me lots about you.”
“What did he say?” I asked with apprehension.
“He spoke highly of you,” said Kevin. “Michael tells me that you are interested in healing.”
“Lately it has become an important part of my life,” I said.
“I am also very interested in healing. I’m a minister of a New Thought Church,” said Kevin.
“Dinner is ready,” said Michael as he lit the candles placed in an elaborate candelabrum. Michael served dinner and then eyed me mischievously. He gently placed a mussel drenched with butter into my mouth.
“Hey, these things are great,” I said with surprise.
Kevin nodded in agreement and then told us about his church and beliefs. “Yesterday, a man was lying on the side of the road. He was unconscious so I took him to one of the shelters. He looked like he had not had a decent meal in a week.”
“There are many people in our city who need help,” said Michael.
“I wonder how many people really care?” I asked.
“Being homeless and hungry is not just a third-world problem. It happens here too,” said Kevin.
Daniel was uneasy with the conversation. He moved about in his chair like he was trying to avoid the subject. Did he fear poverty because he was terrified of being in the same circumstances? I felt compassion for his fear as I did for the impoverished people. “What’s for dessert?” asked Daniel, trying to change the subject.
“How about ice cream?” asked Michael. “Wendy and I can get some from the corner store.”
Michael and I walked down the alley hopping over puddles of water from an afternoon rain shower. We were like two little kids. Michael had a playfulness that most adults had lost. I laughed when I missed dry land and put my foot in the middle of a big puddle. We walked down the alley intentionally bumping into each other. Michael and I laughed and made jokes all the way to the store.
We peered into the frozen dairy section and Michael looked at his reflection in the glass. “It’s been a long time since I’ve taken a good look at myself in a mirror. Sometimes it’s difficult to fully appreciate our own beauty. I usually look into a mirror with judgment. I guess I don’t look half-bad.”
My immediate reaction was that it was vain to look in the mirror and appreciate one’s self. There was an important lesson in what Michael had said. Self-love was important to any healing.
Michael bought vanilla Haagen Daz and we headed back to Daniel’s house. “I feel like I’m becoming more in tune with myself, Michael. I believe healing comes from inside me, but I don’t know what that means yet.”
“We all have growing and learning to do. There’s nothing like the school of life,” said Michael as he hopped over a puddle.
“I guess there is a positive side to experiencing a health challenge. It is an opportunity to learn,” I said while looking up at the stars. “Why is life such a mystery?”
Daniel and Kevin had disappeared when we returned to the house. Michael and I sat on the sofa and I enviously watched him savoring each mouthful of vanilla ice cream. “Would you like a taste?” asked Michael as he teased me with a spoon full of sweetness.
“Sure, why not? One spoonful won’t hurt me.” Michael carefully pushed a spoonful of vanilla ice cream into my mouth and I could not believe how it tasted. “This definitely tastes better than wheat grass.” I had not experienced its creamy texture and sweet flavor in over a year.
Michael decided to extend his visit for a couple of weeks. This news filled me with joy because he would be able to take a few of my dance classes at the College. Although I was still very tired from my struggle with my health, I had decided to teach for another semester.
Michael was now staying with his friend Peter who lived downtown. Peter had an elegant apartment with a cushy black couch and an old-fashioned wardrobe style cabinet. Quartz crystals and other impressive stones were scattered on the coffee table. As I looked at the crystals, I noticed a white book beside them. It seemed to be calling me. “What is this book about?”
“Have I told you about Ramtha?” asked Michael.
“No,” I said waiting to hear more.
“Ramtha is a great teacher in spirit form. He helps people to find themselves and conquer their fears. If you’ve got a fear, Ramtha will make it happen. You soon learn to get over your anxieties.”
It was beyond my understanding how any spirit could make things happen in a person’s life. I found the thought of anyone manifesting my fears about my health terrifying. “It sounds really weird to me.” I reminded myself to keep an open mind.
Michael explained that Ramtha was channeled by J.Z. Knight. A channeler was someone who allowed a spirit to talk through them. I was afraid to hear any more about Ramtha because I did not want him to manifest my fears, even if it might help me to get over them.
I sat on the sofa and took my blood pressure. “Oh, no! My blood pressure is very high again. This always scares me because of the eye and kidney stuff!” Maybe Ramtha was already manifesting my fears.
“Try to remain calm, Wendy. Sit there and relax for a moment. Peter and I were experimenting with something last night. I want to try it with you. Just breathe deeply.” Michael sat with a very upright posture in front of me, and an intense look of concentration came over his face. He seemed to be looking into the depths of my soul. Although I did not understand what he was doing, I began to feel calm. “Now take your blood pressure.”
I took another reading. “It’s lower, but it is still far from normal. I reached for my bottle of pills and slumped down into the sofa, almost sliding onto the floor.
Michael embraced my body, crouching over me. I was surprised he did not fall on top of me. It seemed like a peculiar position to hug someone. Michael had succeeded in making me laugh. “You are going to be fine, Wendy.” I wished that I could be as confident about my health as Michael.
“Maybe I should visit you in Santa Barbara and do that seminar you were talking about. It might help.”
“There will be another Sage Experience in January,” said Michael. “I think it would be very valuable for you.”
There was something I wanted to ask Michael, but I wondered if I had the courage. “If I visit you in Santa Barbara, could you hold me in your arms one night as a friend?” For several reasons, I had an extraordinary fear of men. I was hopeful that Michael would be able to help me heal this fear. There was a part of me that longed to simply be held.
“I would be happy to do that for you,” said Michael as I curled into a little ball facing him on the sofa. Michael pulled my foot into his lap and started to massage it.
I had read that newborn babies die if they were not held. It seemed that touch was an important aspect of health. There were times that I had experienced such extensive touch depravation that I felt like a part of me was dying.
We arrived early for dance class, and sat at a round table near the snack bar. Michael reached across the table and held my hand. “It was interesting what came up for me at Sage when we were going through family issues.” Michael told me about some things that had happened in his childhood.
“Our lives have many parallels,” I said.
Michael’s face tightened as he looked at me with sad eyes. I could feel his pain. “I don’t know why this stuff is coming up again for me now. It was supposed to have been released when I did the seminar.”
I squeezed Michael’s hand and listened with compassion. “Michael, a lifetime of emotions may take a little time to understand.”
“Many psychics have said that I hold anger within me. If it’s there, I don’t