you and Matt out all of a sudden.’
Freya squirmed in her seat and worry lines creased her brow. ‘I don’t know … what if he gets cross with me?’
‘Why would he? You haven’t done anything wrong. And you know Ben – he absolutely adores you.’
‘Do you think so?’
‘Yes, absolutely!’ Charlotte could feel herself warming to her theme. ‘And you never know, he might have a perfectly rational explanation that will put your mind at rest and then you can reassure Matt that it’s just a temporary blip and things will be back to normal soon.’
Freya reached across the table and took Charlotte’s hand in hers. ‘Oh God, I miss you so much, Charlie. We both do.’
‘I miss you guys, too.’ Charlotte swallowed hard, afraid she might cry.
‘Is there anyone on the scene at all?’ Freya dropped her hand and changed the subject, as if sensing that Charlotte might be wobbling.
Charlotte wrinkled her nose and shook her head. ‘No, not really. I don’t think I’m in the right frame of mind to have a relationship at the moment, anyway, so it’s probably no bad thing.’
‘No, maybe not.’ Freya looked suddenly wistful and smiled. ‘Although it would be great if you could find someone nice and we could have a whole new foursome.’
Charlotte tried to smile, but found that the corners of her mouth refused to turn upwards. ‘The trouble is that I found someone nice and dumped him, like the complete bloody idiot I am. Now all I can think is that there’ll never be anyone as good as him again.’
Freya shook her head. ‘I’m not going to say that I always thought there was something lacking in your relationship with Ben because I didn’t. But for you to have broken up with him when you did, when he was on the verge of proposing …’
Charlotte spluttered on her wine and her eyes widened. ‘What?’
Freya’s cheeks flushed slightly and she nodded. ‘Yes … I thought you knew? He didn’t exactly make a secret of it.’
Charlotte looked away, thinking. Yes, she probably did know, and maybe that’s what had made her get cold feet so suddenly. It was the enormity of it all.
‘So, what I’m saying,’ Freya continued, ‘is that you obviously did think there was something not quite right. Don’t be too hard on yourself, Charlie, because maybe, just maybe, you did the right thing for you.’
Charlotte so wanted to believe her. To think that she had been unhappy and that the relationship had run its course. But she knew deep down that it hadn’t and that she had just had a panic about the future and wanted to clear her head. Now it was too late and whatever she did, she couldn’t turn back time and make everything right again.
Freya pulled her fitted leather jacket a little tighter around her body. It was a surprisingly chilly day for early March and she stamped her feet to try to warm up her feet inside her ankle boots, as she scanned the lunchtime crowds for Ben’s familiar dark head. As he was usually a few inches taller than everyone else around him, she had thought that he’d be easier to spot, but she hadn’t caught sight of him yet and was beginning to worry that maybe she’d missed him.
She was just contemplating giving up, when he appeared, head down and his hands stuffed deep in to the pockets of his coat, which looked considerably warmer than hers.
‘Ben!’ Freya stepped into his path and gave a nervous wave.
Ben’s eyes widened in surprise and he pulled up sharply. ‘Hey, Freya! What a lovely surprise!’ He held his arms out widely and pulled her into a hug.
Freya allowed herself to be drawn into his embrace and held on to him for what she knew was a fraction too long. She could feel the tears pricking her eyes as she felt a wave of longing. The aching familiarity of him was so strong that, for the first time, she realized how painfully she had borne his absence and truly understood how Matt must have been feeling.
‘What are you doing here?’ Ben gently extricated himself from her arms and shoved his hands back into the pockets of his overcoat, shuffling from foot to foot.
Freya took a deep breath. ‘I wanted to see you. You haven’t been returning our calls and our texts aren’t getting through …’ She hesitated. ‘I just wanted to make sure you were OK.’
Ben frowned. ‘Yeah, everything’s fine. Look, I was just about to grab a sandwich, do you want to join me?’
Freya beamed. ‘I’d love to.’
They headed for a café near Ben’s office and found a table. ‘What can I get you?’ he asked, gesturing towards the counter.
‘Oh, thanks, Ben. A cheese and ham toastie would be lovely.’
Ben smiled. ‘Of course. I should have remembered. I’ll have the same.’
Freya watched him ordering and paying for their food, trying to analyse whether there was anything different about him. He looked a bit more tired and there were shadows under his eyes but that was understandable with a new baby. Other than that, he looked pretty much the same as he ever had.
He carried a tray over to their small, round, marble table. ‘Dinner is served!’
Freya laughed. ‘And very nice it looks, too. Thank you.’
Ben took a seat opposite her and picked up his toastie, taking a huge bite. ‘Mmmm, I haven’t had one of these for ages. Bloody lovely!’
‘Yep,’ Freya agreed, as they chewed in comfortable silence. ‘So, how is Elodie?’
Ben smiled, as crumbs spilled out of his mouth and he wiped them with a napkin. ‘She’s adorable. Really gorgeous.’
‘Got any photos?’
‘Hang on.’ Ben finished his toastie with one final huge bite and wiped his hands on his napkin before fumbling for his phone. He frowned slightly as he scrolled through his pictures, until he found one he liked and handed it to Freya.
On the screen was a picture of Bella looking serenely at the camera, clutching a beautiful baby girl with a shock of black hair to her chest. ‘Oh my, Ben, she is so, so lovely. They both are.’ As she looked back at the screen, a message notification flashed up, blocking the photo.
Bella: Where the fuck are you?
‘Oh!