kind to other people. We should work together, form good relationships, and not just think about ourselves. I think it’s very good to be concerned about society.
However, now we see some very bad events, especially in Iran, that are actually not part of real Islam. My father is a mullah; he studied Islam, but he doesn’t like the Iranian government and the form of Islam that governs [there] and mixes politics, economics, and business with Islam.
It’s difficult to know what Islam says, because during different periods it changed and each time it has taken the color of that time and place. I can’t say that I’m a real Muslim because there are some things that I disagree with, but I try to follow the aspects I like.
I’m satisfied because I have my prayers and all day, I have the time to be quiet and contemplate. Everyone needs some moments like this. All day we work and worry and keep busy. In our solitary times we can try to connect with peace, quiet, and kindness. That makes me happy and relaxed.
Meena: I believe in praying five times a day, and for me, hijab is very important. But I think that being clean in your heart makes the biggest difference, whether or not you keep the hijab. A really good Muslim woman would have a clean heart, be a kind person, and be honest with her family, her community, and everyone.
Peggy: What is the most important part of Islam for women?
Setara: As a woman, I like my hijab and I feel very comfortable in it. The burqa is not hijab. This is also in my poem.5 Additionally, under Islam, women cannot be forced to marry someone. Many women are forced here, but it’s not part of Islam.
Shakilla S: Islam appreciates mothers and helps women. They say that under the foot of women is heaven, which means that women must go to heaven because they give milk to their children.
Saleha: There are many laws in Islam that support women. For example, since breastfeeding is not a duty or a responsibility, women can ask to be paid for doing it. A woman can ask for payment even for breastfeeding her own children. There are many things like this in Islam that support women.
Ramzia: If the men obey Islam, it has very good points for women. When a woman has a baby or when she breastfeeds, the husband should hire a woman to work for her. And during this time her husband shouldn’t shout at her.
Peggy: How long does that last?
Ramzia: Usually it lasts for two years. Afghan men don’t like this and don’t do it, however. For 40 days a new mother should rest and get strong. She should eat good food like chicken and meat. The new mother must have good food three times a day, sometimes four. She also should stay in the house. If they work in the government, they give them three months’ holiday.
Shakila: Islam requires both men and women to take responsibilities. Islam supports women and families, but in some ways it doesn’t. Both men and women are required to take care of their children, but in different ways. This is good because life is about sharing and it gives them a shared responsibility.
However, I don’t like the part that says a man can take away their children if he and his wife separate, even if he is the one to initiate the separation. The women have no choice in this and it doesn’t depend on their situation or what anyone wants. It’s just the rule. But there are many interpretations about these kinds of things.
Suraya: Women and men have equal rights, but the rights are not the same. They cannot be the same. Women have a right to study, learn, and teach. For example, the Prophet Mohammad’s wife, Aisha, was very bright and a good teacher to the men. That shows me that if you are qualified, you can do anything; you can even teach the men. Everything that Mohammad did was an example for us. When some of the people and mullahs don’t let girls have an education, it is not from Islam. Also, in Islam, you don’t have the right to beat women.
Batool: I think Islam gives men and women equal rights, but it’s not practiced. There is a sentence in the Quran that says a man can beat his wife, but it should not be painful. What does that mean? The mullah says, "Yes, you can beat them," but I think it’s our misunderstanding of Islam. Although Islam has many things that I don’t accept as a Muslim, my problems with it revolve around the misunderstanding of Islam, and how the mullahs misuse their power.
Anisa: I think that in teaching Islam, there should be more emphasis on showing the reason rather than just following blindly. It doesn’t matter what you are I think that in teaching Islam, there should be more emphasis on showing the reason rather than just following blindly. It doesn’t matter what you are:open-minded, in the middle, or close-minded; whatever you do it’s going to look bad to one of them, so we should make our own decisions.
Dr. Yacoobi: Islam is a democratic religion. It provides women with many rights. It provides kindness, equality, and a fair share. However, people are taking away those rights in the name of Islam. I feel that if women can read, write, and think critically, then they can ask questions and nobody can abuse them because they will be able to respond logically with what is right and what is wrong.
Additionally, Islam is not against education for girls. People who say that are ignorant. My father was illiterate but he allowed me to get an education, and he wasn’t unusual.
Peggy: What part of your belief in Islam has helped you the most?
When I asked this question, Siebewal flew into a rage. She showered my translator with a torrent of anger while I sat and wondered how I’d offended her.